Prognostibatin': Looking At The Texans' 2011 Schedule
by MDC on Aug 3, 2011 12:34 PM CDT
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Every year when the NFL schedules are released, three things inevitably happen. First, people celebrate/bemoan their favorite team's schedule. Second, someone (or multiple someones) points out that most opinions on the schedules are based on how teams fared in the just-finished season, which is silly because of the amount of turnover and the (illusion of) parity in the NFL. Third, I poop.1
The part about waiting before you bust out your Jump To Conclusions Mat is well-taken. Mid-April, before the draft and (this year, at least) before free agency, is way too early to get a feel for how the Texans (or any team, save the Bengals) stack up against their upcoming opponents.
Early August, however, is a whole different matter. 'Round about this time of year, one might feel safe in making some predictions. One might even turn those predictions into a blog post on an otherwise slow Wednesday. Now, as was once commanded by Sir Mix-A-Lot2: "Houston jump on it, jump on it, jump on it (Ooh, lord!)"
Week 1: v. Indianapolis. I'm still not 100% convinced that Sinciput Cinco starts at QB for the Colts in week 1. Even if he does, the fact that the Colts have rookies at LT and LG (i.e., that area where Mario Williams and J.J. Watt will be rocking people's faces) makes me feel good about this game. Prediction: Win (1-0).
Week 2: @ Miami. Chad Henne! (Or will it be Pat Devlin? Or Matt Moore? Or Tom Brandstate?) Reggie Bush! Brandon Marshall (now with additional baggage)! This team has "atrocious offense" written all over it. Throw in that the Texans have never lost to the Dolphins and that the Texans have won those games on the strength of their kicker, Matt Schaub's ability to lead a comeback, and despite playing a schizophrenic game, and you have to like Houston's odds here. Prediction: Win (2-0).
Week 3: @ New Orleans. I feel like this is the biggest test of the new defense in the first half of the season, even more than the Colts game. They have more legitimate WRs than the Texans have CBs who don't give me panic attacks, and the common thread in the Saints' losses last year was forcing the Saints to turn the ball over more times than you did. They also struggled against a 3-4 front (losses to Cleveland, Baltimore, Arizona). Still, I won't feel good about this game until I see that the Texans can actually force turnovers. Prediction: Loss (2-1).
Week 4: v. Pittsburgh. I still have nightmares about the last time the Texans played the Steelers. That said, I see an offense that declined from 2009 to 2010 and a defense with all its major components on the wrong side of 30. Throw in that this is a home game, and I actually feel pretty good about it. Prediction: Win (3-1).
Week 5: v. Oakland. Last year's game was much closer than it should have been, mainly because the Texans were in the process of trying out their "let's just not worry about covering TEs" approach and Andre Johnson did not play (meaning Nnamdi Asomugha was free to shut down Kevin Walter or Jacoby Jones). Neither of those factors should be in play this year, and Scrabble has left the building. Fun fact: The Texans have never lost to the Raiders in games in which Jesse Nading did not have to cover Darren McFadden on a passing route. Prediction: Win (4-1).
Week 6: @ Baltimore. Last season's overtime debacle against the Ravens still bugs the crap out of me, if only because it was Coach Gary in microcosm. At this point, can anyone doubt that a poor coaching decision will cost the Texans at least one game this season? This game, where Haloti Ngata is likely to go back-of-a-Volkswagon on some of the O-line, seems like the type of matchup that Gary could lose, so I'll stick with that. Prediction: Loss (4-2).
Week 7: @ Methopotamia. Going from Kerry Collins to Matt Hasselbeck (who hasn't thrown for more TDs than INTs since 2007, just fyi) is like going from a 1986 Chevy Monte Carlo to a 1990 Buick Century. (Jake Locker is a 2005 Subaru Legacy GT in this analogy.) If Chris Johnson continues his holdout --- and he should, what with the MAN trying to hold him down and not giving him his due respect --- the Titans will not score in this game. If Johnson does play, they won't score enough to win. Prediction: Win (5-2).
Week 8: v. Jacksonville. Ask the next person you see to name two Jacksonville WRs. $5 says they can't do it. Oh, sure, they brought in Paul Posluszny, but if they get a full season out of him, it will only be the second time in his entire career (games played, by season: 3, 16, 12, 14). Oh, and they guaranteed themselves a QB controversy should the team stumble out of the gate. Prediction: Win (6-2).
Week 9: v. Cleveland. It's probably not a great sign when you trade for a player and, rather than come to camp, he says "Cleveland?! Aww, HELL NO." Also, when Peyton Hillis falls victim to the cover jinx, there will be many, many sad Arkansans. Looking forward to that. Prediction: Win (7-2).
Week 10: @ Tampa Bay. You know in Caddyshack when Rodney Dangerfield comes into the pro shop and says, "Hey, orange balls! I'll have a box of those and give me a box of those naked-lady tees, gimme two of those, gimme six of those..."? That's how Mark Domanik approached free agency. All the same, this is a solid team with legitimate offensive weapons and a solid D that has been improved to some degree via the draft. I do think the Texans are the better team in this matchup, but I also think that coming into a game like this at 7-2 might make the team take this Bucs team for granted. Prediction: Loss (7-3).
Week 11: Bye.
Week 12: v. @ Jacksonville. See above re: Jacksonville's problems. The good news, of course, is that very few people will be on hand to see any of this. Prediction: Win (8-3).
Week 13: v. Atlanta. Ok, yes, I think that trading as much as they did to draft Julio Jones was stupid in a big-picture sense. Scoring points was not their problem last year. Versus the Texans, though, that draft pick will look genius, as Jones is likely to be covered by Kareem Jackson or Jason Allen, either of which is only slightly better in this scenario than leaving him uncovered entirely would be. Prediction: Loss (8-4).
