With Apologies To Thomas Jefferson, A Reminder About BRB Community Guidelines
by Tim on Sep 5, 2011 8:30 PM CDT
in News
Email
PrintEvery once in awhile, the tree of BRB must be refreshed with the blood of wayward commenters a friendly reminder that there are rules (gasp!) at BRB. Crazy, I know. I hate being a school marm, and I absolutely loathe having to warn or ban anyone. That's not why BRB exists. It's a place for Texans fans to talk Texans football. While that purpose seems harmless enough, it can occasionally fall victim to passion or disagreement.
Thus, I've adjusted the community guidelines new users have to agree to abide by when they sign up for an account, and I'd ask our current readers to familiarize themselves with the new gospel. After the jump, of course.
The new guidelines, as they were handed down to me by me:
No, and we mean NO, personal attacks. Express disagreement about what's written all you want; that's what this forum is for. But the second you start attacking the person who wrote it, we reserve the right to ask you to move along.
Additional rule: This.
We're awfully tolerant around these parts, yet every case is unique. Please don't make us hate ourselves for infringing upon your right to freely express yourself. We'll do it. We won't like doing it, but we'll do it.
If you see a fire, don't throw gasoline on it. Just e-mail us (see the bottom of the front page for relevant contact information). We'll get it corrected as best we can as soon as we can.
Bottom line: As my grandfather used to say, be a regular guy. Thank you for your consideration.
With the regular season less than a week away, we'll probably see a rise in new users and an increase in passionate rhetoric. Those are good things, and I'm excited to see BRB become an even better place to talk Texans as a result of both.
BRB is what it is because of everyone who takes the time to read or, even better, comment/post. Please do what you can to keep the atmosphere above board. That means that attacking other community members is prohibited. Yes, even if they're fans of other teams, or if you disagree with what they wrote. There's never a reason for things to devolve into name-calling. Let's be adults here.
Questions? Concerns? Criticism? E-mail me.
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Comments
Spoken like a true blue Cowgirls fan !!!
by nums1960 on Sep 5, 2011 9:14 PM CDT up reply actions 13 recs
Is this considered a personal attack?
If not, that pretty close. That’s a low blow there
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on Sep 5, 2011 9:15 PM CDT up reply actions
Newb RECC First shot over the bow!!
'Without change something sleeps inside us, and seldom awakens. The sleeper must awaken.' -Frank Herbert
A...and welcome num1960
'Without change something sleeps inside us, and seldom awakens. The sleeper must awaken.' -Frank Herbert
We were just having a conversation about diversity and the Golden Rule.
'Without change something sleeps inside us, and seldom awakens. The sleeper must awaken.' -Frank Herbert
haha
Joe, your sig is much like the last line in my sig. I love it
"Taco Joe - the beacon of optimism" TexansDC
"Great, you've doomed us all!" - UprootedTexan
God blessed Texas, but he has forsaken the Texans
Of the many blogs and forums I frequent
This one is actually one of the best behaved. Just about everyone here respects that there are certain lines not to be crossed in friendly company. Sadly, not everyone is as good at self-moderating as the people here are.
And as a moderator elsewhere, my kudos to the staff.
by Jonathan Fosburgh on Sep 5, 2011 8:39 PM CDT reply actions 2 recs
Let's try to make it a couple of months before we have to deal with this again, eh?
Maybe…post a scoreboard, “This site has gone 57 days without spilling the blood of wayward commenters”.
'Without change something sleeps inside us, and seldom awakens. The sleeper must awaken.' -Frank Herbert
Also could people read this too.
http://www.battleredblog.com/2011/8/23/2378986/a-note-on-homophobic-slurs
after reading some TEXANSNUTT’s comments I think its necessary.
and the clouds opened up and God said "I Hate you Texans Fans."
by Joe25 on Sep 5, 2011 8:46 PM CDT reply actions 12 recs
Rec'd
Looking forward to a day when being a Texans fan doesn't mean that April is the highlight of my season...
by Tim on Sep 5, 2011 8:49 PM CDT up reply actions
In Fact...
