From 90 To 80: Cuttin' Heads Like Eugene Martone
At some point today or tomorrow, your Houston Texans are going to trim ten names from the roster to bring the number of players to 80. (The other 27 cuts must be made by September 3rd.) Being that this is a pretty small round of cuts, relatively speaking, I don't anticipate much in the way of surprise. Still, I figured I'd take a stab at the 10 guys that I think will find a red flag in their lockers in the near future.
First, a few premises that I am working under.
1. With the o-line injuries, I think the benefit of the doubt will be given to as many linemen as possible and, where it's close between an OL and a player at a different position, the OL will survive.
2. Some guys are going to be kept just to be fodder for the fourth preseason game, with no chance of actually making the team.
3. No players taken in the 2011 Draft will be cut.
After the jump, my predictions.
Scott Albritton, LS. Yes, he's a rookie. Yes, he went to Colorado State, but Jon Weeks is going to get the LS job, and trimming a body here is pretty much a no-brainer when you've got other positions where you'd like to keep as many as possible through next Sunday.
Mister Alexander, ILB. I don't feel like this needs much explanation. He's been inactive for all three games and, thus, has one less tackle than does Scott Albritton. So long, Mr. Mister.
Antonio Baker, SS. Who? Exactly.
John Graves, DE. I went to high school with a kid named John Graves. He drove a pink Chevy Cavalier ("Damn it, you guys, it's LAZER RED!" "Whatever, dude.") This is not that John Graves. They do have one thing in common, though: neither one will make the 2011 Texans' roster.
Peter Hendrickson, OT. This is the one I'm most hesitant about on the list. If the team decides to IR Kasey Studdard as a roster move, i think Hendrickson sticks around another week. If not, he's my tenth pick.
Trindon Holliday, KR. With the logjam at WR and the fact that Kubiak did not mention Trindon when discussing kick/punt returners the other day, I think the writing is on the wall. It says "You must be this tall to be a Texan," and Toro is holding out a hoof that's about three inches above Holliday's head.
Matt Marcorelle, ILB. Non-factor who comes from a school that wasn't creative enough to come up with their own helmet design, so they just ripped off the best helmet in college football.
Maurice Rolle, FS. Rolle was active and saw the field in preseason week 1, but did not contribute appreciably. He was active in weeks 2 and 3, but did not get in the game. I see a trend.
Paul Williams, WR. Saturday was the first time he's been on the active roster. He was not targeted.
Torri Williams, FS. Active in all three contests, he's totaled 0.5 tackles. Doesn't exactly scream "KEEP ME!" That said, if they decide to cut Javarris Williams and let Steve Slaton and Chris Ogbonnaya battle it out Sunday, I could see Williams being kept.
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MAURICE ROLLE SUX I TOLD YOU GUYS WE SHOULD HAVE DRAFTED MYRON
rabble rabble rabble
- Rivers McCown, From Mom's Basement | Twitter | Football Outsiders | Battle Red Blog
I'd keep Maurice
if we could agree that Steve Miller Band jokes about him were off-limits.
The Two-Day Hangover @ SBN Houston | Twitter
"Cuz I speak as a of luuuuv..."
You know that won’t happen…
"Suck it, Jim Tressel, you filthy, cheating, unfashionable piece of monkey scrotum."
- MDC
"Let’s leave all the football talk to knowledgeable experts who have played the game, like Matt Millen and Emmitt Smith."
-tehGrindCrusher
Damn angle brackets...
[mumble-mumble (prophetess?)]…
"Suck it, Jim Tressel, you filthy, cheating, unfashionable piece of monkey scrotum."
- MDC
"Let’s leave all the football talk to knowledgeable experts who have played the game, like Matt Millen and Emmitt Smith."
-tehGrindCrusher
Wow... I had no idea...
Enlightening and yet somehow frustrating at the same time…
"Suck it, Jim Tressel, you filthy, cheating, unfashionable piece of monkey scrotum."
- MDC
"Let’s leave all the football talk to knowledgeable experts who have played the game, like Matt Millen and Emmitt Smith."
-tehGrindCrusher
lulz
I keep that song in the repertoire just for that
Mario Williams will have 4 sacks and 1 int by Game 4 of the regular season.
by Barryfromtexas on Aug 29, 2011 4:40 PM CDT up reply actions
Correction.
4th string. He’s way down on their depth chart. I saw him late in the 4th quarter of one of their games this preseason.
Prediction: 11-5 AFC South champions.
Dont think hendrickson is gone just yet.
Graves will still be here for the time being. I think george teauge is going to be let go, and also cheta.
no because if it was
i’d be playing madden 12 :)
Thank God for football!
by BattleRedHusker on Aug 29, 2011 2:09 PM CDT up reply actions
I'm picking up a copy first thing in the morning
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on Aug 29, 2011 11:18 PM CDT up reply actions
got it
yet to play it…. stupid job and responsibilities. The always get in the way!
2011 Crystal Ball
Dorin Dickerson coming out party
Damn you, Peyton Manning. You fucked me more times than I can remember, but now you've crossed the line when you fucked me in fantasy. REDRUM, Peyton Manning... REDRUM.
by BRBUSAFTexan on Aug 29, 2011 11:56 PM CDT up reply actions
Yeah
I went back and forth on Hendrickson for quite a while.
I assume you mean Jason Teague? He’s got good size, and CB seems like another position where they’ll keep as many bodies as possible until the very end.