Week 14: @ Cincinnati. Just when I was worried that we wouldn't get to see Bruce Gradkowski in 2011, Carson Palmer decides that not playing football is better than playing football for the Bengals. (In fairness, he's probably right.) Oh, you'll also probably get to see Fred Bennett in this game, so it'll be like that awkward family reunion where you saw the third-cousin that you kissed when you were both 14. I honestly think this will be the Texans' defense's best game of the season, both in terms of forcing turnovers and points allowed. Prediction: Win (9-4).
Week 15: v. Carolina. I assume, based on their bringing in Derek Anderson, that the Panthers are planning on starting Cam Newton from Day 1. Meaning that there will be 13 weeks of tape on him by the time the Texans face Newton. He has no real targets at WR and only Greg Olsen at TE. No, I don't count Jeremy Shockey as a real target. Assuming the Texans staff closely watches all laptop computers in the facility, I don't see any way that the Panthers leave here with anything but a loss. Prediction: Win (10-4).
Week 16: @ Indianapolis. Assuming Peyton Manning has not retired or had his neck broken by this point in the season, I think it's also safe to assume that he's going to beat the Texans in Indy. This screams letdown game as well, coming off an easy victory that gives the team 10 wins for the first time. Finally, throw in my belief that Indy will be trailing Houston in the standings at this point, so the game will mean more to them, and I think a loss is likely. Prediction: Loss (10-5).
Week 17: v. BESFs. Jake Locker has a good chance to be starting at this point, as Hasselbeck is highly likely to suffer a season-ending injury and/or to suck to the point that people want to see the rookie playing QB. (It'll be like when Vince took over as a rookie! Only like someone reversed the negative! And reversed the results!) Prediction: Win (11-5).
So, there you have it, BRBers. One guy's admittedly optimistic take on how the season will unfold. What say you?
***
1 Note: The third is not related to the first two, but it most certainly happens on the day the schedule comes out, just as it happens every other day of the year. I poop on a schedule that would rival Swiss trains.
2 Just who was Mix-A-Lot knighted by, anyway?
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Comments
We won't beat pitt I dont think.
But I think you probally got 14 out of 16 right. (I’m hoping your wrong on one of the losses
by Carter Liles on Aug 3, 2011 12:44 PM CDT via mobile reply actions
Yeah.
Pitt could be the Gary-boner game instead of Baltimore. I was torn between which one of those to call a loss.
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"Not to completely equate marriage to fandom, but both rely on suspended insanity a bit." --beefy
I think we beat Pitt
They do not match up to us well at all
I can’t say how well our D matches up yet – no one can, but there offense isn’t that great.
"All our lives, we’re taught to get in line. The ones who conform never discover."-Arian Foster
sǝɹnʇɐuƃıs uʍop ǝpısdn ʇnoqɐ sʇuǝɯɯoɔ ǝuo ou
by Barryfromtexas on Aug 3, 2011 5:56 PM CDT up reply actions
ar-CAN-zuhns
PUT TYLER ON THE GREENE!!
Public Relations Officer of the Tyler Greene Fan Club.
by Stash Musial on Aug 3, 2011 12:55 PM CDT up reply actions
Correct.
Conversely, people in Kansas pronounce the Arkansas River as the ar-CAN-zuhs river.
I like to annoy Arkies by calling them Arkansawyers.
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"MDC: Droppin' knowledge like a librarian with Parkinson's." --Jonathan Loesche
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"Not to completely equate marriage to fandom, but both rely on suspended insanity a bit." --beefy
by MDC on Aug 3, 2011 1:02 PM CDT up reply actions
And why wouldn't it be
Arkansanians?
Or Arkansanites?
Or East Tennesseans (cause I assume they can’t read a compass)?
for the same reason they sign with an "X"
fewer letters
by WakePhil on Aug 3, 2011 12:57 PM CDT up reply actions 4 recs
or a map?
"My idea of an agreeable person is a person who agrees with me." -- Benjamin Disraeli
"If you really want something in life you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers." -- Homer Simpson
"There is no rehab for stupid." -- Chris Rock
Never try to baptize a cat.
I just CANT
see my beloved Houston Texans goin 11-5. No way right? Maybe it is just this new idea of our team actually being a good solid football team. BUT, until I see something different out of them in the first couple weeks, I have to think more realistically, like a 9-7 MAYBE 10-6….
by Da babyfacedassassin Meco on Aug 3, 2011 12:48 PM CDT reply actions
Bastard
I’m trying to stay grounded here. To make a Breaking Bad analogy: I’m trying to stay off the junk (Texans optimism) and you are Jesse supplying the drugs, food and women (11-5 prediction) to fuel the never ending party. Did you watch last week? Did you see where that ended up? Some lower ring of hell.
It didn’t work for Jesse and it won’t work for you. This prognostibatin’ can’t distract you from the reality of your life as a Texans fan and the dark things it has done to your soul.
I chose 10-6 just cause that's what my intuition tells me...
I could be wrong and they might do better than expected but I’m not going to hold my breath.
/sorry I don’t feel like turning steel blue in the face
"My idea of an agreeable person is a person who agrees with me." -- Benjamin Disraeli
"If you really want something in life you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers." -- Homer Simpson
"There is no rehab for stupid." -- Chris Rock
Never try to baptize a cat.
Not buying 5-1 in the division.
Jacksonville is going to get us once. But I’m also not buying Tampa as a legitimate team (when nine of your wins come against Cleveland, Carolina twice, Cinci, St. Louis, Arizona, San Francisco, Washington, and Seattle, you’re still a 4-12 team to me).