I just amended the community guidelines again to include that FanPost. Thanks, Joe.
Looking forward to a day when being a Texans fan doesn't mean that April is the highlight of my season...
by Tim on Sep 5, 2011 8:51 PM CDT up reply actions
Oh, he didn't limit his avarice to any articular group. Pretty sure he offended everyone...
'Without change something sleeps inside us, and seldom awakens. The sleeper must awaken.' -Frank Herbert
I'm being good...
Haven’t been banned from anywhere in awhile.
You are banned from Stampede Blue.
You can browse the blog, but you can't participate.
Hi CFHTim. You're trolling yet another SB Nation blog. Since you've been banned from several other SB Nation blogs, you don't get a warning. You get banned. If you want to get unbanned, email BBS and state your case for re-admission.
i was once banned from the ESPN AFC South blog...
cause PK got an attitude with one of my posts and i called him a douche-canoe.
Although....
It is true. That guy cant give the Texans an ounce of credit if it would pardon his mom from a life term in prison. Its nothing but trash from him. So although you are not proud of being banned. The comment was well-deserved on his part. I would have gone with douche-rocket.
by HolyCrapADecentDefense on Sep 5, 2011 11:21 PM CDT up reply actions
Well I am banned from Cowboys, Titans, Colts, and Laker blogs.
Ran out of people to pester
You are banned from Stampede Blue.
You can browse the blog, but you can't participate.
Hi CFHTim. You're trolling yet another SB Nation blog. Since you've been banned from several other SB Nation blogs, you don't get a warning. You get banned. If you want to get unbanned, email BBS and state your case for re-admission.
Not as impressive as Bo$$man's list though
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on Sep 5, 2011 9:03 PM CDT up reply actions
a pristine 32 NFL Team list.
Thank God for football!
by BattleRedHusker on Sep 5, 2011 9:04 PM CDT up reply actions
and a few NBA teams as well
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on Sep 5, 2011 9:04 PM CDT up reply actions
Probably not.
Never use a metaphor, simile, or other figure of speech which you are used to seeing in print.
Never use a long word where a short one will do.
If it is possible to cut a word out, always cut it out.
Never use the passive where you can use the active.
Never use a foreign phrase, a scientific word, or a jargon word if you can think of an everyday English equivalent.
Break any of these rules sooner than say anything outright barbarous.
-Orwell, Politics and the English Language
www.battleredblog.com
by tehGrindCrusher on Sep 6, 2011 1:46 AM CDT up reply actions
Have you tried calling some head bloggers mothers whores?
If that doesn’t work try going to the Giants blog and saying anything other than “GIANTS ARE TEH BESTEST!” That’s usually good for an auto-ban.
I must rule with eye and claw — as the hawk among lesser birds.
-Duke Leto Atreides
by peytonsurdaddy on Sep 6, 2011 6:35 AM CDT up reply actions
Saying that on the Eagles blog not only can get you banned
But it probably can result in you getting hunted down & stoned to death
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on Sep 6, 2011 11:19 AM CDT up reply actions
Actually...
It’s pretty hard to get banned from the Eagles blog.
I must rule with eye and claw — as the hawk among lesser birds.
-Duke Leto Atreides
by peytonsurdaddy on Sep 6, 2011 5:10 PM CDT up reply actions
Banned, probably. Beaten, probably not
Just go Pro-Giants in there
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on Sep 7, 2011 12:34 AM CDT up reply actions
Thats how I roll.
I get along with the Jags bloggers at least.
You are banned from Stampede Blue.
You can browse the blog, but you can't participate.
Hi CFHTim. You're trolling yet another SB Nation blog. Since you've been banned from several other SB Nation blogs, you don't get a warning. You get banned. If you want to get unbanned, email BBS and state your case for re-admission.
Not that hard, there's only three of them at the most
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on Sep 5, 2011 9:05 PM CDT up reply actions
They cool though, all three of them
You are banned from Stampede Blue.
