Comcast Presents: Albert Haynesworth...Not In A Million Years, Right?
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Albert Haynesworth wants out of Washington. Our compatriots at Hogs Haven are all over the story and are understandably rather peeved. Riddle me this, BRB: Could you stomach the idea of Haynesworth becoming a Houston Texan?
I could not and cannot. Aside from the potential contractual commitment (which doesn't seem to be nearly as daunting as the terms of his deal last year originally made it appear), character/effort/heart concerns, and the unalienable truth that Bill Kollar doesn't dig defensive tackles who are bigger than a breadbox, I simply can't put aside the immeasurable rancor I have for Haynesworth from his time in Tennessee. I loathe him too deeply.
You? Express yourself in the Poll and justify your stance in the Comments.
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37 comments
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Comments
a million times, NO
the fatass is a cancer whose on-field contributions are dwarfed by his immature, delusional character. I wouldn’t take him even if he was playing for free. Not worth it.
by BigTexBD on Jun 18, 2010 8:21 AM CDT reply actions 4 recs
Not if the price WAS right....
I suppose if all of the stars, moons and planets align it could be possible, but what are the chances of that?
What that snippet doesn't cover
is that the Reskins just signed a bonus in April before Fat Albert started sitting out mandatory team practices. Long story short, the Redskins are now maneuvering to get the bonus back through legal means. I think the amount of the bonus we are talking about is pretty high. I think I read somewhere the Redskins want $21 million. Maybe someone can clarify that for me. Anyways, to put that into perspective. Isn’t that bonus about half what the Falcons just signed Dunta for a multi-year deal? Ha! I just interjected Dunta’s name into the Haynesworth flap!
I suppose if all of the stars, moons and planets align it could be possible, but what are the chances of that?
If the price was right...
as in two years, reasonable base money, and big incentives for performance, why the hell wouldn’t you? I mean, we’ve seen how destructive he can be when he has to earn his money.
Look, I hate the BESFs with a passion so intense that I applaud God for dumping all that rain on Nashville. However, the one thing in the whole world that I hate more than them is our continued-since-2002 lack of decent interior D-line play. Is he a piece of shit as a person? Probably. (Read: yes.) But we’ve got a bunch of boy scouts as it is, so I don’t worry that he would cause problems in the lockerroom. So, assuming the price is right, at worst you get a massive talent upgrade from DelJuan Robinson. At best, you get an absolute monster who, paired with Mario, turns his kitten-eating self into the defensive tackle that I cry myself to sleep at night thinking about.
"MDC: Droppin' knowledge like a librarian with Parkinson's." --Jonathan Loesche
sounds like you toss and turn a lot
try taking a shot of jager at bedtime….
I suppose if all of the stars, moons and planets align it could be possible, but what are the chances of that?
I can't see him agreeng to an incentive laden deal
even though he just jacked the Skins for a HUGE pile of skins, some owner will be stupid and/or desperate enough to give him some up front dough. Only after he bends his future boss over and breaks it off in his backside, will the rest of the league wise up, and only maybe at that. This guy is an ass. He has great talent, but now that he has been paid, he just doesn’t give a crap.
I fully agree with your premise that we are and have always been woefully weak in the interior DL, but this guy is not the cure, at least not now. If he is ever backed into a corner to put out on the field to get his $$$, then and only then would he be worth considering.
It took the Astros 44 years to get to the Series, the Oilers-Texans are due to get to the big dance...Go Texans!!!!!
by oiler-texan diehard on Jun 18, 2010 4:31 PM CDT up reply actions
I don't think
Haynesworth is near as coveted now as he was a year ago.. He spent alot of time on the sidelines last year, was a cancer on the team, and gave inconsistent effort all year long.
If the Redskins were able to trade him, I don’t think they’d get more than a 4th round pick to be honest, and whoever gets Haynesworth will be taking a spoiled baby who’s only interested in his own idividual success.
If the Texans ended up with Fat Albert, it’d make me ill. He might be a decent player, but he’s a terrible person and it’s hard for me to root for someone on the field who I can’t even respect as a person at all.
Agree his value has diminished because of his antics in Washington
Think that the Skins would be overjoyed to get a #4 for him, and I would be surprised if they are able to swing that. Agree that I do not want him on the Texans now, and probably never. Spoiled underachieving asswipes are not what we need, no matter how talented they once were. Will not be surprised when he lands a decent deal with his next team, the Raiders.
It took the Astros 44 years to get to the Series, the Oilers-Texans are due to get to the big dance...Go Texans!!!!!
by oiler-texan diehard on Jun 18, 2010 10:19 PM CDT up reply actions
"Spoiled Underachieving Asswipes Are Not What We Need"
OTD, you may have inadvertently stumbled upon a BRB t-shirt slogan.
Looking forward to a day when being a Texans fan doesn't mean that April is the highlight of my season...
by Tim on Jun 19, 2010 12:45 AM CDT via mobile up reply actions 4 recs
I just don't see Opie wearing that one...
I suppose if all of the stars, moons and planets align it could be possible, but what are the chances of that?
Not what was on my mind there, Fat Albert must be my muse.
It took the Astros 44 years to get to the Series, the Oilers-Texans are due to get to the big dance...Go Texans!!!!!
by oiler-texan diehard on Jun 20, 2010 8:36 PM CDT up reply actions
He is a piece of Crap
But for the right price, I would have that mean piece of crap setting in the middle of my D-line. Even when he doesn’t put out effort, he eats up 2 or 3 O linemen blocks, with Cush and Connor, Ryans, and Mario around him, they well go crazy in their production. I think the contract for taking him should say, that he makes the league min, and gets a $15 million bonus each year he makes the probowl!
You can't fix Dumb or being a VYFB
Sure he's a horrible person
But I’d sign Jared Allen too in the right situation. It’s football, and my desire to win crowds out my moralistic impulses.
The difference is...
… Jared Allen is an all-effort player, despite being a grade-A douchebag.
Albert Haynesworth is JaMarcus Russell playing the proper position.
by krkenney on Jun 18, 2010 11:21 AM CDT up reply actions 3 recs
I wonder...
… how much money it would take to convince JaMarcus to play d-line?
If the team wants him, I'm ok with it
…but I doubt they want him. There has to be some bad blood from his Titans days. If they’re willing to team up with Haynesworth, then I’m all for it. He is one of the best DTs in the league, and that position has been dead weight for us. Huge upgrade if there aren’t personal issues.
Considering the alternative of 16 weeks of Shaun Cody
Absolutely. I would even be willing to deal a third rounder for him if it came with a decent contract.
But there is absolutely no way the Texans would EVER consider this. Not only does he not fit the Kollar midget DT mold, but he also is a bad locker room guy.
- Rivers McCown, From Mom's Basement | Twitter
he also punches babies in the face
Rudimentary creatures of flesh and blood, you touch my mind, fumbling in ignorance, incapable of understanding.
He does fit our scheme, though.
Because he’s versatile and actually able to penetrate through an O-line . What this team doesn’t want is a two-down D-lineman who is only an asset against the run and moves east-to-west as he occupies blockers.
Locker-room attitude doesn’t really bother me either, but his inconsistent effort on the field since he got his pay-day certainly does. Let’s be honest; the guy has basically made $60 million over the past two years (and in just 26 games at that). Given how much he seems to care about money, and how little he cares about football, I’m not quite sure why he’d even ever play football again.
You and I think he might fit our scheme
But that’s not the same as Frank Bush and Bill Kollar thinking he fits our scheme.
I'll eliminate you like I eliminate gluten from my diet.
by tehGrindCrusher on Jun 20, 2010 8:43 AM CDT up reply actions
thanks....
but no thanks. getting albert haynesworth is the equivalent of dating a small town high school prom queen with aids. yeah… she’s kinda hot, but in the long run you’re gonna pay for it.
"don't taze me bro!!!!!!!!!!"
http://www.twitter.com/doobieman21
by chrisd21 on Jun 18, 2010 12:34 PM CDT reply actions 1 recs
Haynesworth once called Schaub a p*ssy
Schaub once punced a dude for calling him Schwab…. We’d end up losing Schaub for the season with a broken hand and Haynesworth for a broken vagina.
by Bryan72076 on Jun 18, 2010 2:20 PM CDT reply actions 2 recs
I told you BFD!
Rudimentary creatures of flesh and blood, you touch my mind, fumbling in ignorance, incapable of understanding.
Nice one
Rec’d.
I'll eliminate you like I eliminate gluten from my diet.
by tehGrindCrusher on Jun 20, 2010 8:44 AM CDT up reply actions
At First
I couldn’t believe the number of votes for “At the right price”. There is no right price for him.
But as I read the comments I got to thinking, swallow our hatred, call the tits and find out how they structured Fat Albert’s contract that last year, then carbon copy it.
Even then he gave inconsistent effort though; took plays off….while still on the field.
Just my $.02
Even duct tape can't fix stupid
I question the fanhood
of anyone who voted yes to that fat lazy piece of shit. Drown yourself in a tub of Zima and skittles.
Be judgmental about the actions of the past, be hopeful about the actions of the future. -The Homers Creed
Welcome back, daGoat!
I suppose if all of the stars, moons and planets align it could be possible, but what are the chances of that?
I would rather
Watch a homeless man play a banjo with his tool than see Haynesworth in a Texans uni.
"How bout that ride in. I guess that's why they call it sin city."
by AFTexan on Jun 19, 2010 2:15 PM CDT reply actions 5 recs
So you're headed to Nashville?
"MDC: Droppin' knowledge like a librarian with Parkinson's." --Jonathan Loesche
by MDC on Jun 19, 2010 7:31 PM CDT up reply actions 6 recs
...or Paris?
Replace banjo with accordion and I witnessed said event on the Metro.
380 pounds of pure pirogi
I'd probably be ok with him from a personality standpoint
But I really wonder if his best days are behind him. I’m not convinced he’ll ever be as dominant as he was with the Tits.
I'll eliminate you like I eliminate gluten from my diet.
by tehGrindCrusher on Jun 20, 2010 8:45 AM CDT reply actions

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