11-5 sounds nice, though.
We should beat Tampa
I’m going to that game, in Tampa. I follow them fairly closely (they’re my Dad’s team). They don’t have the talent we do and every year when I’m at one of their games the fans seem to have about as much confidence in their team as we do. Josh Freeman is one of the most underrated QBs in the league right now, but I don’t see their defense being able to contain our offense.
13-3 or better
3 votes
Can I have some of what you’re smoking/snorting/drinking?
Canal Street Chronicles-A place of great Saints news and information. Oh and the stuff I write!
"I rejected those answers. Instead, I chose something different. I chose the impossible. I chose...Rapture!"
I think I'll just take it game by game this year
to avoid a complete mental breakdown
I went with 10-6 last year
I’ll go 10-6 this year. If they start hot and look good, maybe I’ll re-evaluate
Follow me on twitter: @Super_Stud2100
You didn't hear?
Rivers got a tattoo of Bill Kollar on his bicep he’s so excited.
A Texans fan. Really. No, I'm not kidding.
http://www.battleredblog.com
"Blind fandom is all I got left." - LoneSpot
*Kareem Jackson
Canal Street Chronicles-A place of great Saints news and information. Oh and the stuff I write!
"I rejected those answers. Instead, I chose something different. I chose the impossible. I chose...Rapture!"
Not true, I got it wrapped around my pinky finger.
Didn’t want Bill to get offended by all the girth.
- Rivers McCown, From Mom's Basement | Twitter | Football Outsiders | Battle Red Blog
by riversmccown on Aug 3, 2011 2:13 PM CDT up reply actions 6 recs
ditto
"All our lives, we’re taught to get in line. The ones who conform never discover."-Arian Foster
sǝɹnʇɐuƃıs uʍop ǝpısdn ʇnoqɐ sʇuǝɯɯoɔ ǝuo ou
by Barryfromtexas on Aug 3, 2011 6:00 PM CDT up reply actions
I have us at 11-5 but different wins.
Although I think we beat the Falcons at home, lose to the Jags on the road, beat the Colts in Indy for the first time and beat the Bucs at their place.
Need to look my prediction back up.
No matter how bad it gets,I will believe.It's the only thing I have left for the Texans.
Also cool.
BRB is the #1 site when you google “prognostibating.”
A Texans fan. Really. No, I'm not kidding.
http://www.battleredblog.com
"Blind fandom is all I got left." - LoneSpot
I don't know if BRB does...
…but I do!
ZING!
A Texans fan. Really. No, I'm not kidding.
http://www.battleredblog.com
"Blind fandom is all I got left." - LoneSpot
by bigfatdrunk on Aug 3, 2011 1:30 PM CDT up reply actions 6 recs
yeh, in the seclusion of your private place.....
I didn't do anything wrong!.... and, I won't do it again.
where do you think the term "prognostibatin'" comes from....
I didn't do anything wrong!.... and, I won't do it again.
not nearly as cool being #1for PTP
"If my hips had pockets, I wouldn't wear pants at all." @NotBurtReynolds
Yeah, that... right Jordann?
"Thank you for setting us straight on that Mr. Lombardi...Your cogent use of logical argument backed by your impressive knowledge of the smallest details of the modern professional game has made believers of us all."
- tehGrindCrusher
The first Indy game will be interesting
Last year, a certain New York team took us out behind the woodshed and did all sorts of nasty things to us. How much was Rosencopter a factor? Or was our offensive gameplan just totally wrong about them? Say what you want about Orlovsky as a quarterback, but he’s not an idiot. He knows our system. How much of a factor will that be in game one? I’m not too sure about saying Indy with no Manning is a sure win.
Surely the Colts know our system at least as well as Orlovsky does.
And they can find their helmets, so they have a leg up on him there too.
"A threat is about a verb short of a win..." - TEXSON
Hell, the system has decades of film archive.
Knowing what we like is one thing. Knowing what we’ll do (and how we’ll do it) tomorrow, is something else.
Well giving up 21 points in the first quarter isn't a good way of going about winning games.
We had to play catch up the rest of the game which played right into the Giants hands. Our offense isn’t really about hitting big plays like the Eagles or Chargers.
It’s sustained drives with balance between running and passing.
Besides all that the Colts have seen what we can do on offense and know what we’ll do. It’s all about executing the plays.
No matter how bad it gets,I will believe.It's the only thing I have left for the Texans.
Great stuff, Matt
I went with 10-6. I originally had 11-5, but I figure Kubiak will cost us at least a split with Jacksonville or Tennessee.
Not 3-13??
Who are you and what have you done with Kerns??
Bacon tastes good... Pork chops taste good.
3-13 is my job now...
You can't fix Dumb or being a VYFB
by Texans-Brocos on Aug 3, 2011 4:02 PM CDT up reply actions
Boy, you really don't come around here much anymore, huh Beef?
I was negative, then became indifferent and have been pretty positive since the Wade hiring. Aaron has taken possession of all my negative energy.
Mike Kerns is all about positivity and shit now
This is the first sign of the Texocalypse
"All our lives, we’re taught to get in line. The ones who conform never discover."-Arian Foster
sǝɹnʇɐuƃıs uʍop ǝpısdn ʇnoqɐ sʇuǝɯɯoɔ ǝuo ou
by Barryfromtexas on Aug 3, 2011 6:03 PM CDT up reply actions
That fucker was in Cabo.
Lucky bastard.
Capt. Nately: You're a shameful opportunist! What you don't understand is that it's better to die on your feet than to live on your knees.
Old man in whorehouse: You have it backwards. It's better to live on your feet than to die on your knees. I know.
-Catch 22-
Can't figure out the link
so it’s titled “Free cookies to all who oblige by reading, aka my completely useless predictions”
/NUTT'D
Canal Street Chronicles-A place of great Saints news and information. Oh and the stuff I write!
"I rejected those answers. Instead, I chose something different. I chose the impossible. I chose...Rapture!"
Wanted to let you know
I updated the picture post. I added about 25 pics from Day 3 of camp!
by Da babyfacedassassin Meco on Aug 3, 2011 1:43 PM CDT reply actions
Ah, pre-preseason
That time of year where the beer goggles (or Zima goggles, as the case may be) are glued to our collective faces.
I voted 9-7, thinking I was being optimistic, then saw that, including my vote, 83% of the votes had us at 10-6 or better.
"A threat is about a verb short of a win..." - TEXSON
for the record, I agree with most of this
but think the Steelers will beat us on the road, and there’s no way in hell we go 5-1 in the division. I’ll take us splitting with Jacksonville, who I think is going to be better than most people around here seem to give them credit for.
"A threat is about a verb short of a win..." - TEXSON
Impressive
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by MDC on Aug 3, 2011 1:59 PM CDT up reply actions
I'm going to go with 10-6 with a possible 11-5
Although I think we should sweep the Jags and Tits, I think its only the tits we manage to. So one loss to the Jags. I think our other losses come to: Indy once, Pitt, Baltimore, Atlanta, New Orleans. All in all, the schedule is favorable.
I wish we could hire coaches without "having grown up in Houston" being a job requirement.
I voted 9-7
I think the transition on defense is going to be a little more difficult than we anticipate, especially with players changing positions and players coming off of injuries. I do think we beat the Colts in week 1, but I’m preparing myself for some letdowns in other games.
We’re just not a strong enough team yet to hold ourselves to only 5 losses. We’re on our way, but I don’t think we’re there.
Its a QB driven league
We will go as far as Schaub takes us.
I went with
11-5, but I could see anything from 13-3 to 9-7. A lot will depend on how well this defense does and who, if anyone gets injured.
PFT
They say as of Tuesday we are 8.5 mil over cap
by TexansForLife on Aug 3, 2011 2:05 PM CDT via mobile reply actions
Now, buttermilk biscuits here we go SIFT the flour roll the dough Clap your hands and stomp your feet Move your butt to the funky beat (huh huh)
"If my hips had pockets, I wouldn't wear pants at all." @NotBurtReynolds
You just made my day.
The judges also would have accepted a selection from “Posse’s On Broadyway.”
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"MDC: Droppin' knowledge like a librarian with Parkinson's." --Jonathan Loesche
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"Not to completely equate marriage to fandom, but both rely on suspended insanity a bit." --beefy
by MDC on Aug 3, 2011 3:42 PM CDT up reply actions
Nah, Attack on the Stars
Nuclear warhead/aimed atcher forehead/your girl calls my name in your bed
"A threat is about a verb short of a win..." - TEXSON
Hip Hop Soldier also underrated
"A threat is about a verb short of a win..." - TEXSON
I'll take 11-5
Only because the world is ending next year so if we’re going to do it, it has to be now.
I'm a man!! I'm forty!!
I went with 12-4
I dont think we’ll lose to tampa….but the other games are pretty solid predictions.
Get hype!!
I say 10-6
And the division. Because Five-Head’s reign has to end sometime!
Houston Texans fan, first and foremost.
College football teams: Army, Syracuse, Texas, Auburn.
Oh, and don't hate on Sir Mix-A-Lot
Because Houston, Texas rocks to the Square Dance Rap!
Houston Texans fan, first and foremost.
College football teams: Army, Syracuse, Texas, Auburn.
I love Sir Mix-A-Lot
Seriously. I had S.W.A.S.S., Seminar, Mack Daddy, and Chief Boot Knocka.
The Two-Day Hangover @ SBN Houston | Twitter
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"MDC: Droppin' knowledge like a librarian with Parkinson's." --Jonathan Loesche
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"Not to completely equate marriage to fandom, but both rely on suspended insanity a bit." --beefy
by MDC on Aug 3, 2011 3:44 PM CDT up reply actions
Now buttermilk biscuits
Here we go sift the flour roll the dough
www.TheDreamShake.com Co-Founder and Writer
12-4. Texans storm into the playoffs, only to lose the first game. Baby steps, baby steps.
by Stupendous Man on Aug 3, 2011 2:37 PM CDT via mobile reply actions
Great write up!
I’m going with 12-4
We sweep the Colts and the BE-SFs, and split the Jags winning our first division title and playoff birth!
Our other three losses are: @Saints, @Ravens, and @Tampa (overtime killed by a kicker!)
Our best game of the season (pre-playoffs) is at home where we absolutely destroy the Steelers 35-6 (two field goals)!!
Whoa...
destroying the Steelers is some serious optimism! I’m guessing you re-upped your season tickets?
Hey, let him dream.
Because I dream the same thing.
Despite my better judgment, a manager at Battle Red Blog.
Supreme Galactic Editor of Battle Red Onion.
I am a visionary, I am a genius, and now I am angry! Now where are those pants at?!
Football is war by other means. - Carl von Clausewitz...sorta.
by UprootedTexan on Aug 3, 2011 2:47 PM CDT up reply actions
I should say, mostly because I hate the Steelers with the fire and intensity of a thousand suns.
Despite my better judgment, a manager at Battle Red Blog.
Supreme Galactic Editor of Battle Red Onion.
