Three And Out: Useless Predictions For Sunday's Game
Last week, I really wasn't right about anything. Unless you count the part about JaMarcus Russell being incompetent, which is a universal truth that I shouldn't get credit for parroting. Can I do better this week? Probably not, but I've never let repeated public failure stop me before, and I'm not going to start now. Three (3) things sure to happen on Sunday afternoon in Arizona when your Houston Texans take the field:
1. Matt Schaub will outplay Kurt Warner, and it's going to be because Steve Slaton has more success than Beanie Wells does. Arizona has been awful against the pass, though we should temper that point by noting that Houston is somehow ranked ninth against the pass in the same rankings, and there's not a reasonable Texans fan alive who really believes this secondary is better than 22 other teams. I'm calling another 300 yard passing day for Schaub (314 to be exact), featuring 3 TDs and 1 INT. Slaton, meanwhile, is going to bust a TD run of his own and finish with 82 yards rushing.
2. Larry Fitzgerald's going to explode for 2 TDs and Anquan Boldin will add one of his own. Together, they will forcefully remind us that Arizona is a far cry from Oakland. Silver lining: Dunta Robinson gets his first INT of the season.
3. From the Department of Leaps of Faith: Connor Barwin gets his first sack as a professional football player. From the Department of Much More Likely Things To Occur: Mario Williams, hurt shoulder and all, adds two (2) sacks of his own.
PUT YOUR NAME ON IT: Yes, it will be a shootout. It's going to be great fun to watch, as long as you can deal with the fact that the Texans' defense is going to get smoked for touchdowns a handful of times. In fact, I'm predicting overtime. Where, unfortunately, the Cardinals will win the coin flip and then win the game. Texans 31, Cardinals 34.
That, or the entire Texans squad is struck by Ebola and perishes before kickoff. One or the other.
0 recs |
29 comments
|
Comments
enthusiastically disagree sir!
our secondary will show up.. and show out. final score:
texans 27 cards 13.
You are banned from Music City Miracles. (twice)
You are banned from Blogging The Boys.
by chrisd21 on Oct 9, 2009 1:52 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
btw....
im over at brokeback mustang (a.k.a stampede blue) giving em shit.
You are banned from Music City Miracles. (twice)
You are banned from Blogging The Boys.
by chrisd21 on Oct 9, 2009 1:57 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
This one is tough to call...
These teams are very close in talent and the circumstances need to be just right for either to win.
I’m going to say that:
1. Houston Defense shows up beleiving in itself after last week and owns the line of scrimmage.
2. Offense plays well but the run still struggles a bit against a good Arizona front seven.
3. Final: Houston 28 Arizona 24
"An open mind is like a fortress with it's gates unbarred and unguarded."
The ROSENFAIL : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CAKAKE-uq-8&feature=related
by TexansForever on Oct 9, 2009 2:07 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
James
I posted a comment that you proposed on fleaflicker. Let me know if you’re up for it.
by Jordann on Oct 9, 2009 2:22 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
OMW to check it out...
"An open mind is like a fortress with it's gates unbarred and unguarded."
The ROSENFAIL : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CAKAKE-uq-8&feature=related
by TexansForever on Oct 9, 2009 2:35 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Responded
"An open mind is like a fortress with it's gates unbarred and unguarded."
The ROSENFAIL : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CAKAKE-uq-8&feature=related
by TexansForever on Oct 9, 2009 2:39 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
I'm calling another 300 yard passing day for Schaub (314 to be exact)
More like 315.
by Jordann on Oct 9, 2009 2:08 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
I see
2 sacks for super Mario.
And Glover with an int.
If carrots got you drunk, rabbits would be fucked up.
You are banned from Music City Miracles.
Happy Now Tits?
You are banned from Blogging The Boys.
You are banned from Silver Screen and Roll.
by CFHTim on Oct 9, 2009 2:09 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
If we spend
The first couple of drives trying to ‘establish the run’ on our way to an early deficit, we will probably lose this game. Hopefully Baby Shan has the good sense to throw the ball to Andre early and often- I don’t see our secondary matching up well here.
by JimboTexan on Oct 9, 2009 2:58 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
agree
on all points
Smushiak will take us to the playoffs in 2009.
by texanphil on Oct 9, 2009 3:19 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Establishing the run
Is a myth. Teams that win run the ball after they’ve established a lead.
When I'm on the mic, I'm like global warming, you can't ignore me.
by tehGrindCrusher on Oct 10, 2009 7:15 AM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
defense
makin strides. Staying gap sound. Getting pressure.