You can browse the blog, but you can't participate.
Hi CFHTim. You're trolling yet another SB Nation blog. Since you've been banned from several other SB Nation blogs, you don't get a warning. You get banned. If you want to get unbanned, email BBS and state your case for re-admission.
Let me guess, you're their grief counselor, huh?
They must be depressed with the inevitable divorce of their team from their city
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on Sep 5, 2011 9:08 PM CDT up reply actions
I try, I know that pain...
You are banned from Stampede Blue.
You can browse the blog, but you can't participate.
Hi CFHTim. You're trolling yet another SB Nation blog. Since you've been banned from several other SB Nation blogs, you don't get a warning. You get banned. If you want to get unbanned, email BBS and state your case for re-admission.
In the settlement, we get to turn the stadium into a waffle house so all is good.
"HULU: An evil plot to destroy the world. Enjoy"
Real fans don’t need a reason.
Is it finally time to draft a QB?
by TheTealDeal on Sep 5, 2011 9:35 PM CDT up reply actions 2 recs
lol...thats the spirit
Im looking for divine and a lttle intervention
And birds dont fly without my permission
Im prolly in the sky, flyin with the fishes
Or maybe in the ocean, swimmin with the pigeons
See my world is different, like Dwayne Wayne
And if you want problem Bit#h, i want the same thang
by F-BombTheJets on Sep 5, 2011 9:40 PM CDT up reply actions
Don't make Night Owl post the epic meal link again...
You are banned from Stampede Blue.
You can browse the blog, but you can't participate.
Hi CFHTim. You're trolling yet another SB Nation blog. Since you've been banned from several other SB Nation blogs, you don't get a warning. You get banned. If you want to get unbanned, email BBS and state your case for re-admission.
Someone say waffles????
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wZDv9pgHp8Q&hd=1
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on Sep 5, 2011 9:50 PM CDT up reply actions
I just got stomach cancer
"HULU: An evil plot to destroy the world. Enjoy"
Real fans don’t need a reason.
Is it finally time to draft a QB?
You sure that wasn't cirrhosis of the liver?
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on Sep 5, 2011 10:02 PM CDT up reply actions
Hey, Teal!
A Texans fan. Really. No, I'm not kidding.
http://www.battleredblog.com
"Blind fandom is all I got left." - LoneSpot
back in the day...
we had trollish tendencies towards those teams.
well….
cowboys, titans and colts anyway.
yamiright?
"It's very SIMPLE angela!!!!! LOOK AT WHAT I'M DOING... AND GO TELL SOMEBODY IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!" - Andy
@doobieman21
youtube/chrisdogan
by chrisd21 on Sep 5, 2011 9:40 PM CDT up reply actions 5 recs
Sho u right !
You are banned from Stampede Blue.
You can browse the blog, but you can't participate.
Hi CFHTim. You're trolling yet another SB Nation blog. Since you've been banned from several other SB Nation blogs, you don't get a warning. You get banned. If you want to get unbanned, email BBS and state your case for re-admission.
nice sig. lol
Michael Jordan - 6 rings
Kobe Bryant - 5 rings
The planet Saturn - 7 rings
Lebron James - a headband
I love Donald Driver.
Thanks
takes bow
You are banned from Stampede Blue.
You can browse the blog, but you can't participate.
Hi CFHTim. You're trolling yet another SB Nation blog. Since you've been banned from several other SB Nation blogs, you don't get a warning. You get banned. If you want to get unbanned, email BBS and state your case for re-admission.
Stampede Blue is a homophobic slur.
Michael Jordan - 6 rings
Kobe Bryant - 5 rings
The planet Saturn - 7 rings
Lebron James - a headband
I love Donald Driver.
Just a reminder
And I’m not jumping on you cuz I don’t know you honestly…
Our head honcho has requested we all refrain from commenting on or about that blog or anyone associated with it. Tim, BRB head honcho, is deserving of us respecting his request. It makes his life easier, and this blog, BRB, much, much better in the long run.
