Three And Out: Useless Predictions For Sunday's Game

by Tim on Dec 17, 2010 11:15 PM CST in News

For the first time since January of 2006, your Houston Texans will play a game that doesn't see Mario Williams starting at defensive end, thanks to Super Mario being placed on injured reserve earlier this week. Given all the problems that this defense has, that's a terrifying thought. Can Antonio Smith and Mark Anderson pick up the slack? The answer to that question can be found in the first prediction after the jump.

1. Yes. The answer is yes. Mark Anderson continues to show he's the latest example of Rick Smith making street free agent lemonade out of gritty street free agent lemons; mark him down for 1.5 sacks. Who gets the other half of Anderson's half-sack? Why, Amobi Okoye, of course! How could you have ever doubted him? Editor's Note: I still doubt him.

2. When the Texans tangled with Rusty Smith's Posse a few weeks ago, Arian Foster accounted for 218 yards of the team's 246 yards of offense. Foster fails to duplicate that performance on Sunday, as the Titans limit him to only 119 rushing yards and 52 receiving yards. This time, however, Foster does find the end zone. Twice.

3. Andre Johnson-Cortland Innegan II (Electric Bugaloo) is much ado about nothing. 'Dre finishes with 7 catches for 78 yards and a TD. Innegan, meanwhile, makes sure to stay out of trouble, lest the NFL and/or the wrath of 'Dre come down upon him.

PUT YOUR NAME ON IT: Although he truly could not have appeared to care less the last time these teams met, I remain scared of Randy Moss. With Houston's secondary, I also have a great fear of Kenny Britt. Fortunately, Tennessee apparently doesn't like to play Moss and Britt at the same time. If those two were on the field at the same time, Kerry Collins could drop back from center, close his eyes, and simply throw it as far as he could; one of those two would catch the ball 75% of the time. Make an offering to Durga that this isn't the week Jeff Fisher realizes that; if Fisher did tumble to that fact, I wouldn't be able to say Texans 27, Titans 21. But he hasn't, so I can.

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i am calling it

34-23 Good guys! Andre puts 104 against the almost inevitable 1500 yd mark, arian gets 160 all purpose, cushing gets a whole sack and pollard breaks cj’s dome

I heard Brian Cushing like to do it with girls in a really uncomfortable place and i am not talking about the back seat of a Volkswagen
Go Texans!

by Taco Joe on Dec 17, 2010 11:31 PM CST reply actions

Reverse psychology

I put $20 on the Titans in a bet with a friend. My thinking here is that since I lose almost every single sports bet I make, the Texans are sure to win now. I wanted to just “cheer” for the Titans, but we all know my heart would not really be in it, and I had to make an actual investment of some sort to make this work. I vow if I win, my winnings go straight to the Santa ringing his bell outside my neighborhood Kroger.

by SubCrim on Dec 18, 2010 12:49 AM CST reply actions

Can the O Line give "Mobility Matt" range to run?

.And more to the point will he? I know Matt ain’t’ the most mobile QB in the league, but I do question some of his choices. 3 yds to a first down, no defenders within range to make a stop and making a choice to throw rather than stepping up and if nothing else sliding. I have Zero doubt that Schaub is the dude for our team, but I’de like to see him step it up a bit and show that he’s willing to take a hit.

THE METRODOME! Another fine product brought to you by Frank Bush Engineering, Construction, and Design LLC. 100% Guaranteed to collapse under pressure.

by DTango on Dec 18, 2010 12:52 AM CST reply actions

I can only partly back you up

I’ve seen times when it looked like Schaub could easily just scramble for the 1st and didn’t. However, I don’t think anyone wants to see Schaub take a hit at all. You have seen Orlovsky “play”, right?

by JBal on Dec 18, 2010 11:24 AM CST up reply actions

you mean the guy

that the last time he made an appearance on the field behind center had to borrow Garret Graham’s helmet?

I heard Brian Cushing like to do it with girls in a really uncomfortable place and i am not talking about the back seat of a Volkswagen
Go Texans!

by Taco Joe on Dec 18, 2010 11:27 AM CST up reply actions

ie: Kerry Collins throwing it as far as he can; eyes closed

Does he know how to play QB any other way?

by Cut Block on Dec 18, 2010 2:26 AM CST reply actions

You know, an outside observer could have a fun time writing about the biggest soap opera in the NFL

You have all the conflicted characters you could ask for. You have a the talented but lazy WR who just wants someone to love him. You have the thug CB who reaches out for attention by trying to bully other players, but gets his own treatment shoved down his throat and now faces that same player this week. You have the once wildly popular coach who has swung out of favor with the fans. You have the three-way relationship of QBs; the young first-timer who needs time, the wily veteran whose skills have eroded or never were, and the former first-rounder who has always had everything handed to him and is now on extended leave from the team (not the first time). This is a real-life Hollywood soap opera story in the making.

I don’t need to insert my own three and out fake outcome. All I need to do is sit back and observe.

Texans 28, BESFs 10

Texans keep it under 30, only because they feel sorry for the Titans.

I didn't do anything wrong!.... and, I won't do it again.

Send Vonta Leach to the Beach! http://www.nfl.com/probowl/ballot?

by Rip Jersey on Dec 18, 2010 9:05 AM CST reply actions