Cheta very well could be, but I think he’ll get cut Sunday instead.
The Two-Day Hangover @ SBN Houston | Twitter
The Texans can't cut the cheese!
They just can’t!
I'd replace Paul Williams with someone else.
We are still looking for those last two WR spots to fill and he’d be another body at WR to look at. Especially if Jean doesn’t get healthy.
I’d say Teague or Molden are gone since Kubiak has said Roc should be back playing this week.
Prediction: 11-5 AFC South champions.
Possible
Williams has just been such a non-factor that it’s not like he’ll sneak into that last WR slot, and I assume that the coaches will give the guys who DO have a shot at that slot a lot of reps Sunday.
The Two-Day Hangover @ SBN Houston | Twitter
Oh I don't think he'll win a roster spot.
But Kubiak has maintained that those two spots are wide open and to be honest besides Lestar’s two nice catches in the Jets game nobody has really seemed to fill that spot. Jeff has been on the field a lot but he only has one catch for 5 yards at this point.
Toliver wasn’t inactive for the 49ers game but I didn’t see him anywhere and he’s been a non-factor. Even on ST. Dorin dropped a tough catch in that game as well and has only one little 13 yard grab at this point.
Besides Darling I’ve seen nothing from anybody else. Paul was hurt for a bit so I see Kubiak giving him at least a look in the last game.
Prediction: 11-5 AFC South champions.
I still think he is.
But this Bryant Johnson thing is … interesting.
The Two-Day Hangover @ SBN Houston | Twitter
I'm to lazy to make a fanshot
but Arian Foster just ripped off Collin Cowherds head and crapped down the hole.
After Cowherd tweeted, “’We really do care about you as a human too. Um,now about that hammy? —signed, everybody,” Foster came back with this:

dayyyummmmmm lol Arian really doesn’t give a shit about fantasy football!
Thank God for football!
by BattleRedHusker on Aug 29, 2011 1:59 PM CDT reply actions
also P8N has been taken off PUP list
otherwise he’d have to sit out til week 6 or w/e the rule is.
Thank God for football!
by BattleRedHusker on Aug 29, 2011 1:59 PM CDT up reply actions
Doesn't necessarily mean he'll play week 1 though.
Despite my better judgment, a manager at Battle Red Blog.
Supreme Galactic Editor of Battle Red Onion.
I am a visionary, I am a genius, and now I am angry! Now where are those pants at?!
Football is war by other means. - Carl von Clausewitz...sorta.
by UprootedTexan on Aug 29, 2011 2:00 PM CDT up reply actions
yea. it was just semi-relevant
Thank God for football!
by BattleRedHusker on Aug 29, 2011 2:03 PM CDT up reply actions
Playing devil's advocate ...
I think the Colts/P8un would be idiotic imbecilic moronic dumbasses if he did play in week 1. With the way our defense has been getting to quarterbacks (and not just the backups) why would they put their entire franchise’s hope at risk with no practice time and probably not 100%. Everyone knows without the 4head, the Dolts have no chance of going anywhere this season. Because of this I don’t see any way he plays week 1. I don’t think he plays until week 3 at the earliest. If he does play I see a very good chance he could be lost for the season. If that happens Texans get first win ever in Indy – bank on it.
just figured out why everyone calls him 5head.
/facepalm
//me stoopid
"Rommel, you magnificent bast***, I read your book!" - George S. Patton
by chilam balam on Aug 29, 2011 8:01 PM CDT up reply actions
Damn I meant to say 5head as is correct ...
in too much of a hurry and called him 4head instead. That’s it 5head – no more freebies.
Sure it does.
Someone educate me a little. Is 5head 100% in control of whether he plays or not or do the Dolts coaching/management/ownership have some or all of this decision responsibility?
Most likely Manning will decide if he can play or not
If he says he can play and the FO/Coaches don’t let him play, well….. good luck with that.
I didn't do anything wrong!.... and, I won't do it again.
Ok if it's up to Manning ...
then I believe his forehead ego will cause him to go ahead and start as long as he is able to crawl walk onto the field. I’m not worried either way. Texans beat Colts – 34-16.
Ha saw that yesterday when I was going over his posts on twitter.
Prediction: 11-5 AFC South champions.
if you ask me, Cowherd didn't deserve it.
granted I don’t listen to his stuff except on sportsnation, but is he really that bad? If i was #23, I woulda saved that shot for Skip Fucking Bayliss
Thank God for football!
by BattleRedHusker on Aug 29, 2011 2:04 PM CDT up reply actions
Yes he is
Ignorant and pompous
2011 Crystal Ball
Dorin Dickerson coming out party
Damn you, Peyton Manning. You fucked me more times than I can remember, but now you've crossed the line when you fucked me in fantasy. REDRUM, Peyton Manning... REDRUM.
by BRBUSAFTexan on Aug 29, 2011 2:06 PM CDT up reply actions
what on God's green earth does that make Skip?
Thank God for football!
by BattleRedHusker on Aug 29, 2011 2:10 PM CDT up reply actions
Pond scum.
Despite my better judgment, a manager at Battle Red Blog.
Supreme Galactic Editor of Battle Red Onion.
I am a visionary, I am a genius, and now I am angry! Now where are those pants at?!
Football is war by other means. - Carl von Clausewitz...sorta.
by UprootedTexan on Aug 29, 2011 2:11 PM CDT up reply actions
I think Skip
was planted by ESPN purely to be the devil’s advocate and create conflict, but admittedly that’s a best case scenario. Though, it’s not so maddening when I watch him now, in this light. Worst case he does believe what he says, and if that’s the case its absurd he’s been given an audience.
