Battle Red Link Roundup: Chicken Little Asomugha Edition
As has become usual in our 24/7 news cycle, sometimes all you need to do to become a quoted source is have tenure, regardless of how few stories you actually break. Thus, making the rounds yesterday was the "story" that Lil Dickie Justice, Age 12's "source" thinks that Nnamdi Asomugha doesn't have any interest in playing for the Texans. Nnamdi probably shouldn't have any interest in being a Texan unless they outbid everyone for his services--that doesn't mean that LDJA12's anonymously sourced throwaway line needs to become a national story.
--Paul Kuharsky looks at the AFC South's sophomore jump candidates, and concludes that Earl Mitchell has the opportunity to fulfill that promise. Personally, I'd rather he eat enough that he can't jump.
--Fourth rounder Roc Carmichael is the subject of not one, but two pieces. A full feature in The Washington Post and a podcast done over at The Mothership. Unfortunately, we didn't learn why bappin' isn't easy. CBS Sports' Rob Rang likes all three of the defensive backs the Texans picked in the draft to be good fits.
--Mario Williams was ranked as the 71st best player in the NFL by his peers in The NFL Network's Top 100. He's probably more talented than that ranking, but I can understand it, given the injuries and poor defenses he dealt with last season.
--Pro Football Focus published a list of safeties that looks at missed tackles. Both the good and the bad. Ex-Texan C.C. Brown led the league by missing a tackle every 4.5 attempts. I can only guess that Eugene Wilson was not close enough to any players last year to attempt tackles per PFF's system.
--John McClain is daydreaming about what Texans OTAs would look like, if the Texans were having them. Poor Cal McNair and his inheritance! I'm crushed that he hypothetically lost it!
--McClain also talked to a pair of frustrated Texans in Eric Winston and Joel Dreessen. Reminder to players (and owners, for that matter): Nobody cares about your PR battle but you. If you're not going to work it out without court proceedings, kindly shut up. Peter King also talked to Winston about those pesky players and their lack of self-control.
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Are you the keymaster?
- Rivers McCown, From Mom's Basement | Twitter | SB Nation Houston | Battle Red Blog
by riversmccown on May 18, 2011 9:19 AM CDT up reply actions
The word "wrong" just doesn't begin to cover it.
"In conclusion, I’d like to say that Dicky Justice is an assclown."
"...your in-house hirings on the defensive side suck donkey balls..."
- tehGrindCrusher
Not even
My name is Barry - I am from Texas
by Barryfromtexas on May 20, 2011 9:42 PM CDT up reply actions
And to think he's still making money today
Dude apparently knew how to save & invest his money right
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on May 20, 2011 11:47 PM CDT up reply actions
I think it should be noted that I was not the one to post that pic!
I didn't do anything wrong!.... and, I won't do it again.
Another good link: 2010 Texans - What the Film Revealed
NY Times Football Blog
http://fifthdown.blogs.nytimes.com/2011/05/15/2010-texans-what-the-film-revealed/
by La Voz on May 18, 2011 9:32 AM CDT reply actions 1 recs
If the film revealed that Eric Winston had his best year
I question the eyes of the viewer.
- Rivers McCown, From Mom's Basement | Twitter | SB Nation Houston | Battle Red Blog
by riversmccown on May 18, 2011 9:45 AM CDT up reply actions 3 recs
I thought he had his worst year
He was ok as a run blocker, but terrible as a pas blocker if I remember correctly.
And by the way, Dirk has been and always will be a little bitch who likes david hasselhoff and cant satisfy his wife.
the Dirk that went off for 44
"////let it pan out before you kick da plan out\"
-mitmil22
by theSpaceCityKid on May 18, 2011 10:39 AM CDT up reply actions
At last, a clue for those of us that hate basketball and baseball...
"In conclusion, I’d like to say that Dicky Justice is an assclown."
"...your in-house hirings on the defensive side suck donkey balls..."
- tehGrindCrusher
GOD I HATE DIRK
The prick can’t miss a shot and no matter what any type of contact received the official calls a foul…I’m waiting for nick collison to knock one of the officials out…
1017
by TexanZ 1017 on May 18, 2011 11:27 AM CDT up reply actions
w o w...
"In conclusion, I’d like to say that Dicky Justice is an assclown."
"...your in-house hirings on the defensive side suck donkey balls..."
- tehGrindCrusher
I wasn't able to read further down...
…still giggly-in-love with the Adrian Peterson lite comparison for Arian Foster.
Unless you bring up AP's butterfinger problems
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on May 18, 2011 12:18 PM CDT up reply actions
i do love me some adrian peterson
possibly one of my favorite celebs on earth, and a genuinely nice person
and the intellect of Mike Tyson
"In conclusion, I’d like to say that Dicky Justice is an assclown."
"...your in-house hirings on the defensive side suck donkey balls..."
- tehGrindCrusher
hey, Mike Tyson is VERY intelligent...
we just don’t take his intelligence seriously due to his Mickey Mouse voice
and street-fighting is frowned on by our society
I didn't do anything wrong!.... and, I won't do it again.
there's a whole nother society outside the walls of BRB?
I didn't do anything wrong!.... and, I won't do it again.
I heard that fairy tale before too, so I went outside to try and find it
That sun thing was just too bright though, so I turned right around and went back to the basement.
"If my hips had pockets, I wouldn't wear pants at all." @NotBurtReynolds
I don't mean just his fumbles
Sometimes he slips up on his tweets
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on May 18, 2011 1:49 PM CDT up reply actions
I don't know about you...
But Mclain’s little day dream sounds like an amazing day dream to me. Even IF the scrabble part didn’t happen
UT is probably a given for one spot
there’s likely a lot of applications to sift through, and then much deliberation going on among the staff
boy, l’d love to be a fly on that wall…
I don't know about that first part.
As much as I’d like to believe it, I’d just as soon not take anything as a given.
I am a visionary, I am a genius, and now I am angry! Now help me find my pants!
Oklahoma City Plunder delenda est.
by UprootedTexan on May 18, 2011 10:38 AM CDT up reply actions
you're the odds-on favorite among the community, though
don’t get your hopes up though, you wouldn’t want to be dissapointed…
There's a lot of good writers out there though.
And I’m very superstitious about even just talking about it.
I am a visionary, I am a genius, and now I am angry! Now help me find my pants!
Oklahoma City Plunder delenda est.
by UprootedTexan on May 18, 2011 10:59 AM CDT up reply actions
Thank you. I appreciate that.
I am a visionary, I am a genius, and now I am angry! Now help me find my pants!
Oklahoma City Plunder delenda est.
by UprootedTexan on May 18, 2011 11:01 AM CDT up reply actions
So if we keep talking about it, you're going to get more and more uneasy?
Is that what I’m hearing there, feline Overlord?
"In conclusion, I’d like to say that Dicky Justice is an assclown."
"...your in-house hirings on the defensive side suck donkey balls..."
- tehGrindCrusher
A little.
But I get really uneasy if I talk about it.
I am a visionary, I am a genius, and now I am angry! Now help me find my pants!
Oklahoma City Plunder delenda est.
by UprootedTexan on May 18, 2011 11:22 AM CDT up reply actions
Oh... So...
If we were to say things like:
There is NO POSSIBLE WAY that Tim could EVER not select you as one of the writers.
or
It would just be an UNpossible outcome for you to not be selected.
or
This guy has NEVER missed an extra point… (sorry wrong context…)
Everyone KNOWS that UprootedTexan is one of the picks…
…that wouldn’t bother you, right… Not nervous at all about implied jinxes, etc…?
"In conclusion, I’d like to say that Dicky Justice is an assclown."
"...your in-house hirings on the defensive side suck donkey balls..."
- tehGrindCrusher
::Twitch, twitch::
Okay, you can stop now.
I am a visionary, I am a genius, and now I am angry! Now help me find my pants!
Oklahoma City Plunder delenda est.
by UprootedTexan on May 18, 2011 11:29 AM CDT up reply actions
/laughing
You crack me up… Seriously, I’m looking forward to your officiality… You have a great twisted mind and an obviously very special and understanding wife. I am praying for a full recovery for her so that she can have the strength to continue to sneak up behind you and catch you looking at something we’ve posted that will get you in trouble.
All the best.
"In conclusion, I’d like to say that Dicky Justice is an assclown."
"...your in-house hirings on the defensive side suck donkey balls..."
- tehGrindCrusher
Oh she's already fully recovered.
The only trouble she’s having is she’s a little itchy from the burns left by the cathodes, but otherwise all’s well. And thank you for your thoughts and prayers.
I am a visionary, I am a genius, and now I am angry! Now help me find my pants!
Oklahoma City Plunder delenda est.
by UprootedTexan on May 18, 2011 11:37 AM CDT up reply actions
That's a backhanded compliment.
Canal Street Chronicles-A place of great Saints news and information. Oh and the stuff I write!
good point
“You’re the smartest freshman at A&M!”
"In conclusion, I’d like to say that Dicky Justice is an assclown."
"...your in-house hirings on the defensive side suck donkey balls..."
- tehGrindCrusher
by DilloTex on May 18, 2011 11:54 AM CDT up reply actions 4 recs
You're the best defensive back the Texans have!
"In conclusion, I’d like to say that Dicky Justice is an assclown."
"...your in-house hirings on the defensive side suck donkey balls..."
- tehGrindCrusher
by DilloTex on May 18, 2011 11:55 AM CDT up reply actions 4 recs
You're the most honest politician I've ever known!
You’re the most literate BESF I’ve ever met!
You’re the most mannerly Cowgirls fan I’ve ever met!
"In conclusion, I’d like to say that Dicky Justice is an assclown."
"...your in-house hirings on the defensive side suck donkey balls..."
- tehGrindCrusher
by DilloTex on May 18, 2011 11:56 AM CDT up reply actions 4 recs
You're the prettiest girl in Oklahoma.
Canal Street Chronicles-A place of great Saints news and information. Oh and the stuff I write!
by Jon Banks on May 18, 2011 12:15 PM CDT up reply actions 4 recs
She's too sexy for her coat:

Canal Street Chronicles-A place of great Saints news and information. Oh and the stuff I write!
by Jon Banks on May 18, 2011 12:16 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
MMMM... mutton...
Simply b-ewe-tiful…
"In conclusion, I’d like to say that Dicky Justice is an assclown."
"...your in-house hirings on the defensive side suck donkey balls..."
- tehGrindCrusher
by DilloTex on May 18, 2011 1:52 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
Baaaaaaadddd pun Dillo
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on May 18, 2011 1:56 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
I know, I'm embarrassed...
…downright sheepish. I appreciate you not telling me to flock off for my ram-pant foolishness. I kid, I kid…
"In conclusion, I’d like to say that Dicky Justice is an assclown."
"...your in-house hirings on the defensive side suck donkey balls..."
- tehGrindCrusher
by DilloTex on May 18, 2011 2:12 PM CDT up reply actions 5 recs
Thank ewe...
"In conclusion, I’d like to say that Dicky Justice is an assclown."
"...your in-house hirings on the defensive side suck donkey balls..."
- tehGrindCrusher
Any more sheep puns and there'll be so many people
Ready to whack you with a newspaper that you’ll have to live the rest of your life on the lamb.
I am a visionary, I am a genius, and now I am angry! Now help me find my pants!
Oklahoma City Plunder delenda est.
by UprootedTexan on May 18, 2011 2:46 PM CDT up reply actions
Somebody needs to be PUNnished so this will stopp
"If my hips had pockets, I wouldn't wear pants at all." @NotBurtReynolds
I woold stop...
…because I’m concerned about damaging our relationsheep, but I’m shear we’ll get through it.
"In conclusion, I’d like to say that Dicky Justice is an assclown."
"...your in-house hirings on the defensive side suck donkey balls..."
- tehGrindCrusher
...and that newspaper is no joking matter, mister...
"In conclusion, I’d like to say that Dicky Justice is an assclown."
"...your in-house hirings on the defensive side suck donkey balls..."
- tehGrindCrusher
This is as close to a pertinent segue I will ever have to post this video, so here we go.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YJlk3b9Kws4
- Rivers McCown, From Mom's Basement | Twitter | SB Nation Houston | Battle Red Blog
by riversmccown on May 18, 2011 10:47 AM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
Legit LOL
Canal Street Chronicles-A place of great Saints news and information. Oh and the stuff I write!
All we have to do is give up some of Cal McNair's inheritance?
Shoot, any Nnamdi poll now better be at 100% from now on.
"Lord, beer me strength."
I'll be happy if he doesn't move the team to Oklahoma or something.
I am a visionary, I am a genius, and now I am angry! Now help me find my pants!
Oklahoma City Plunder delenda est.
by UprootedTexan on May 18, 2011 10:38 AM CDT up reply actions
Bah
They already have a team, the Cowgirls.
And Keith-- darn it, change your name! It's not scary, and I'm embarassed to say it. Boris, Try that. Keith, you know, OH, watch out for KEITH!
by Chris Rosenberger on May 18, 2011 12:10 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
Congratulations
On linking to a story about Dickie Justice but not actually linking to Dickie Justice.
Needs more nose tackle.
Actually that's pretty sad
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on May 18, 2011 1:50 PM CDT up reply actions
I was both happy and sad that I could
If that makes sense.
- Rivers McCown, From Mom's Basement | Twitter | SB Nation Houston | Battle Red Blog
by riversmccown on May 18, 2011 2:36 PM CDT up reply actions
I can only hope that one day
We’ll link to his last article
"Lord, beer me strength."
by TexansDC on May 18, 2011 3:51 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
We are soooo on the same wavelength
Nick Fairley aside, the whole “shoot for the stars” attitude, and now this, reminds me of times gone by…
Blind fandom is all I got left.
That must be
Rock bottom for a link aggregator. Just a hop skip and a jump away from search optimizing filipino tranny porn.
Needs more nose tackle.
Didn't Little Dicky cover his butt?
By writing stories both ways.
My name is Barry - I am from Texas

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