I am a visionary, I am a genius, and now I am angry! Now where are those pants at?!
Football is war by other means. - Carl von Clausewitz...sorta.
by UprootedTexan on Aug 3, 2011 3:12 PM CDT up reply actions
I seriously don't think the Stealers Match up well with us
teh Schaub will exploit Ike Taylor all day – and those that wanted that guy will be doubly glad we didn’t get him
"All our lives, we’re taught to get in line. The ones who conform never discover."-Arian Foster
sǝɹnʇɐuƃıs uʍop ǝpısdn ʇnoqɐ sʇuǝɯɯoɔ ǝuo ou
by Barryfromtexas on Aug 3, 2011 6:10 PM CDT up reply actions
going same as last year...
12-4, 6-2 in the division. one loss to the colts, and i think we split with the jags (as always)
"It's very SIMPLE angela!!!!! LOOK AT WHAT I'M DOING... AND GO TELL SOMEBODY IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!" - Andy
@doobieman21
youtube/chrisdogan
Oh shit.
We have a five team division!? Ugh it’s like the NL Central of the NFL.
by DisplacedTexan on Aug 3, 2011 3:05 PM CDT up reply actions
6-2 in a four team division?
That’s REALLY impressive.
Despite my better judgment, a manager at Battle Red Blog.
Supreme Galactic Editor of Battle Red Onion.
I am a visionary, I am a genius, and now I am angry! Now where are those pants at?!
Football is war by other means. - Carl von Clausewitz...sorta.
by UprootedTexan on Aug 3, 2011 3:13 PM CDT up reply actions
dammit.
too many cookies?
"It's very SIMPLE angela!!!!! LOOK AT WHAT I'M DOING... AND GO TELL SOMEBODY IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!" - Andy
@doobieman21
youtube/chrisdogan
i meant 4-2!
haha
"It's very SIMPLE angela!!!!! LOOK AT WHAT I'M DOING... AND GO TELL SOMEBODY IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!" - Andy
@doobieman21
youtube/chrisdogan
Fuck it I said 12-4
I belive we get payback for the Monday night game against Baltimore and that ass whopping we got from Pitt a few years back. I think we win the New Orleans game also. I honestly dont have that awh shit here we go felling this year looking at our schedule I really belive we can win all those games or at least be in a position to win all those games.
So lets do this shit and kick some ass. Texans win the AFC South
by jtr bmf 281 on Aug 3, 2011 3:15 PM CDT reply actions 1 recs
i picked 5 - 11 or worse.
every year ive been optimistic they’ve let me down. Every time I’m negative they,ve proven me right. So I feel safe with this prediction.
Here is how things are gonna go: We are gonna go 1-3 to start the season off but people will question whether Kubiak should stay head coach or if Phillips should take over. Once that question is asked this team will lose its focus and the locker room will be divided. as such i see us going 2 – 10 down the stretch.
I also expect injuries to our players that we won’t be able to overcome and that will be the final nail in the coffin.
Feeling the five stages of grief since 2002.
by NoSafetiesNeeded on Aug 3, 2011 3:21 PM CDT reply actions
Please Log Out To Change Your User Name
After you log out, you should be able to log in using your new user name.
Looking forward to a day when being a Texans fan doesn't mean that April is the highlight of my season...
by Tim on Aug 3, 2011 3:27 PM CDT via mobile up reply actions
I was just thinking that...
"Hakeem couldn't kick your ass cuz you were too
close kissin his!"- Sir Charles to Kenny Smith.
by bone31crusher on Aug 3, 2011 3:42 PM CDT up reply actions
Not illegal...
But we have to consider search engines and the site being blocked by certain filters.
A Texans fan. Really. No, I'm not kidding.
http://www.battleredblog.com
"Blind fandom is all I got left." - LoneSpot
Like all the other crap won't block it?
/facetiousness
"All our lives, we’re taught to get in line. The ones who conform never discover."-Arian Foster
sǝɹnʇɐuƃıs uʍop ǝpısdn ʇnoqɐ sʇuǝɯɯoɔ ǝuo ou
by Barryfromtexas on Aug 3, 2011 6:12 PM CDT up reply actions
Have you tried to just make a new account?
and the clouds opened up and God said "I Hate you Texans Fans."
This dilemma is actually quite funny.
"Hakeem couldn't kick your ass cuz you were too
close kissin his!"- Sir Charles to Kenny Smith.
by bone31crusher on Aug 3, 2011 3:43 PM CDT up reply actions
does it feature Kelly Rowland?
The Two-Day Hangover @ SBN Houston | Twitter
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"MDC: Droppin' knowledge like a librarian with Parkinson's." --Jonathan Loesche
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"Not to completely equate marriage to fandom, but both rely on suspended insanity a bit." --beefy
by MDC on Aug 3, 2011 3:45 PM CDT up reply actions
I Just E-Mailed IT
I’d ask that you shoot them an e-mail as well. The address is support@sbnation.com. Thanks.
Looking forward to a day when being a Texans fan doesn't mean that April is the highlight of my season...
by Tim on Aug 3, 2011 4:09 PM CDT up reply actions
You should only have to log out
Then login using FU Nnamdi with the same password. You should be set after that (according to them).
A Texans fan. Really. No, I'm not kidding.
http://www.battleredblog.com
"Blind fandom is all I got left." - LoneSpot
To be clear
In the upper right hand corner, there’s a log out button. Hit that, change your user name, and you’re good to go.
A Texans fan. Really. No, I'm not kidding.
http://www.battleredblog.com
"Blind fandom is all I got left." - LoneSpot
Also be sure you have your computers MAC address handy
and don’t forget to set your router to a static IP rather than dynamic.