On behalf of Pond Scum... really...? Haven't we suffered enough?
"Suck it, Jim Tressel, you filthy, cheating, unfashionable piece of monkey scrotum."
- MDC
"Let’s leave all the football talk to knowledgeable experts who have played the game, like Matt Millen and Emmitt Smith."
-tehGrindCrusher
by DilloTex on Aug 29, 2011 3:26 PM CDT up reply actions 2 recs
lol
/poor pond scum. Never gets a break…
"My idea of an agreeable person is a person who agrees with me." -- Benjamin Disraeli
"If you really want something in life you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers." -- Homer Simpson
"There is no rehab for stupid." -- Chris Rock
Never try to baptize a cat.
The only thing worse than pond scum is
the pond scum troll
I didn't do anything wrong!.... and, I won't do it again.
more like pond sludge
As scum floats on top
Mario Williams will have 4 sacks and 1 int by Game 4 of the regular season.
by Barryfromtexas on Aug 29, 2011 4:45 PM CDT up reply actions
Or Micheal Lombardi.
XX. The soft Texans. I am really excited to see if the Texans can play with physical power and not lose leads in the fourth quarter. If they do, I’ll remove the soft label.
From his list of XLVI things to watch for this season.
Prediction: 11-5 AFC South champions.
caveat
defensive power, ok. I assume he means power running, though.
2011 Crystal Ball
Dorin Dickerson coming out party
Damn you, Peyton Manning. You fucked me more times than I can remember, but now you've crossed the line when you fucked me in fantasy. REDRUM, Peyton Manning... REDRUM.
by BRBUSAFTexan on Aug 29, 2011 2:26 PM CDT up reply actions
No matter what happens...
I won’t remove the “Fat, shitty reporter” label from Michael Lombardi.
"Lord, beer me strength."
that is a slight on
the mentally disabled, how about should have been aborted?
"Taco Joe - the beacon of optimism" TexansDC
"Great, you've doomed us all!" - UprootedTexan
God blessed Texas, but he has forsaken the Texans
I liked what FSRR Lombardi did in the draft programming, but now I have a totally different opinion of the guy
I didn't do anything wrong!.... and, I won't do it again.
Compelling pro-choice argument
"Suck it, Jim Tressel, you filthy, cheating, unfashionable piece of monkey scrotum."
- MDC
"Let’s leave all the football talk to knowledgeable experts who have played the game, like Matt Millen and Emmitt Smith."
-tehGrindCrusher
So, in Lombardi's opinion
it was our lack of physicality that blew those leads? And here I thought it was our inability to cover anyone. I didn’t realize that simply being more physical would have prevented that. I thought it would have just caused more pass interference calls.
What a stupid I am!
Yeah he's really confused with his comments regarding the Texans since he first labeled them soft.
He seems to flop back and forth between calling them weak mentally (which I couldn’t argue with to much because, to be honest, the Texans came up short in a lot of close games the past couple years) but him saying the team is soft physically is simply untrue.
Prediction: 11-5 AFC South champions.
Last year in a nutshell
NYG (a predominantly running oriented team) is passing to run out the clock.
2011 Crystal Ball
Dorin Dickerson coming out party
Damn you, Peyton Manning. You fucked me more times than I can remember, but now you've crossed the line when you fucked me in fantasy. REDRUM, Peyton Manning... REDRUM.
by BRBUSAFTexan on Aug 29, 2011 4:03 PM CDT up reply actions
Well we'll all be on pins and needles waiting for your approval... prick...
[Lombardi… not you Ethan]
/wags
"Suck it, Jim Tressel, you filthy, cheating, unfashionable piece of monkey scrotum."
- MDC
"Let’s leave all the football talk to knowledgeable experts who have played the game, like Matt Millen and Emmitt Smith."
-tehGrindCrusher
It's not going to happen
but I would love to see Trindon at RB. Sproles #2…
2011 Crystal Ball
Dorin Dickerson coming out party
Damn you, Peyton Manning. You fucked me more times than I can remember, but now you've crossed the line when you fucked me in fantasy. REDRUM, Peyton Manning... REDRUM.
They were probably going to experiment with that some.
Of course he’s been hurt almost his entire time here so hard to evaluate that. Which is unfortunate because he could probably out run most defensive players if you could create that match up of him coming out of the backfield like Casey.
Prediction: 11-5 AFC South champions.
He can join the Chargers or Saints
since they seem to like RB’s that are short….
Mario Williams will have 2 sacks and 6 tackles against the 49ers
...and that implode at the end of the season.
"Suck it, Jim Tressel, you filthy, cheating, unfashionable piece of monkey scrotum."
- MDC
"Let’s leave all the football talk to knowledgeable experts who have played the game, like Matt Millen and Emmitt Smith."
-tehGrindCrusher
Amusing stuff.
NickScurfield
Arian Foster on if he’ll play in Wk 1: “That’s the plan.” Also this: “You never know, man. I might not wake up tomorrow.”
Prediction: 11-5 AFC South champions.
The joke is on the rest of the world, lol!
I didn't do anything wrong!.... and, I won't do it again.
In related news, thousands of fantasy football owners have dropped Arian Foster
Over concerns that he may not wake up in time for the beginning of the season. Texans fans have lined up at the door of one Chris Chase with rope and an impaling spike which will be used as retribution for the panic onset by this terrifying news.
