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Around SBN: Champions League Preview with Jimmy Conrad

Mocking the Cowboys, David Carr, and Vince/Kerry; talking time travel paradoxes (again); and just generally proving that idle hands are the devil's playthings.

over 1 year ago Tumblr_l2ecwbvekp1qbhedwo1_500_tiny MDC 18 comments 1 recs  | 

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Work of art.

A Texans fan. Really. No, I'm not kidding.
http://www.battleredblog.com

by bigfatdrunk on Oct 26, 2010 2:53 PM CDT reply actions  

My guess is Foster's carries will vary inversely proportional to the amount of rushing yards he gains

i.e. the more yards he gets, the less carries he recieves…because that just seems to be the genius of Kubes..

/bangingheadontable

by leacheatsbabies on Oct 26, 2010 3:20 PM CDT reply actions  

You know what scares me?

I read that and thought “yeah, he’s probably right.”

"MDC: Droppin' knowledge like a librarian with Parkinson's." --Jonathan Loesche

"He tells me he’s playing, he’s playing." --Gary Kubiak, on Andre Johnson

by MDC on Oct 26, 2010 3:40 PM CDT up reply actions  

I did the exact same thing.

Just my $.02
Even duct tape can't fix stupid

by txknight on Oct 26, 2010 9:20 PM CDT up reply actions  

As for the Terminator paradox

If they prevent Skynet from being built in the first place, then it creates a tangent in the flow of time. True, no Skynet = no rebellion, no Kyle, no Kyle getting tender with Sarah Connor, no John Connor, etc. But, there would also be no NEED for any of those things if there is no Skynet. John Connor would probably be conceived, though not by Kyle, and probably wouldn’t be the same kind of person.

Remember Back to the Future?

I am a visionary, I am a genius, and now I am angry! Now help me find my pants!

by UprootedTexan on Oct 26, 2010 4:33 PM CDT reply actions  

However what you forget is Terminator 3

Judgment Day was inevitable no matter what they changed, & the Terminator was sent back to ensure John Connor survived it when the Terminatrix was sent back to kill him & the resistance leadership. So in theory, the paradox was closed since no matter how much they tried to change the future, the end result always ended with Judgment Day.

I would challenge you to a battle of wits, but you appear to be unarmed.

by The Night Owl on Oct 26, 2010 10:57 PM CDT up reply actions  

In my mind

T3 doesn’t exist.

I am Sancho

by HoustonTransplant on Oct 27, 2010 1:08 AM CDT up reply actions  

But T3 Closes the paradox

Therefore it has to be included

I would challenge you to a battle of wits, but you appear to be unarmed.

by The Night Owl on Oct 27, 2010 8:33 AM CDT up reply actions  

By creating a blackhole of suck?

"Progress isn't made by early risers. It's made by lazy men trying to find easier ways to do something." -Robert Heinlein
http://www.accessorizeyourvehicle.com/

by nolander on Oct 27, 2010 1:23 PM CDT up reply actions  

I'm glad they only made the one Matrix movie

http://xkcd.com/566/

A Texas Wannabe, born and raised in New Zealand. Currently located 7343miles South west of Houston.

by distant_texans_fan on Oct 28, 2010 12:35 AM CDT up reply actions  

The difference

is that Back to the Future worked with a linear timeflow, whereas Terminator had the aforementioned time loop (John sending his own dad back to father him, etc.). So if John made himself not exist, that means, in the next loop, he’s not around to send his dad back, which means he’s not born, which means that Cyberdyne Systems doesn’t get destroyed, which means that, in theory, Skynet or some other version of self-aware computer could still be created down the road (because, remember, Cyberdyne was focused almost entirely on A.I. stuff).

"MDC: Droppin' knowledge like a librarian with Parkinson's." --Jonathan Loesche

"He tells me he’s playing, he’s playing." --Gary Kubiak, on Andre Johnson

by MDC on Oct 27, 2010 11:25 AM CDT up reply actions  

I Laughed..I Cried..then became enraged!!

Love the post. I get a kick out of it every week. However, the combination of my inability to let go of a grudge and the Texans history with David Carr create the perfect storm of gamma radiated, Hulk-like rage. What started out as a happy afternoon reviewing Carr’s epic fails…sparked a memory of an article I read before his San Fran signing that pointed out the REAL contract dollars he has earned as an absolutely TERRIBLE QB (Blood pressure rising). I began searching for said article (couldn’t locate – vein in neck begins to pulse)…convinced myself he has earned (I use that term loosely) 10’s of millions as a useless bag of suck (left eye twitching uncontrollably)…stumble upon an article Little Dickie Justice contributed to SFGate.com as a guest columnist as to how the Texans “never gave David Carr a chance” (rips off shirt…throws in-box off desk into wall…crashes through office door… smashes cars in lot…bites heads of kittens)!!!

by CTacc on Oct 26, 2010 4:55 PM CDT reply actions  

poor cars

oh you thought I was goin to say kittens didn’t you.

I heard Brian Cushing like to do it with girls in a really uncomfortable place and i am not talking about the back seat of a Volkswagen
Go Texans!

by Taco Joe on Oct 26, 2010 8:08 PM CDT up reply actions  

Again, a great write up

I do have a couple of comments….

Why is NFL initial-ism, and NASA an acronym? I wasn’t aware of the difference.

Supertroopers is one of the greatest movies ever made. My gf can’t sleep without background noise, so she puts a dvd on every night. 5 nights out of 7, it’ll be Supertroopers. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve drifted off to sleep, giggling and hearing, donk, “Hey! What the F…”, “Sit down Rando”, Rando sits, donk

A Texas Wannabe, born and raised in New Zealand. Currently located 7343miles South west of Houston.

by distant_texans_fan on Oct 26, 2010 5:24 PM CDT reply actions  

With NFL you actually say each letter individually.

With NASA, it’s a single word, as opposed to saying N.A.S.A.

I am a visionary, I am a genius, and now I am angry! Now help me find my pants!

by UprootedTexan on Oct 26, 2010 5:27 PM CDT up reply actions  

soccer is actually an acronym

on my fone so don’t have the energy to look up what it once stood for

I heard Brian Cushing like to do it with girls in a really uncomfortable place and i am not talking about the back seat of a Volkswagen
Go Texans!

by Taco Joe on Oct 26, 2010 8:10 PM CDT up reply actions  

I appologize...

Soccer actually comes from an abbreviation of Association which eventually went from Assoc. to Soccer… and if any limies tell you that you are a wank for calling “football” soccer tell them it was their people who originated the word!

I heard Brian Cushing like to do it with girls in a really uncomfortable place and i am not talking about the back seat of a Volkswagen
Go Texans!

by Taco Joe on Oct 27, 2010 4:18 AM CDT up reply actions   1 recs

I see

We could fix that by calling it the “NeFil” It is quicker to say…

A Texas Wannabe, born and raised in New Zealand. Currently located 7343miles South west of Houston.

by distant_texans_fan on Oct 26, 2010 9:07 PM CDT up reply actions  

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