-- "...I was sick, napping, and then woke up and came to the computer to read a note from the Gingered Angel of Doom..." Martek - Dynamo Theory Blog
Sorry
I didn’t know that applied to Stampede Blue. I kid, but thats probably a good idea. I’m sorry. It won’t happen again.
Michael Jordan - 6 rings
Kobe Bryant - 5 rings
The planet Saturn - 7 rings
Lebron James - a headband
I love Donald Driver.
Rec'd!
Capt. Nately: You're a shameful opportunist! What you don't understand is that it's better to die on your feet than to live on your knees.
Old man in whorehouse: You have it backwards. It's better to live on your feet than to die on your knees. I know.
-Catch 22-
You got banned from MCM?
Not surprising, somehow, my fellow MCMers don’t have much of a tolerance for people from other blogs..
Wrecked....
for the “Mars Attacks” reference.
That has to be the most star studded B-movie I have ever seen….Slim Whitman (I think, been awhile since I’ve seen the movie) FTW!
Just my $.02
Even duct tape can't fix stupid
Great stuff
It’s a shame when a few screw it up for the masses. The majority of people I’ve encountered here are awesome. Hoping the transition into the actual football season goes smoothly. We’re all on the same side here, mostly. We should act like it.
How many Biletnikoffs does he have? NOT TWO!
Was too far to huck a beer at a Stro’s player as per bone’s request. Jess (girlfriend) said I was too far, I said challenge accepted, a security guard said guess again.-BD34
I don't comment too much, mainly due to the fact that everyone seems to beat me to the punch
also I’m kinda lazy, but I love this site and the fact that it has new members coming in everyday from all over the country and even the world. I got on this blog after MDC had to shut down DGDB&D ( a tragedy for which I may never recover, where else do you get Matt Stevens’s wife’s hate mail as a post?). Tim you and the other guys like bfd, rivers (before he was famous) and now Vega (more DGDB&D vets? Yes please) makes this site a daily read in my opinon. SBNation has a lot of team blogs but most don’t have the quality of writing or frequency of updates and people should realize that. I mean the only rule we really have is No Personal attacks, that seems pretty simple yet it seems to be violated an awful lot. Most of the regular posters know each other and I even recognize some of you guys and I am not a regular poster. This is the BEST place to talk,discuss, bitch about the Texans, so all you name callers stop screwing around and behave yourself.
by Draco on Sep 5, 2011 8:56 PM CDT reply actions 14 recs
+1
Mario Williams will have 4 sacks and 1 int by Game 4 of the regular season.
by Barryfromtexas on Sep 5, 2011 8:59 PM CDT up reply actions
I feel the same.
I think we are at the upper echelon of the SBN bloggisphere due to the fact that we are such a marginally followed team that there are so few places dedicated to the Texans. the NFL.com and Mothership message boards don’t count for various obvious reasons.
Thank God for football!
by BattleRedHusker on Sep 5, 2011 9:06 PM CDT up reply actions
SCREW YOU!
/joking
I must rule with eye and claw — as the hawk among lesser birds.
-Duke Leto Atreides
by peytonsurdaddy on Sep 5, 2011 9:10 PM CDT up reply actions
Its ok Colts fans
I know your horror story about your own blog, it just makes it more fun for me reading y’alls comments
I'm glad we can provide you guys with some entertainment.
Tim demands that we dance like monkeys for him and his followers or we’re out on the street. Oh well, it’s still better than my day job.
I must rule with eye and claw — as the hawk among lesser birds.
-Duke Leto Atreides
by peytonsurdaddy on Sep 5, 2011 9:21 PM CDT up reply actions 4 recs
is your day job being Bill Polian's fluffer?
Cause that WOULD suck
by Draco on Sep 5, 2011 9:23 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
Whaddabout Polian trying to keep up with that nut case, Irsay.
…is this where I post his hundreds of inane,indiscernable tweets to allow everyone to decide for themselves…
'Without change something sleeps inside us, and seldom awakens. The sleeper must awaken.' -Frank Herbert
You wish your owner was on acid all the time.