That - or get a Flux Capacitor and go back and re-do it
"All our lives, we’re taught to get in line. The ones who conform never discover."-Arian Foster
sǝɹnʇɐuƃıs uʍop ǝpısdn ʇnoqɐ sʇuǝɯɯoɔ ǝuo ou
by Barryfromtexas on Aug 3, 2011 6:14 PM CDT up reply actions
You didn't find another in Storage wars?
"All our lives, we’re taught to get in line. The ones who conform never discover."-Arian Foster
sǝɹnʇɐuƃıs uʍop ǝpısdn ʇnoqɐ sʇuǝɯɯoɔ ǝuo ou
by Barryfromtexas on Aug 3, 2011 6:22 PM CDT up reply actions
But it's deep in the woods...
…so you have to hope that it shows up on Dual Survival…
Maybe Cody will cut his foot on it…
"Thank you for setting us straight on that Mr. Lombardi...Your cogent use of logical argument backed by your impressive knowledge of the smallest details of the modern professional game has made believers of us all."
- tehGrindCrusher
If Logging Out And Then Logging In With Your New User Name Doesn't Work
Just tell them what you’re trying to do and include the name you’re trying to change and what you’re trying to change it to.
Looking forward to a day when being a Texans fan doesn't mean that April is the highlight of my season...
by Tim on Aug 3, 2011 4:27 PM CDT up reply actions
i tried loggin out and logging back in, and u either have to sign in with fuckthejets and my password or create a user account.
when i try create an account, it tells me the email address im usin is already taken. when i try loggin in with facebook, it takes me straight to thr fuckthejets username
i will get my gal to email them. i dont have any clue how to do this kinda shit. i found tis website but she set it up for me. all i kno how to do is type in www.battleredblog.com and log in.
Hey Tim
I do this for a living, may I please help our resident beloved hater of all things Jets and Nnamdi? Lol. Hell, I’ll set him up a nice gmail acct and make everything reeeeeal easy for him. Pretty please? I won’t charge a dime to do it either, not a nickel, not a penny. Nothing. Well, maybe a beer at a future BRB event, lol.
-- "...I was sick, napping, and then woke up and came to the computer to read a note from the Gingered Angel of Doom..." Martek - Dynamo Theory Blog
The Madden Tourney
"All our lives, we’re taught to get in line. The ones who conform never discover."-Arian Foster
sǝɹnʇɐuƃıs uʍop ǝpısdn ʇnoqɐ sʇuǝɯɯoɔ ǝuo ou
by Barryfromtexas on Aug 3, 2011 6:15 PM CDT up reply actions
I think there is going to be a get together like last year
To watch one of the pre-season games at a bar.
Last year it was in Midtown
but if I had to guess, I’d say 360 Sports Lounge on Washington and Heights. I think a friend of Tim’s owns it. Tim did say he was going to put something together.
You Guess Right, Whiskey
I’ll have something official to announce in the next week or so, but I’m aiming for a preseason watch party for Texans-Niners on August 27th.
Looking forward to a day when being a Texans fan doesn't mean that April is the highlight of my season...
by Tim on Aug 3, 2011 9:07 PM CDT up reply actions
I Will Gladly Buy You A Beer
Just for offering. Come on out to 360 on Saturday afternoon.
Looking forward to a day when being a Texans fan doesn't mean that April is the highlight of my season...
by Tim on Aug 3, 2011 9:06 PM CDT up reply actions
I would take you up on that beer
if I wasn’t lying on the beach somewhere on the Atlantic Ocean…..
I didn't do anything wrong!.... and, I won't do it again.
there u go timmy. crisis deverted. can i call u timmy??
by F-BombTheJets on Aug 3, 2011 7:26 PM CDT up reply actions
Three thumbs up
Thank you.
A Texans fan. Really. No, I'm not kidding.
http://www.battleredblog.com
"Blind fandom is all I got left." - LoneSpot
Your third thumb doesn't look like a thumb.
Capt. Nately: You're a shameful opportunist! What you don't understand is that it's better to die on your feet than to live on your knees.
Old man in whorehouse: You have it backwards. It's better to live on your feet than to die on your knees. I know.
-Catch 22-
Something about his last post and looking in his lap
"All our lives, we’re taught to get in line. The ones who conform never discover."-Arian Foster
sǝɹnʇɐuƃıs uʍop ǝpısdn ʇnoqɐ sʇuǝɯɯoɔ ǝuo ou
by Barryfromtexas on Aug 3, 2011 10:50 PM CDT up reply actions
...or "up"...
"Thank you for setting us straight on that Mr. Lombardi...Your cogent use of logical argument backed by your impressive knowledge of the smallest details of the modern professional game has made believers of us all."
- tehGrindCrusher
Perhaps it should be considered
That IT also hates the Jets.
I wish we could hire coaches without "having grown up in Houston" being a job requirement.
by DaGoaT on Aug 3, 2011 4:18 PM CDT up reply actions 6 recs
That isn't green?
"All our lives, we’re taught to get in line. The ones who conform never discover."-Arian Foster
sǝɹnʇɐuƃıs uʍop ǝpısdn ʇnoqɐ sʇuǝɯɯoɔ ǝuo ou
by Barryfromtexas on Aug 3, 2011 6:16 PM CDT up reply actions
Making it green would support the jets
by Carter Liles on Aug 3, 2011 7:08 PM CDT via mobile up reply actions
No just supporting IT
And ANYONE who hates the Jests
"All our lives, we’re taught to get in line. The ones who conform never discover."-Arian Foster
sǝɹnʇɐuƃıs uʍop ǝpısdn ʇnoqɐ sʇuǝɯɯoɔ ǝuo ou
by Barryfromtexas on Aug 3, 2011 7:30 PM CDT up reply actions
I agree with all of the predictions,
except the Pitt game. I doubt we’re going to win that one.