Despite my better judgment, a manager at Battle Red Blog.
Supreme Galactic Editor of Battle Red Onion.
I am a visionary, I am a genius, and now I am angry! Now where are those pants at?!
Football is war by other means. - Carl von Clausewitz...sorta.
by UprootedTexan on Aug 29, 2011 4:07 PM CDT up reply actions
Developing.
Despite my better judgment, a manager at Battle Red Blog.
Supreme Galactic Editor of Battle Red Onion.
I am a visionary, I am a genius, and now I am angry! Now where are those pants at?!
Football is war by other means. - Carl von Clausewitz...sorta.
by UprootedTexan on Aug 29, 2011 4:32 PM CDT up reply actions
I'm now going to wash my hands of this twitter "controversy". It's gotten to much attention anyways.
"That’s a part of the game," he said, referring to fantasy football. "The fact that we’re talking about Twitter is amazing to me, but my Tweet got taken out of context. What I was saying that people who value a digital game over a human being’s health is just kind of weird to me. And that’s all that I meant by that, and eople took it as, oh, I don’t care about fantasy football. I think it’s good for the game. It gets people that don’t really watch into it. I’m on my mother’s fantasy football team, so I’ve got to do good.
"It got taken out of context. I love all my fans, and If you’ve been following me on Twitter, you know what kind of person and human being I am and if you know me you know what kind of human being I am. I try to promote peace, man, because that’s what I’m all about."
Prediction: 11-5 AFC South champions.
OT
Over on Dawgs By Nature, they seem to think we wanna or should trade Mario. They are saying we should trade him now since the OLB move isn’t working well so far and he’s gonna be a free agent after this year. I kno he gets talked about alot around here but i think he is doing fine. So what if his stats are a little down right now, we’re winning and i don’t think that will change once the season starts and Wade unleashes his playbook. If anything Mario gets his stats since all his doubters think thats all that matters. It’s kinda a funny read.
Follow me on twitter: @Super_Stud2100
Yeah.
Despite my better judgment, a manager at Battle Red Blog.
Supreme Galactic Editor of Battle Red Onion.
I am a visionary, I am a genius, and now I am angry! Now where are those pants at?!
Football is war by other means. - Carl von Clausewitz...sorta.
by UprootedTexan on Aug 29, 2011 4:32 PM CDT up reply actions
Must be a Sportsradio 610 caller posting on their blog.
Mario Williams will have 2 sacks and 6 tackles against the 49ers
Nevermind found out.
http://www.dawgsbynature.com/2011/8/29/2391410/the-browns-should-trade-for-mario-williams
Prediction: 11-5 AFC South champions.
Pretty elabroate plan to be honest.
Although I saw a Browns fan make a post claiming people here (on BRB) want to trade Mario. I haven’t seen that but the claim about Reed is somewhat accurate. He’s definitely made the adjustment much quicker than Mario but that’s not enough for me to say in limited time it won’t pan out.
Besides we can always move him back to DE and as we all know he will be at DE when we go nickel anyways.
Prediction: 11-5 AFC South champions.
Yeah, I thought the Browns fans post about BRB fans wanting to trade Mario was weird.......
I think we’ve defended him more than anything…. LOL
Mario Williams will have 2 sacks and 6 tackles against the 49ers
Well... not frequently, anyway...
"Suck it, Jim Tressel, you filthy, cheating, unfashionable piece of monkey scrotum."
- MDC
"Let’s leave all the football talk to knowledgeable experts who have played the game, like Matt Millen and Emmitt Smith."
-tehGrindCrusher
Out of all that, this little nugget of pure wisdom stood out to me:
Sure we would have a gaping hole at CB, but that is something we could fix later.
by WhiskeyR on Aug 29, 2011 4:29 PM CDT up reply actions 3 recs
the article does make a lot of sense.
While I’d hate to see Mario leave, that contract of his really is going to be a major headache at the end of the season. Only the coaches really know how his transition is going. As much as they say Reed outplayed him, I don’t think Reed did so against starters.
Also, I think the success others are having imo is b/c of Mario’s presence on the field. He had to be accounted for wherever he lines up. He was being disruptive simply by being in the play.
Yeah the points made about his contract were spot on. But we could franchise him.
And I don’t think the coaches have ever said Reed has outplayed Mario (that article assumes Mario is the 4th best LB on the team though) Kubiak just said he’s made the best progress out of any of the other players in camp. Which is true. He’s obviously gotten better each preseason game I’ve seen him.
But as you said he’s playing against 2nd and sometimes 3rd string O-lineman. He’s going to be huge in the rotation this year but I don’t see him dominating (yet) from the edge.
And that article doesn’t account for the fact that we will use Mario as a 4-man DE in our nickel,quarter, etc formations. And we may see that a lot considering some of the passing teams we’ll be playing (like the Colts) or if we’re up late and the opposing team is throwing to win.
Prediction: 11-5 AFC South champions.
Whoever wrote this and whoever supports it has no patience.
He’s changing positions. The transition might take some time.
He took a big step in the SanFran game by getting 5 hurries on the QB.
Trading him in his last year of his contract might seem like a good idea, but who replaces him? Brooks Reed? Sure, Reed has kicked ass this preseason, but Mario has a huge impact on the game. If he doesn’t get to the QB when he’s 1on1, he’s being doubled, freeing up Watt, Barwin, and Smith, who are all good pass rushers.