Jealousy rears its ugly head…
I must rule with eye and claw — as the hawk among lesser birds.
-Duke Leto Atreides
by peytonsurdaddy on Sep 5, 2011 9:29 PM CDT up reply actions
Okay. I know the suspense is killing everybody.....
/throws bone of contention.
'Without change something sleeps inside us, and seldom awakens. The sleeper must awaken.' -Frank Herbert
Dude...do you know how to read?
http://www.battleredblog.com/2011/5/23/2183150/site-news-detente
/not trying to be inflammatory
Canal Street Chronicles-A place of great Saints news and information. Oh and the stuff I write!
Bring back Aaron Brooks! He's the only one who can save us from the evil that is Drew Brees!!
by Jon Banks on Sep 5, 2011 9:32 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
Pretty sure PUD finds the humor in Irsay's tweets.
No offense intended to be sure. I think he nailed it on the head with that jealousy remark.
'Without change something sleeps inside us, and seldom awakens. The sleeper must awaken.' -Frank Herbert
You can't link/talk about that blog or it's blogmaster.
Canal Street Chronicles-A place of great Saints news and information. Oh and the stuff I write!
Bring back Aaron Brooks! He's the only one who can save us from the evil that is Drew Brees!!
Ouch. A public site...nevermind. I submit to the force...
/awaits the decision of the council.
'Without change something sleeps inside us, and seldom awakens. The sleeper must awaken.' -Frank Herbert
So steering ever so clearly around the elephant (pick your own color) in the room...
Must have been extremely clear in your mind there was an issue…
Never Mind!
'Without change something sleeps inside us, and seldom awakens. The sleeper must awaken.' -Frank Herbert
i always wanted to see a red elephant. my hypothetical elephant shall be red. im like a God in this world
Im looking for divine and a lttle intervention
And birds dont fly without my permission
Im prolly in the sky, flyin with the fishes
Or maybe in the ocean, swimmin with the pigeons
See my world is different, like Dwayne Wayne
And if you want problem Bit#h, i want the same thang
by F-BombTheJets on Sep 5, 2011 9:55 PM CDT up reply actions
banksy did that a few years back at an art exhibit
" I for one, welcome our new Buffalo overlords. " - Whokebe
I'll have you know I'm PROUD to be Bill's fluffer!
HE IS A BEAUTIFUL, BEAUTIFUL MAN!
I must rule with eye and claw — as the hawk among lesser birds.
-Duke Leto Atreides
by peytonsurdaddy on Sep 5, 2011 9:28 PM CDT up reply actions
Actually Tim just demands that you dance...
…that whole “like Monkeys” thing was just your natural style.
"Suck it, Jim Tressel, you filthy, cheating, unfashionable piece of monkey scrotum."
- MDC
"Let’s leave all the football talk to knowledgeable experts who have played the game, like Matt Millen and Emmitt Smith."
-tehGrindCrusher
by DilloTex on Sep 5, 2011 10:25 PM CDT up reply actions 2 recs
Texans do good web
I think the mothership was voted best website of the NFL teams (obviously due to the cheerleader section), and this is by far the best SBNation site (but we do need more cheerleaders)
I second all the MDC stuff. This place takes up way too much of my time because of all the good people that run this joint.
my Z key can't take another free agent flurry
We know how to make up for it
We have plenty of Eyebleach available at all times
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on Sep 5, 2011 9:14 PM CDT up reply actions
absolutely the best
read it every day. Never joined a blog before, but felt impelled to join like minded intellectuals. Oh yeah we go 13 &3. That’s right, I said it.
no matter how bad they play, no matter how stupid they act, I still love my texans!
by trutxfan on Sep 6, 2011 10:03 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
ok seriously...
what does DGDB&D stand for? (I’m kinda new)
Do you really think a QB looks up from the line and says "Oh, I don't have to worry about that 6'7 280 pound man over there. He has no sacks and is a terrible line backer!"
Da Good Da Bad & Demeco
It was a texans blog that was written by MDC who is a part-time blogger here
DaGood, DaBad, DeMeco
Capt. Nately: You're a shameful opportunist! What you don't understand is that it's better to die on your feet than to live on your knees.
Old man in whorehouse: You have it backwards. It's better to live on your feet than to die on your knees. I know.
-Catch 22-
Da Good Da Bad and DeMeco.
MDC’s Texans’ blog before he joined BRB.
Despite my better judgment, a manager at Battle Red Blog.
Supreme Galactic Editor of Battle Red Onion.
I am a visionary, I am a genius, and now I am angry! Now where are those pants at?!
Football is war by other means. - Carl von Clausewitz...sorta.
by UprootedTexan on Sep 5, 2011 9:55 PM CDT up reply actions
I am tempted to say it one more time
:)
Mario Williams will have 4 sacks and 1 int by Game 4 of the regular season.
by Barryfromtexas on Sep 5, 2011 10:12 PM CDT up reply actions
WHAT ABOUT ME??????!?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
A Texans fan. Really. No, I'm not kidding.
http://www.battleredblog.com
"Blind fandom is all I got left." - LoneSpot
It's allllways about you, isn't it...
You sure does love you some you.
"Suck it, Jim Tressel, you filthy, cheating, unfashionable piece of monkey scrotum."
- MDC
"Let’s leave all the football talk to knowledgeable experts who have played the game, like Matt Millen and Emmitt Smith."
-tehGrindCrusher
LULZ
Love the new writer’s titles.
Canal Street Chronicles-A place of great Saints news and information. Oh and the stuff I write!
Bring back Aaron Brooks! He's the only one who can save us from the evil that is Drew Brees!!
by Jon Banks on Sep 5, 2011 9:31 PM CDT reply actions 10 recs
LMAO!
That’s awesome!
I must rule with eye and claw — as the hawk among lesser birds.
-Duke Leto Atreides
by peytonsurdaddy on Sep 5, 2011 9:32 PM CDT up reply actions
I noticed that when he said scroll down
teh awesomeness
Capt. Nately: You're a shameful opportunist! What you don't understand is that it's better to die on your feet than to live on your knees.
Old man in whorehouse: You have it backwards. It's better to live on your feet than to die on your knees. I know.
-Catch 22-
I wish our writers had new titties
the old ones are a bit boring
does that mean u have the best boobs?
Im looking for divine and a lttle intervention
And birds dont fly without my permission
Im prolly in the sky, flyin with the fishes
Or maybe in the ocean, swimmin with the pigeons
See my world is different, like Dwayne Wayne
And if you want problem Bit#h, i want the same thang
by F-BombTheJets on Sep 5, 2011 10:42 PM CDT up reply actions
I think that title goes to bfd
Forever.
Never use a metaphor, simile, or other figure of speech which you are used to seeing in print.
Never use a long word where a short one will do.
If it is possible to cut a word out, always cut it out.
Never use the passive where you can use the active.
Never use a foreign phrase, a scientific word, or a jargon word if you can think of an everyday English equivalent.
Break any of these rules sooner than say anything outright barbarous.
-Orwell, Politics and the English Language
www.battleredblog.com
by tehGrindCrusher on Sep 6, 2011 3:20 AM CDT up reply actions
Normally, F-Bombs comment would offend me
But, sadly, I’m down to an A-cup these days. I just wish the stupid knees would pay attention to all the lost weight.
A Texans fan. Really. No, I'm not kidding.
http://www.battleredblog.com
"Blind fandom is all I got left." - LoneSpot
Big Svelt Drunk?
Blind fandom is all I got left.
"Down to clown with some other chick's lady bits" ~ MDC
Probably will have to go with Bodacious Fine Drunk...
…in order to keep his initials.
"Suck it, Jim Tressel, you filthy, cheating, unfashionable piece of monkey scrotum."
- MDC
"Let’s leave all the football talk to knowledgeable experts who have played the game, like Matt Millen and Emmitt Smith."