Therefore, I voted for 10-6.
"Hakeem couldn't kick your ass cuz you were too
close kissin his!"- Sir Charles to Kenny Smith.
i believe in karma.
having said that, durga has beat the SHIT out of the texans emotions for the past 9 years. there is a method to her madness… gold is made from fire. since they’ve lost in every concievable way, i think it’s time to flip the script and start winning in that way now. but just in case i’m wrong.. let’s go unicorn huntin’. this season more than any other let that blood FLOW. bout to get all AZTECKY up in here! mass sacrifices and whatnot!
"It's very SIMPLE angela!!!!! LOOK AT WHAT I'M DOING... AND GO TELL SOMEBODY IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!" - Andy
@doobieman21
youtube/chrisdogan
Listening to Glover Quin's interview about last year's coaching makes me sad....
Apparently, there was no coaching of technique and the coaches basically told them “just go out there and do what you gotta do” Basically just left them on an island to fend for themselves, that’s just horrendous…..
Are you serious???
That would be incredible.
A Texans fan. Really. No, I'm not kidding.
http://www.battleredblog.com
"Blind fandom is all I got left." - LoneSpot
pics or it didn't happen.
in other words…
can i haz a link pleeze?
"It's very SIMPLE angela!!!!! LOOK AT WHAT I'M DOING... AND GO TELL SOMEBODY IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!" - Andy
@doobieman21
youtube/chrisdogan
Yeah I tried putting it in a link on the body
But when I hit post, all it said was “posting..” and froze…. LOL
That explains a lot poor Kareem never had a chance.
and the clouds opened up and God said "I Hate you Texans Fans."
Really?
The interview on HT.com?
If so helps explain why Kareem struggled so bad (besides being a rookie).
Prediction: 11-5 AFC South champions.
Oh I see.
Last year was even more simplistic than I thought. Explains a lot really. In 2009 we had experienced CB’s so that simple system worked a little better that last year.
Plus no more S in the box/dual safeties back is really going to improve the ability for the secondary to cover.
Prediction: 11-5 AFC South champions.
Based off of what he said, the CB's didn't even know if they would have Safety help on plays.
Seriously took away their security blanket and then told them to just “read the QB”
WTF?
ClaytonESPN John Clayton
Now wonder the Raiders are over the cap. They gave Michael Huff four-years, $32 million. Wow
2 minutes ago Favorite Retweet Reply
and the clouds opened up and God said "I Hate you Texans Fans."
Jebus.
It’s the year of the safety (gettin’ paid).
Al Davis is over compensating for Mike Brown's lack of spending in Cincy
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on Aug 4, 2011 12:06 AM CDT up reply actions
Kuharsky
is such a douche. Espn just posted FA grades and gave the Texans a B+ (highest in the AFC), but of course Kuharsky’s stupid ass has to downplay it by only focusing on the negatives “I am in a major wait and see mode” and “Vickers is a drop off from Leach”. That by itself wouldn’t be so bad. BUT, right under us he has only great things to say about the jags and colts (both got C+). About the colts: “The risk/reward seems just right. They’re exploring a different avenue for roster improvement and deserve applause.” About the jags: “I think that’s low (C+). I like what they’ve done. I think a safety combination that won’t include Don Carey will be better. Drew Coleman is a flexible veteran corner who should upgrade the nickel. And I think the front seven is much stronger, which should mean quarterbacks have less time.” And the tits, well they are just the tits, and hasslebeck is their QB…..
Give me a break Kuharsky. We murdered the rest of the AFC south in FA.
by Da babyfacedassassin Meco on Aug 3, 2011 4:24 PM CDT reply actions
/facepalm
"All our lives, we’re taught to get in line. The ones who conform never discover."-Arian Foster
sǝɹnʇɐuƃıs uʍop ǝpısdn ʇnoqɐ sʇuǝɯɯoɔ ǝuo ou
by Barryfromtexas on Aug 3, 2011 6:19 PM CDT up reply actions
Thats ok let them underestimate us
That way it will be even funnier when they all jump on the Texans bandwagon in midseason.
I think the only team we need to worry about is Jacksonville.
And thats just because they are underestimated as well. I think they will be a thorn in our side for the next couple years they always play us hard it’s usally never a blowout unless it’s the final game and the Jag’s just give up like they have in the few years we finished our season against them. The Colts are starting to lose ther mojo you can just sence it. And the Titans suck and will alway’s suck. In my eyes anyway.
First time poster
Been lurking on an off for months just never got around to signing up. anyways I think the Texans have the talent to go 16-0 (albeit I’m likely to get diabetes my thoughts are so sweet) In my ever so humble opinion new coaching, a stronger secondary and hopefully a more confident team can and should easily be able to go 11-5 on our schedule. Our offense is lethal our defense should be streets ahead and before i start going in circles I’m balls deep in optimism dooooon’t let me down kubiack
by BC5 on Aug 3, 2011 5:22 PM CDT reply actions 9 recs
Welcome. Here's a rec for you
I like the 16-0 talk tho. Very sweet indeed
Follow me on twitter: @Super_Stud2100
i align with your sentiments
also welcome rec
"We're goin with what we got"
by silentassassin on Aug 3, 2011 5:41 PM CDT up reply actions
Welcome
And an optimistic rec for yoou
"All our lives, we’re taught to get in line. The ones who conform never discover."-Arian Foster
sǝɹnʇɐuƃıs uʍop ǝpısdn ʇnoqɐ sʇuǝɯɯoɔ ǝuo ou
by Barryfromtexas on Aug 3, 2011 6:21 PM CDT up reply actions
Welcome, BC5
Glad you finally got around to signing up.