Whichever team this applies to will win the game. I think it will be us, in a surprise… to some.
Smushiak will take us to the playoffs in 2009.
by texanphil on Oct 9, 2009 3:21 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
All these predictions...
are perfectly within the realm of being possible! What’s going on?
I suppose if all of the stars, moons and planets align it could be possible, but what are the chances of that?
by Rip Jersey on Oct 9, 2009 5:28 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
It's A Long Shot
In a frenzy of violence, Cushing rips off the right arm of Cardinals TE Stephen Spach, and uses it as a club to beat Kurt Warner senseless. Because Warner is beaten before releasing the pass, there is no penalty on the play. Cushing is applauded on BRB for his initiative and an aggressive style of play. Being a good sport, he provides the arm to medics, for later reattachment.
The Texans roll to a 39-36 victory over Arizona.
by kozanack on Oct 9, 2009 11:09 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Diagnosing a healthy amount of Cush-Lash for Warner, huh?
One thing is for sure, I don’t think we’ll be seeing many secondary highlights from either team. It will be a high scoring shootout, maybe the highest scoring game of the year.
I would challenge you to a battle of wits, but you appear to be unarmed.
by The Night Owl on Oct 10, 2009 12:06 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Another unlikely prediction
In a Football Miracle, the Titans fall to 0-5 and the Colts to 4-1.
by WhiskeyR on Oct 10, 2009 11:14 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
That's not a miracle
It’s a soon to be reality.
by JimboTexan on Oct 11, 2009 9:10 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Well, so far in the season
the Texans are:
0-1 wearing all white
1-0 wearing blue top/white pants
0-1 wearing battle red
1-0 wearing white top/blue pants
For some reason, we play better when we wear our home uni’s (blue top/white pants). And with our previous success at home the last couple of years, the Texans have more wins in this jersey combo than any other.
I say we win in the desert tomorrow 37-31. Kevin Walter is a sleeper in this matchup, so expect him to put up good numbers. We will try to force the run too often, but Slaton will put up decent numbers.
by BdoFiFtY81 on Oct 10, 2009 11:47 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Liberty white
That has to be the least intimidating combination in the league, I mean look at Penn State
by JKMac on Oct 10, 2009 2:40 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Their solid blue unis are siiiiiiick though.
by nolander on Oct 10, 2009 7:59 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
I vote for blue and white stripes
Like a barber shop pole.
Note to self: Insert something witty here.
by bigfatdrunk on Oct 10, 2009 8:41 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
win streak
the shaub wil rise the defense will manhandle the red birds and the score will be toros 32-28 cardenales!!!!!!!!!
by severo on Oct 10, 2009 5:11 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
considering....
Considering that each of my 5 fantasy football teams is heavily stocked with Texans and Cardinals — I am all for a 34-31 shootout in the Texans’ favor.
I think Walter has another huge game tomorrow… Andre will get the yards, but Walter and OD probably get all the red zone looks.
by grungedave on Oct 10, 2009 7:01 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
I'm pretty anxious about this game
It’s kind of like we’re playing our doppleganger. I’m gonna go ahead and call a 4 point Texans win, and it will confirm Arizona’s Super Bowl loss hangover season.
by MadMartygan on Oct 10, 2009 8:30 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
It's Sunday Morning
And I have a good feeling about the game today. I’m sure there will be sme big plays given up, but I think we will beat the Cardinals at their own game; the aerial attack. I’m calling a victory:
Texans 31 – Cardinals 24
You know... for kids.
by Jake on Oct 11, 2009 6:17 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
I thought we were going to lose the last game
…and we didn’t.
So I’m calling a victory for us this week. The Cards O isn’t as good as ours, and they have their defensive issues.
This of course assumes our D plays better than a D III college.
When I'm on the mic, I'm like global warming, you can't ignore me.
by tehGrindCrusher on Oct 11, 2009 7:30 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
u gonna be able to watch?
AND WHERE ARE MY HOOKERS???
Note to self: Insert something witty here.
by bigfatdrunk on Oct 11, 2009 9:00 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
I'm back home
And may watch. But these late afternoon games are late out here.
Also, couldn’t get any hookers through immigration. Apparently they’re onto that angle.
Had a cabbie try to sell me on a ping-pong show. Any ideas what that is?
When I'm on the mic, I'm like global warming, you can't ignore me.
by tehGrindCrusher on Oct 11, 2009 9:21 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs

by 






