Trading Mario would be downright stupid, especially since the main reasoning for doing so is because he’s not getting 10 sacks per game while transitioning to a new position.
"Hakeem couldn't kick your ass cuz you were too
close kissin his!"- Sir Charles to Kenny Smith.
by bone31crusher on Aug 29, 2011 5:00 PM CDT up reply actions
i tend to beleive that it would be easier for brooks to learn a new position because he hasnt been playing 1 certain position so long. not set in his ways as much. mario has been training his body and muscles to dominate from the defensive end position
year in an year out. now he has to retrain his brain AND his body to do things, not totally, but pretty dam different. reed is younger therefore more moldable right now. i think its the old dog new tricks thing. mario IS gonna get it. one only need to apply common sense to kno its gonna take more than 5 or 6 quarters of preseason football….
Im looking for divine and a lttle intervention
And birds dont fly without my permission
Im prolly in the sky, flyin with the fishes
Or maybe in the ocean, swimmin with the pigeons
See my world is different, like Dwayne Wayne
And if you want problem Bit#h, i want the same thang
by F-BombTheJets on Aug 29, 2011 8:05 PM CDT up reply actions
I posted a comment to the article providing some points I think a lot of us would agree with
Should be at or towards the bottom of the comments section.
if Trindon can play in Week 4
I think he’d make tomorrow’s cuts. He did return one (not sure if kick or punt) for TD in camp, but we’ve yet to see him against other teams in front of 60k+ fans.
Yep looks like he's going to survive the first round of cuts.
NickScurfield Nick Scurfield
WR Trindon Holliday (hamstring) returned to practice today. Kubiak expects him to play this week. He’s missed the whole preseason
Prediction: 11-5 AFC South champions.
This game may be it though.
Based on what they have him do and how well he does it.
Prediction: 11-5 AFC South champions.
True.
I just liked him in college, mainly. Though that could also be because LSU is my favorite SEC team.
The Two-Day Hangover @ SBN Houston | Twitter
Texans are gonna have to be EXTREMELY pass happy to get all these recievers looks. Also, I really wanna see what Slaton looks like.
by Its Gonna Happen on Aug 29, 2011 4:29 PM CDT via mobile reply actions
yeah me too
especially with several camp reports saying he showed the explosiveness he had in his rookie year. Still fumbled a couple of times though.
Thing is, do we want to see him b/c we want him to be traded? Or do we want him to climb over Ward for the 3rd RB spot?
I don't trust him
Give him some film as a “thanks for 2008” then let him go to another team.
Keep Ward cuz 5 YPC is nothing to be ashamed of.
2011 Crystal Ball
Dorin Dickerson coming out party
Damn you, Peyton Manning. You fucked me more times than I can remember, but now you've crossed the line when you fucked me in fantasy. REDRUM, Peyton Manning... REDRUM.
by BRBUSAFTexan on Aug 29, 2011 4:43 PM CDT up reply actions
Yes they are.
Which is unfortunate because the second team o-line is now full of 3rd team o-lineman with all the injuries.
Not sure how many times Leinart will throw but I think Yates will get to sling it around.
Prediction: 11-5 AFC South champions.
I really like Yates
I think he’ll do better than Lienart if the protection holds up
by Its Gonna Happen on Aug 29, 2011 4:47 PM CDT via mobile up reply actions
I'd love to see the last preseason game...
Involve TJ Yates airing it out fifty times. It’d certainly be a whole hell of a lot more interesting than watching our banged-up back-up offensive line flail opening up running lanes all game.
might as well
Tate and Ward prob share snaps in the first series or two if first series was a 3 and out. Slaton and Og can take the RB snaps for rest of the game. Prob more Slaton than Og and hopefully increase his trade value.
S James Sanders was cut today by the Patriots
Among Sanders’ claims to fame:
- game-winning interceptions against Ben Rothilisberger and P8on Manning
- beat out Eugene Wilson for his first starting assignment
- has been called a leader by Bill Belechick
I didn't do anything wrong!.... and, I won't do it again.
See... it was going so well until #3...
Just kidding… Belicheat gets a pass from me just for his abuse of the media… MOAR media abuse!!!
"Suck it, Jim Tressel, you filthy, cheating, unfashionable piece of monkey scrotum."
- MDC
"Let’s leave all the football talk to knowledgeable experts who have played the game, like Matt Millen and Emmitt Smith."
-tehGrindCrusher
Um until #2
Mario Williams will have 4 sacks and 1 int by Game 4 of the regular season.
by Barryfromtexas on Aug 29, 2011 5:17 PM CDT up reply actions
I have a pet rock
he also beat out Eugene Wilson.
2011 Crystal Ball
Dorin Dickerson coming out party
Damn you, Peyton Manning. You fucked me more times than I can remember, but now you've crossed the line when you fucked me in fantasy. REDRUM, Peyton Manning... REDRUM.
by BRBUSAFTexan on Aug 29, 2011 5:18 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
I think we are set at safety.
Manning, Quin, and Nolan is a pretty decent group. Maybe a 4th one or a CB like McManis also in the mix.
If anything we should be looking at o-lineman that are cut considering the injuries we’ve taken to the 2nd team line.
Prediction: 11-5 AFC South champions.
Sure
some get cut cuz they don’t fit a certain scheme. Gimme more ZONE BLOCK!
2011 Crystal Ball
Dorin Dickerson coming out party
Damn you, Peyton Manning. You fucked me more times than I can remember, but now you've crossed the line when you fucked me in fantasy. REDRUM, Peyton Manning... REDRUM.
by BRBUSAFTexan on Aug 29, 2011 5:50 PM CDT up reply actions
you mean MOOOOOOOOOOOOAR zone block!
and cowbells.
"It's very SIMPLE angela!!!!! LOOK AT WHAT I'M DOING... AND GO TELL SOMEBODY IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!" - Andy
@doobieman21
youtube/chrisdogan
Case in point
Texans placed OG Shelley Smith on injured reserve with an ankle injury, ending his season.
The Texans had high hopes for Smith as a developmental prospect, but couldn’t afford to save his roster spot with Kasey Studdard and Antoine Caldwell on the shelf as well. The team signed ex-Bengals G/T Andrew Gardner to replace Smith on the roster. Gardner is transitioning from a power- to zone-blocking scheme.
2011 Crystal Ball
Dorin Dickerson coming out party
Damn you, Peyton Manning. You fucked me more times than I can remember, but now you've crossed the line when you fucked me in fantasy. REDRUM, Peyton Manning... REDRUM.
by BRBUSAFTexan on Aug 29, 2011 9:20 PM CDT up reply actions
^^^ quote noob
2011 Crystal Ball
Dorin Dickerson coming out party
Damn you, Peyton Manning. You fucked me more times than I can remember, but now you've crossed the line when you fucked me in fantasy. REDRUM, Peyton Manning... REDRUM.
by BRBUSAFTexan on Aug 29, 2011 9:20 PM CDT up reply actions
I don't think I want another safety that the Patriots dropped.
Especially if they dropped him just to get down to 80. The last zombie didn’t work out too well for us.
Wonder who went to IR. I know one of them was probably Studdard.
NickScurfield Nick Scurfield
Kubiak didn’t announce any cuts after practice today but said that the Texans had to put a few players on I.R.
Prediction: 11-5 AFC South champions.
im gonna bet that Slaton makes the team...
but goes to I.R. i just don’t see them cutting him this year.
"It's very SIMPLE angela!!!!! LOOK AT WHAT I'M DOING... AND GO TELL SOMEBODY IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!" - Andy
@doobieman21
youtube/chrisdogan
i don't think they can do that
Also don’t think Slaton’s agent will want him on IR if he’s capable of playing.
And this is why Foster is my favorite player...
When I[Peter King] was in Houston the other day, I asked Foster his feelings about this national obsession. "It’s good for getting the people who aren’t normally into football — they watch the games,‘’ he said. "But I think it’s changing the way people watch the games. They’re more interested in stats … That kind of takes away from the reason we play this game, and that’s to get a ring. Don’t get me wrong — I love my fans. I love our fans of the game… But don’t get mad at a player because he doesn’t perform for your [fantasy] team.’’
Read more: http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2011/writers/peter_king/08/28/preseason.week.3/index.html#ixzz1WSY4veyx
REDRUM
Peyton Manning…. REDRUM
2011 Crystal Ball
Dorin Dickerson coming out party
Damn you, Peyton Manning. You fucked me more times than I can remember, but now you've crossed the line when you fucked me in fantasy. REDRUM, Peyton Manning... REDRUM.
by BRBUSAFTexan on Aug 29, 2011 5:31 PM CDT up reply actions
And here I thought with the title - it was going to be about 2 of my favorite players
90 and 80 :)
Mario Williams will have 4 sacks and 1 int by Game 4 of the regular season.
both of whom should be cut
80 for dropping a 30yd pass in game 2 and 90 for posting no stats in game 3.
Yes, I’m joking.
nature of the beast.
and a byproduct of having so many “good guys” on the team.
the DUMBEST SHIT GETS BLOWN OUT OF PROPORTION.
remember a few weeks back the AJ “controversy” of saying that Mario Williams could “take over the league if he wanted to?” according to J & R that meant that AJ was CHALLENGING mario. this fantasy football nonsense is stupid. people who do care more about fantasy football than the actual athlete ARE sick. those dweeby “push my glasses up because i have a beak for a nose” types who sit silently in the basement and blog bullshit, and in true comic book guy fashion, give a good loud “hmph” after they click send.
the bastards.
"It's very SIMPLE angela!!!!! LOOK AT WHAT I'M DOING... AND GO TELL SOMEBODY IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!" - Andy
@doobieman21
youtube/chrisdogan
I assume you don't have a quality league
2011 Crystal Ball
Dorin Dickerson coming out party
Damn you, Peyton Manning. You fucked me more times than I can remember, but now you've crossed the line when you fucked me in fantasy. REDRUM, Peyton Manning... REDRUM.
by BRBUSAFTexan on Aug 29, 2011 5:53 PM CDT up reply actions
honestly?
i hardly play. past 4 years i stopped caring after like 3 weeks..
i prefer real football.
"It's very SIMPLE angela!!!!! LOOK AT WHAT I'M DOING... AND GO TELL SOMEBODY IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!" - Andy
@doobieman21
youtube/chrisdogan
19 of my best friends have a league
20 team IDP with 33 roster-able players, all strictly for bragging rights. I tried to play one year with my family and found it really boring then my friend started my current league up. It’s crazy fun.
If you care, follow the link to the most robust league I have EVER seen.
http://www26.myfantasyleague.com/2011/home/25733
My team is LOS DIABLOS or ‘fighting chickens’
2011 Crystal Ball
Dorin Dickerson coming out party
Damn you, Peyton Manning. You fucked me more times than I can remember, but now you've crossed the line when you fucked me in fantasy. REDRUM, Peyton Manning... REDRUM.
by BRBUSAFTexan on Aug 29, 2011 6:01 PM CDT up reply actions
Precisely why
I will not draft anyone from our division rivals for my FF team. As for other opponents. I will not root for them when they play against the Texans, reality > fantasy. There will be some “well at least the guy who scored on us is on my FF team”, but I won’t be happy if my FF team won but Texans lost.
Sorry but I think Arian's
comments were way over the top. I mean its not like the guy had a life-threatening injury; it’s a pulled hamstring! Of course, most people care for Arian as a person, just like most people care for most other people as people and don’t wish anyone any harm. But, he is a football player and fantasy football is a VERY BIG business in this country and is very popular so, sure, most people were wanting to know how he was doing as it related to the Texans season 1st (to Texans fans anyway), and as it related to their fantasy football league 2nd. I mean, come on people, we all know he is okay as a person and will be okay as a professional football player, as it stands right now so the caring for Arian as a person is understood.
Are you serious?
Have you never heard people say “Man, I hope [X player] gets injured so I can beat [Y Fantasy Team]”? I hear that shit all the time and I don’t even play fantasy. It doesn’t matter how big of a business anything is. A person’s life and/or health should never be questioned just because you want some fucking points for your pathetic, meaningless little team. It’s not Arian’s fault that you paid 5,000$ to draft him on something that’s so trivial.
The man is above all that bullshit because he has a higher intellect. He understands the meaning of caring about his team and his teammates. His goal is to win a super bowl ring, not win your Fantasy Bowl. This shit is just ridiculous that he’s getting blown up on the media because he doesn’t like that people hope he stays hurt or gets better because you want points on your board… not because we[Texans] want points on our board.
RRRrraaaaaaaaggggeeeee...
/steroids usage
Sorry...
Didn’t mean to get so passionate. I just think this whole argument over his statements are way overblown. It’s the man’s opinion and he’s entitlted to it. That’s all I mean to say.
by Bennyscrap on Aug 30, 2011 8:37 AM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
I certainly understand...
and I think I may not have expressed my opinion well enough. Anyone who actually wants any player to be injured so it would help their fantasy team is sick and I would say that person needs to have their tongue pulled out through their ass! The point I not so successfully was trying to make is that I don’t fault anyone for asking how he is doing with their fantasy team foremost in their thoughts. That doesn’t mean they want him to be hurt or even that they don’t care about how he is doing, just that they want to know if they should trade him, bench him, etc. I mean most people will never even meet Arian so to care about how is doing as a person is no different than caring about any stranger is doing as a person. I believe most people are good in general and that’s why that is understood.
So I want to say – again. If you actually WANTED Arian to be hurt so it would help your fantasy team then you are and, most likely, will always be a piece of shit and I’ll be right there next to Arian telling you to your face. But on the other hand, assuming that someone doesn’t care about you as a person just because they ask how you are doing, even if they are primarily thinking about their fantasy team, is way over the top.
"...that person needs to have their tongue pulled out through their ass! ..."
But what about the situation where its someone like Pancakes, where the tongue is firmly ensconced there already?
"Suck it, Jim Tressel, you filthy, cheating, unfashionable piece of monkey scrotum."
- MDC
"Let’s leave all the football talk to knowledgeable experts who have played the game, like Matt Millen and Emmitt Smith."
-tehGrindCrusher
Good point.
In that case it should probably be reversed. Pull out their tongue through their mouth via their ass! :-)
Mmmmm... thanks for the vigorous defense... but I think I know what he's getting at...
/blushes
/gargles
/wags
"Suck it, Jim Tressel, you filthy, cheating, unfashionable piece of monkey scrotum."
- MDC
"Let’s leave all the football talk to knowledgeable experts who have played the game, like Matt Millen and Emmitt Smith."
-tehGrindCrusher
But Rip... never forget... I can also reach the playground too...
… eat your heart out.
"Suck it, Jim Tressel, you filthy, cheating, unfashionable piece of monkey scrotum."
- MDC
"Let’s leave all the football talk to knowledgeable experts who have played the game, like Matt Millen and Emmitt Smith."
-tehGrindCrusher
Yo Rip
Is that a Jack Russell? Kind of hard to tell on this computer but it seems to look a lot like mine except more brown on the face.
Another question – where is the link to the glossary on here? I’ve still never been able to find it and there are a couple of abbreviations I’m still unsure about.
So Im thinking
The Colts are watching the Texans preseason and know that they’re going to lose the opener. So they have decided not to play Paintin so they can: A) blame the loss on not having their key player on the field. B) don’t wanna see the Monstar that has become the Texans D rape their rookie O-Line and destroy their beloved QB’s career (life).
by Its Gonna Happen on Aug 29, 2011 6:02 PM CDT via mobile reply actions
Well lets hold off on the Texans defense instilling fear in opponents QB's at this point.
Lets not forget our week 3 performance in the preseason last year. Even in loses Manning has had his way with the Texans so if he can go you know the Colts want him on the field.
I personally WANT him under center week 1. No better test than Peyton. Like last season when he shredded our defense and gave us a preview of the upcoming year.
Prediction: 11-5 AFC South champions.
I dont know
I think the Jets and Saints were pretty good tests, granted it is only preseason, but The Texans looked like the better team in both games.
by Its Gonna Happen on Aug 29, 2011 6:12 PM CDT via mobile up reply actions
Jets
were missing two starters. Saints, I think, had one missing.
2011 Crystal Ball
Dorin Dickerson coming out party
Damn you, Peyton Manning. You fucked me more times than I can remember, but now you've crossed the line when you fucked me in fantasy. REDRUM, Peyton Manning... REDRUM.
by BRBUSAFTexan on Aug 29, 2011 6:13 PM CDT up reply actions
As opposed to how many for the Texans?
by Its Gonna Happen on Aug 29, 2011 6:14 PM CDT via mobile up reply actions
My bad, talking purely O-line
2011 Crystal Ball
Dorin Dickerson coming out party
Damn you, Peyton Manning. You fucked me more times than I can remember, but now you've crossed the line when you fucked me in fantasy. REDRUM, Peyton Manning... REDRUM.
by BRBUSAFTexan on Aug 29, 2011 6:16 PM CDT up reply actions
Ah, gotcha
I’m not saying this is going to be the best D we’ve ever seen, but I’m not gonna say its not either…
I’m excited!
by Its Gonna Happen on Aug 29, 2011 6:19 PM CDT via mobile up reply actions
I'll say it.
This is going to be the best defense we have ever had! Obviously not run defense but pass defense – yes – and overall defense – yes. Prediction – Texans finish season with #7 defense in the league.
that would be nice
but I’d hope it translates to winning the division.
We finished 15th in defense a couple years ago. I want the AFC South.
This is our year. (This part is automatically generated every year in August)
my Z key can't take another free agent flurry
Starters only played one quarter in the Jets game
So those guys (Mangold and whoever the other is) would have been out after that. Most of the damage we did was done by our backups vs. their backups.
Michael Lombardi tosses Brian Baldinger's salad.
With syrup.
Well the Jets passing offense isn't strong and their starters only went like 1 or 2 drives.
I agree the Saints game we looked strong but again, in preseason teams aren’t using much beyond vanilla and only a single half of football against them isn’t enough to convince me yet. We did give up two 40+ yard passes that game.
Prediction: 11-5 AFC South champions.
Playing devil's advocate ..
I think the Colts/P8un would be idiotic imbecilic moronic dumbasses if he did play in week 1. With the way our defense has been getting to quarterbacks (and not just the backups) why would they put their entire franchise’s hope at risk with no practice time and probably not 100%. Everyone knows without the 4head, the Dolts have no chance of going anywhere this season. Because of this I don’t see any way he plays week 1. I don’t think he plays until week 3 at the earliest. If he does play I see a very good chance he could be lost for the season. If that happens Texans get first win ever in Indy – bank on it.
Going to tune in to the Giants/Jets game.
Plaxico had quite a game in his debut and I want to see his follow up performance.
Prediction: 11-5 AFC South champions.
I hate the jets but I wish plaxico well
I have always been a big fan of his and I wish we would have signed him
by TheDream34 on Aug 29, 2011 6:22 PM CDT via mobile up reply actions
LOL!
He shot himself in the leg. What a dummy….
I still giggle about that from time to time. It sucks he got jail time at all. 2 years was extremely overboard. Whatever happened to community service?
2011 Crystal Ball
Dorin Dickerson coming out party
Damn you, Peyton Manning. You fucked me more times than I can remember, but now you've crossed the line when you fucked me in fantasy. REDRUM, Peyton Manning... REDRUM.
by BRBUSAFTexan on Aug 29, 2011 6:31 PM CDT up reply actions
Ya
I think getting shot in the leg is punishment enough for getting shot in the leg. Getting 2 years jail time and being shot in the leg is pretty over the top
by Its Gonna Happen on Aug 29, 2011 6:39 PM CDT via mobile up reply actions
In the "For What It's Worth" department:
Texans just signed Bryant Johnson.
Despite my better judgment, a manager at Battle Red Blog.
Supreme Galactic Editor of Battle Red Onion.
I am a visionary, I am a genius, and now I am angry! Now where are those pants at?!
Football is war by other means. - Carl von Clausewitz...sorta.
Guess we are desperate for a #4 and #5 WR.
Makes sense since only Lestar has really shown any potential so far and he’s hurt.
Prediction: 11-5 AFC South champions.
Dorin Dickerson says:
YOU DON’T NEED A 5TH RECEIVER…I GOT THIS!
by Its Gonna Happen on Aug 29, 2011 7:00 PM CDT via mobile up reply actions
You mean the guy the Lions let go?
It’s fodder time…
2011 Crystal Ball
Dorin Dickerson coming out party
Damn you, Peyton Manning. You fucked me more times than I can remember, but now you've crossed the line when you fucked me in fantasy. REDRUM, Peyton Manning... REDRUM.
by BRBUSAFTexan on Aug 29, 2011 7:05 PM CDT up reply actions
Yeah.
He’s been solid his entire career except for last season. I’d take him right now over the other guys fighting for those last two spots.
Prediction: 11-5 AFC South champions.
First round draft pick in 03...hasn't shown much though
by Its Gonna Happen on Aug 29, 2011 7:12 PM CDT via mobile up reply actions
Yeah he didn't live up to where he was drafted.
But he can still makes plays.
He’s at least good enough to sub in for Jacoby and Walters and I think it was a good depth move for us at WR. Andre plus 3 decent WR’s works for me.
Prediction: 11-5 AFC South champions.

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