Looking forward to a day when being a Texans fan doesn't mean that April is the highlight of my season...
by Tim on Aug 3, 2011 9:05 PM CDT up reply actions
Probably not.
Going back farther though, the Txans never really had that problem until last year, so it’s probably just an anomaly that’ll correct itself by itself. We’ll see I guess
"A threat is about a verb short of a win..." - TEXSON
Damn folk's I just got a chubby
I veiwed my calender on my cable box and I seen NFL Football sheduled for 8/11. Thats next Thursday! Holy shit we are almost their.
Okay
Tell me all about it, I’m listening….
I didn't do anything wrong!.... and, I won't do it again.
If 10-6 makes the playoffs, we're now up to 84% of Texans fans believing we'll make the playoffs this year.
I wonder what that number is for Cleveland fans or Arizona fans, (or whoever, I’m honestly curious)
"A threat is about a verb short of a win..." - TEXSON
or Texans fans in previous years, I looked around a bit but couldn't find any polls
"A threat is about a verb short of a win..." - TEXSON
we can take the saints and bucs games
and go 13-3
im not sure why everyone has us losing to the saints, but i think we can go in and dominate them
I have us starting slow but finishing strong
I think we struggle early. With so many players either rookies, new to the team, or playing in a new position or scheme, I think it is too much to expect them to beat solid teams like Indy, N.O., Pitts, and Balt right out of the gate. I think we are in all the games but still start out in a 2-4 hole.
But after that we start to gel and hit some easier teams. I think we win the next 5 vs. Tenn, Jax, Cleve, TB, and Jax again.
I think we get a little overconfident and lose to Atlanta, but beat Cincy and Carolina. I think we probably lose to an Indy team at home, fighting for the playoffs and finish with a win over Tenn.
Overall record 10-6, hopefully good enough for the playoffs.
What I wonder is
Why does almost everyone think we lose to the Ravens and Stealers?
They are good teams. We showed last year that the Ravens could be beat – we just muffed it. The Stealers do not match up well with us at all. I originally agreed that we go 11-5 but after all I see, I am leaning more to the 14-2, then again maybe that’s the vodka talking
"All our lives, we’re taught to get in line. The ones who conform never discover."-Arian Foster
sǝɹnʇɐuƃıs uʍop ǝpısdn ʇnoqɐ sʇuǝɯɯoɔ ǝuo ou
I forgot to mention players coming back injuries too.
I agree about the Ravens, I think it will be very close, and if we played them later they couldnt beat us, but on the Steelers, I dont think we match up well. We don’t do well with strong mobile qb’s, and that defense doesnt give many openings. They provide lots of pressure and cover the short routes, and dare you to go long. Schaub just doesn’t have the arm for those long, off-balance throws.
And do you ever notice
when the other team pressures Schaub, how conservative Gary gets with his play calling? The passes get shorter and shorter and eventually a cb steps in front on a flat pass for a pick 6. Everyone blames Schaub, but I blame the #$&*# conservative play calling.
Sorta have to...
Zone blocking is nice for a lot of things, but our offensive line doesn’t hold up long against a high-pressure defense. Definitely need more screen passes though; that’s the only way to keep a defense like that off-balance.
5-11
Capt. Nately: You're a shameful opportunist! What you don't understand is that it's better to die on your feet than to live on your knees.
Old man in whorehouse: You have it backwards. It's better to live on your feet than to die on your knees. I know.
-Catch 22-
He wasn't asking for the Jests record
"All our lives, we’re taught to get in line. The ones who conform never discover."-Arian Foster
sǝɹnʇɐuƃıs uʍop ǝpısdn ʇnoqɐ sʇuǝɯɯoɔ ǝuo ou
by Barryfromtexas on Aug 3, 2011 10:52 PM CDT up reply actions
Jordan must be dsylexic
Cause I know he meant to say 11-5
Who are you and what have you done with Jordann?
We are looking for a new PUNter!!! That has to be an omen of good things to come!
"Thank you for setting us straight on that Mr. Lombardi...Your cogent use of logical argument backed by your impressive knowledge of the smallest details of the modern professional game has made believers of us all."
- tehGrindCrusher
I dont like the predictions of us losing to both Bal and Pitt
We have to beat one of those teams. Think about it, more likely than not the wild card is coming out of that division
Follow me on twitter: @Super_Stud2100
BAL
So what do u guys think about the pollard vs hou matchup now that he’s with the ravens??
TEs and Slot receivers scoring at will
"All our lives, we’re taught to get in line. The ones who conform never discover."-Arian Foster
ɔıןןıɹʎɔ ʇou sı ǝdʎʇ uʍop ǝpısdn
by Barryfromtexas on Aug 4, 2011 11:41 AM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
Is he going to start?
I thought I read somewhere that they were expecting to promote Tommy Z to a starting spot?
With the draft, FA and new coaching I dont see a game we cant win, not a scarry game in the lot.
That being said and this is the Texans were talking about there will be fluke bounces, missed kicks and pick 6s at the wrong moment. 10-6 and we make the playoffs and win atleast 1 playoff game
Wow... winnning a playoff game... nice...
I’m just hoping for an appearance… Getting that first win out of the way would be a real nice bonus.
"Thank you for setting us straight on that Mr. Lombardi...Your cogent use of logical argument backed by your impressive knowledge of the smallest details of the modern professional game has made believers of us all."
- tehGrindCrusher
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