If I'm writing a post about hot dogs, that post will ALWAYS begin with a link to Will Ferrell as Harry Caray. It's one of the rules by which I live my life.

Your Houston Texans don't feature, and haven't really ever featured, many players who would qualify as "hot dogs." They're far more likely to employ guys like Andre Johnson, DeMeco Ryans, and Matt Schaub--quiet guys who let their play do the talking.

Upon considerable reflection, and because I need some sort of tie-in to frankfurters, the clearest candidate on the current roster for the "hot dog" label is undoubtedly Jacoby Jones. From his end zone dances to his Twitter account (which is far more enjoyable in the offseason), he commands your attention, for better or worse.

Flawless segue...you know what else should command your attention? A free trip to see a bowl game of your choice: