And Some Readers Have Greatness Thrust Upon Them: Introducing the Bag
by MDC on May 20, 2011 11:42 AM CDT
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Have you ever thought to yourself, "Self, I would really like to be a more active participant in the BRB community, but I cannot be bothered to write FanShots or apply to be one of the new writers or anything like that; what should I do?"
Sadly, if you found yourself in that predicament, your options were limited to (1) commenting more frequently, (2) having access to free beer and inviting the BRB staff/readership to hang out, (3) crying yourself to sleep at night.
Well dry those tears, Sally, because I have some great news. How great? So great that you have to hit the jump to even read about it.
[Note: The author, the management, and SBN make no guarantees that this news will, in fact, strike you as "great" or even strike you as something better than "a terrible idea."
We are launching a weekly mailbag, which is currently, tentatively named "Battle Red Bag." [Here is where I would explain how mailbags work if I didn't think that you all were smart enough to figure that part out on your own.]
Is that little voice in your head asking, "Who the hell would want to ask questions about the Texans every week? Isn't answering what questions a blog wants answered the purpose of the actual blog articles?" The voice raises a good point. We've thought about that. So, instead of merely having Texans-related questions in the bag, it will be open to more or less any topic.
No, seriously, you can e-mail about anything: beer, women, college course schedules, why Cookie Crisp is indisputably the best breakfast cereal (it is!), clarification of weightspeed calculations, rants about Amobi Okoye, paeans to Amobi Okoye, why Tim secretly loves Amobi Okoye, movies, music, bar-b-que, relationship advice (I have no idea why you would want to do this ), hypothetical legal questions (this mailbag does not create a lawyer-client relationship yada yada yada), or anything else under the Sun.
Hell, you don't even have to e-mail questions only; feel free to e-mail observations as well.
Consider this post the first call for e-mail submissions. Send your electronical mailings to mattycamp@gmail.com, preferably with "Mailbag" in the subject line.
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MDC wouldn't be able to answer that one
"If my hips had pockets, I wouldn't wear pants at all." @NotBurtReynolds
beat me to it.
Capt. Nately: You're a shameful opportunist! What you don't understand is that it's better to die on your feet than to live on your knees.
Old man in whorehouse: You have it backwards. It's better to live on your feet than to die on your knees. I know.
-Catch 22-
Rec'd
Jerk-off.
The Two-Day Hangover @ SBN Houston | Twitter
-
"MDC: Droppin' knowledge like a librarian with Parkinson's." --Jonathan Loesche
-
"Not to completely equate marriage to fandom, but both rely on suspended insanity a bit." --beefy
So this is a cure for writer's block?
:)
My name is Barry - I am from Texas
by Barryfromtexas on May 20, 2011 11:51 AM CDT reply actions 1 recs
If, by "writer's block,"
you mean “writer’s laziness,” then yes. Yes, it is.
The Two-Day Hangover @ SBN Houston | Twitter
-
"MDC: Droppin' knowledge like a librarian with Parkinson's." --Jonathan Loesche
-
"Not to completely equate marriage to fandom, but both rely on suspended insanity a bit." --beefy
by MDC on May 20, 2011 11:54 AM CDT up reply actions 3 recs
Rec'd
You just had to beat the “new guys” to it :)
My name is Barry - I am from Texas
by Barryfromtexas on May 20, 2011 11:57 AM CDT up reply actions
Nice tags.
Nice pic.
Capt. Nately: You're a shameful opportunist! What you don't understand is that it's better to die on your feet than to live on your knees.
Old man in whorehouse: You have it backwards. It's better to live on your feet than to die on your knees. I know.
-Catch 22-
That dunk last night had a serious awsomeness factor to it
hence the automatic technical for describing it in great detail to the earthbound mavs
It took the Astros 44 years to get to the Series, the Oilers-Texans are due to get to the big dance...Go Texans!!!!!
by oiler-texan diehard on May 20, 2011 12:30 PM CDT up reply actions
I never read the tags...
And this proves that I really REALLY should.
Bacon tastes good... Pork chops taste good.
He really should've bet more than $5
If the Treasury Secretary doesn't have to pay taxes, then why do I?
Or a case of beer.
Capt. Nately: You're a shameful opportunist! What you don't understand is that it's better to die on your feet than to live on your knees.
Old man in whorehouse: You have it backwards. It's better to live on your feet than to die on your knees. I know.
-Catch 22-
I have a question.
Why in Durga’s name did you post a picture of THAT team?
That’s just uncalled for.
Despite my better judgment, an author at Battle Red Blog.
Supreme Galactic Editor of Battle Red Onion.
I am a visionary, I am a genius, and now I am angry! Now where are those pants at?!
I wouldn
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on May 20, 2011 12:11 PM CDT up reply actions
I wouldn't exactly say that
I think plenty of people called for it
/BTW, accidently hit enter beforehand
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on May 20, 2011 12:12 PM CDT up reply actions
If there's one thing I think everyone needs
It’s MOAR DURANT!!!
by LouisianaTexan on May 20, 2011 12:16 PM CDT via mobile up reply actions
How about a Durantula?
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on May 20, 2011 12:17 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
If only
Aldridge wouldve stayed 1 more year to play with Durant. What might have been….
by LouisianaTexan on May 20, 2011 12:40 PM CDT via mobile up reply actions
Night Owl, I'm stealing your picture to upload it to my Photobucket.
lol – this is TOO FUNNY!
/AND I will probably repost it to the OT’s
"My idea of an agreeable person is a person who agrees with me." -- Benjamin Disraeli
"If you really want something in life you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers." -- Homer Simpson
"There is no rehab for stupid." -- Chris Rock
Never try to baptize a cat.
So when are you gonna give me access to your "bucket'?
/.wink wink
Capt. Nately: You're a shameful opportunist! What you don't understand is that it's better to die on your feet than to live on your knees.
Old man in whorehouse: You have it backwards. It's better to live on your feet than to die on your knees. I know.
-Catch 22-
BACK OFF!
If you think of yourselves as helpless and ineffectual, it is certain that you will create a despotic government to be your master. The wise despot, therefore, maintains among his subjects a popular sense that they are helpless and ineffectual.
-Frank Herbert, The Dosadi Experiment
by peytonsurdaddy on May 21, 2011 9:29 AM CDT up reply actions
It's a pretty good sandwich from what I've seen
Pulled Pork, Bacon, & Drunken Crab Legs (on what looks like a wheat bun) with Smoked Cheddar being optional.
You think that looks good, you should see William “The Refrigerator” Perry
Housemade Onion & Sage Waffles, Buttermilk Fried Chicken, Applewood Smoked Bacon…topped with Spicy Maple Mayo. Served with Waffle Fries & an extra side of Spicy Maple Mayo.
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on May 21, 2011 12:01 AM CDT up reply actions
Kill it! Kill it with fire!
Despite my better judgment, an author at Battle Red Blog.
Supreme Galactic Editor of Battle Red Onion.
I am a visionary, I am a genius, and now I am angry! Now where are those pants at?!
by UprootedTexan on May 20, 2011 9:03 PM CDT up reply actions
No, you must eat it to make it go away
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on May 21, 2011 12:02 AM CDT up reply actions
..........
Which team are you referring too UT?
Self declared Texans fan,and by no means am I joking
by TexanZ 1017 on May 20, 2011 12:27 PM CDT up reply actions
The team formerly known as the SuperSonics
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on May 20, 2011 12:28 PM CDT up reply actions
r u jokin me?
Self declared Texans fan,and by no means am I joking
by TexanZ 1017 on May 20, 2011 12:37 PM CDT up reply actions
No, UT lives in Seattle
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on May 20, 2011 12:38 PM CDT up reply actions
So, will the answer to all of these be 42?
And also, where’s Ivan?
But i figure that this is the only reason i'm missed
is the enforcement of BRB Section 807.92 thread regulation code
by Ivan A on May 20, 2011 1:58 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
Excuse me
Fellas but is it just me or does Ivan have quite the collection of women on his computer?
Self declared Texans fan,and by no means am I joking
I
enjoy them to the fullest my friend…To the fullest
Self declared Texans fan,and by no means am I joking
I'm sure he's sticking alright...
zing
-- "...I was sick, napping, and then woke up and came to the computer to read a note from the Gingered Angel of Doom..." Martek - Dynamo Theory Blog
He sure does
and Batman eating a cookie apparently
Probably soon to be changed to BRB Section 8008.5(d) thread regulation code
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on May 21, 2011 12:04 AM CDT up reply actions
Have a friend who dated this girl's brother.
She’s some sorta Youtube celebrity. Apparently nice enough IRL.
- Rivers McCown, From Mom's Basement | Twitter | SB Nation Houston | Battle Red Blog
by riversmccown on May 20, 2011 4:46 PM CDT up reply actions
Pancakes
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on May 21, 2011 12:05 AM CDT up reply actions
underage
Chris Hansen told me so.
Capt. Nately: You're a shameful opportunist! What you don't understand is that it's better to die on your feet than to live on your knees.
Old man in whorehouse: You have it backwards. It's better to live on your feet than to die on your knees. I know.
-Catch 22-
In other sad news today, "Macho Man" Randy Savage died today
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
Noooooo!!
He was my idol as a 7 year old. Sad news indeed.
\pours out bleach cocktail for “Bonesaw”
by LouisianaTexan on May 20, 2011 12:27 PM CDT via mobile up reply actions
For one week my friends and I did his voice....I could barely talk by the end of it.
Never cared for wrestling though, sad to see someone go though.
We are all important to each other, and because of this we have a purpose. - Daniel Black (Yes, that's me)
I recommend that we all listen to his rap album today to honor him.
It’s preeeeetty awesome. Granted, it’s not as good as Hulk Hogan’s CD, which features the love song, “Hulk’s the one”, but it’s still strong.
None of those albums
could possibly compare to Shaq Diesel
If the Treasury Secretary doesn't have to pay taxes, then why do I?
dude this is horrible
i always thought they owuld bring back his sunglasses
"////let it pan out before you kick da plan out\\"
-mitmil22
by theSpaceCityKid on May 20, 2011 3:30 PM CDT up reply actions
I just wonder if Vince and him ever talked after that big split?
I have been saying for years why have they not put him in the WWE hall of fame? It is sad that i think he will go into this years only because he passed, which is sad cause he should have been in a long time ago. R.I.P. Macho you where one of the best.
by southpaw70 on May 20, 2011 5:14 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
Mr. Mailbag, wondering
Does this post, grasping for ideas for posts, count towards the two per week standard?….
I didn't do anything wrong!.... and, I won't do it again.
by Rip Jersey on May 20, 2011 12:44 PM CDT reply actions 3 recs
I know deep down you like men
by AllenOU on May 20, 2011 1:15 PM CDT via mobile up reply actions 2 recs
There's a 2-per-week standard?
When did we start that? I must’ve gotten grandfathered in under the old “is Matt ever going to post anything?” standard.
The Two-Day Hangover @ SBN Houston | Twitter
-
"MDC: Droppin' knowledge like a librarian with Parkinson's." --Jonathan Loesche
-
"Not to completely equate marriage to fandom, but both rely on suspended insanity a bit." --beefy
Just for the newbies I thought
Cause one post a MONTH from kerns is MORE THAN enough
by AllenOU on May 20, 2011 1:34 PM CDT via mobile up reply actions
Actually, I'm interested to see how this turns out
I’ve had some questions before and never really knew what to do with them; post them as off-topic was sometimes the answer, write your own fan-post is always an option, but this is a good idea because sometimes to get a better response to a question, to have a featured writer turned it into a featured post should get it answered every which way.
I didn't do anything wrong!.... and, I won't do it again.
I for one would like to know what our Texans are doing during the lockout?
Going to cockfights?
Enjoying the theater?
Beating up red headed midgets?
Finding mittens lost mitten?
Learning how to cut hair?
For the third one...
Look for “Behind The Mask – Andre Johnson”
I’d link it myself, but I can’t get to a computer and it doesn’t work when I try to create links on my iPad.
Despite my better judgment, an author at Battle Red Blog.
Supreme Galactic Editor of Battle Red Onion.
I am a visionary, I am a genius, and now I am angry! Now where are those pants at?!
by UprootedTexan on May 20, 2011 2:05 PM CDT up reply actions
Better than the previous
“is Matt still alive” standard IMO
Capt. Nately: You're a shameful opportunist! What you don't understand is that it's better to die on your feet than to live on your knees.
Old man in whorehouse: You have it backwards. It's better to live on your feet than to die on your knees. I know.
-Catch 22-
I am 12 years old and what is sex?
We are all important to each other, and because of this we have a purpose. - Daniel Black (Yes, that's me)
Use your friendly internet and look up
Panda Suits, BFD, Jordann, Rhonda, Travis Johnson.
You can thank me later
"It was like the Alamo!"
I am not responsible for kids turning into furries when they grow up.
Capt. Nately: You're a shameful opportunist! What you don't understand is that it's better to die on your feet than to live on your knees.
Old man in whorehouse: You have it backwards. It's better to live on your feet than to die on your knees. I know.
-Catch 22-
The UN will eventually hold you on trial for crimes to humanity.
You’ve taken away so many childhoods
"It was like the Alamo!"
Dear MDC,
Do we know you?
A Texans fan. Really. No, I'm not kidding.
http://www.battleredblog.com
"Blind fandom is all I got left." - LoneSpot
by bigfatdrunk on May 20, 2011 2:45 PM CDT reply actions 3 recs
You shouldn't be talking!
Capt. Nately: You're a shameful opportunist! What you don't understand is that it's better to die on your feet than to live on your knees.
Old man in whorehouse: You have it backwards. It's better to live on your feet than to die on your knees. I know.
-Catch 22-
I know your sister.
In the biblical sense.
By which I mean, we read the bible together and prayed for your soul.
The Two-Day Hangover @ SBN Houston | Twitter
-
"MDC: Droppin' knowledge like a librarian with Parkinson's." --Jonathan Loesche
-
"Not to completely equate marriage to fandom, but both rely on suspended insanity a bit." --beefy
by MDC on May 22, 2011 7:04 PM CDT up reply actions 3 recs
Hippies have souls?
Capt. Nately: You're a shameful opportunist! What you don't understand is that it's better to die on your feet than to live on your knees.
Old man in whorehouse: You have it backwards. It's better to live on your feet than to die on your knees. I know.
-Catch 22-
Helping you to win the $5 bet:
How did you convince God to send the tornadoes to Alabama this year, instead of Arkansas?
If the Treasury Secretary doesn't have to pay taxes, then why do I?
Im assuming he sacrificed a whole cow using thurgood.
Capt. Nately: You're a shameful opportunist! What you don't understand is that it's better to die on your feet than to live on your knees.
Old man in whorehouse: You have it backwards. It's better to live on your feet than to die on your knees. I know.
-Catch 22-
Looks like you spoke too soon. I see they hit Arkansas last night...
"My idea of an agreeable person is a person who agrees with me." -- Benjamin Disraeli
"If you really want something in life you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers." -- Homer Simpson
"There is no rehab for stupid." -- Chris Rock
Never try to baptize a cat.
BTW
Capt. Nately: You're a shameful opportunist! What you don't understand is that it's better to die on your feet than to live on your knees.
Old man in whorehouse: You have it backwards. It's better to live on your feet than to die on your knees. I know.
-Catch 22-
reply fail.
I don’t even remember my reply anymore.
Capt. Nately: You're a shameful opportunist! What you don't understand is that it's better to die on your feet than to live on your knees.
Old man in whorehouse: You have it backwards. It's better to live on your feet than to die on your knees. I know.
-Catch 22-
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