-tehGrindCrusher
/extends apology once more
//puts gas in car instead of dousing the fire with it
Capt. Nately: You're a shameful opportunist! What you don't understand is that it's better to die on your feet than to live on your knees.
Old man in whorehouse: You have it backwards. It's better to live on your feet than to die on your knees. I know.
-Catch 22-
A beautiful thing to behold...
…and I, for one, am thankful for our Panda Vigilante…
"Suck it, Jim Tressel, you filthy, cheating, unfashionable piece of monkey scrotum."
- MDC
"Let’s leave all the football talk to knowledgeable experts who have played the game, like Matt Millen and Emmitt Smith."
-tehGrindCrusher
/Looks at new title.
Tim, I think you spelled “minion” wrong.
Despite my better judgment, a manager at Battle Red Blog.
Supreme Galactic Editor of Battle Red Onion.
I am a visionary, I am a genius, and now I am angry! Now where are those pants at?!
Football is war by other means. - Carl von Clausewitz...sorta.
I must be confused
It’s a place for Texans fans to talk Texans football.
I thought this was a gathering place for Colts fans in the witness protection program.
Team Okpokowuruk
"Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines."
by ct17 on Sep 5, 2011 10:20 PM CDT reply actions 4 recs
Yep, you're confused
We offer no protection whatsoever. I’d sell PUD for a Curs Light if I could.
A Texans fan. Really. No, I'm not kidding.
http://www.battleredblog.com
"Blind fandom is all I got left." - LoneSpot
Tim would sell all of them for the location of a nearby Zima stash
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on Sep 5, 2011 10:23 PM CDT up reply actions
to be honest
Tim would sell all of us for a nearby Zima stash
I miss my kittens.
A Texans fan. Really. No, I'm not kidding.
http://www.battleredblog.com
"Blind fandom is all I got left." - LoneSpot
You give and you give and you give....
"Suck it, Jim Tressel, you filthy, cheating, unfashionable piece of monkey scrotum."
- MDC
"Let’s leave all the football talk to knowledgeable experts who have played the game, like Matt Millen and Emmitt Smith."
-tehGrindCrusher
You guys play Fallout 3?
so i’m thinking that the Vaults were Tim’s underground stashes, and that nuclear war occurred. once the fallout cleared to safe levels, Tim began roaming the wasteland. Remember finding all those empty bottles on your journey? thats right. Time was there and left you a sign. Also the irradiated “Nuka-Cola” is actually Coors light. it acted as a sponge for the radiation.
Thank God for football!
by BattleRedHusker on Sep 6, 2011 1:14 AM CDT up reply actions
newb here...
Hey guys, first time commenting here, trying to get in before the regular season starts. Just wanted to say that this blog is my best source for all things texan, and I respect all the writers here. Hoping for the best this season with our boys in battle red.
by sebastian_8_8 on Sep 5, 2011 11:51 PM CDT via mobile reply actions 12 recs
welcome
Im looking for divine and a lttle intervention
And birds dont fly without my permission
Im prolly in the sky, flyin with the fishes
Or maybe in the ocean, swimmin with the pigeons
See my world is different, like Dwayne Wayne
And if you want problem Bit#h, i want the same thang
by F-BombTheJets on Sep 5, 2011 11:53 PM CDT up reply actions
Welcome, Sebastian
Look forward to reading more of your comments.
Looking forward to a day when being a Texans fan doesn't mean that April is the highlight of my season...
Greened
Welcome Sebastian
Mario Williams will have 4 sacks and 1 int by Game 4 of the regular season.
by Barryfromtexas on Sep 6, 2011 12:13 AM CDT up reply actions
Vikings fan here.
Been reading your blog the last several minutes, enjoying it and was reading about some of the issues. We’ve gone through all of this on the Norseman several times and it all eventually works out. Good luck with your season!
Thanks
You are banned from Stampede Blue.
You can browse the blog, but you can't participate.
Hi CFHTim. You're trolling yet another SB Nation blog. Since you've been banned from several other SB Nation blogs, you don't get a warning. You get banned. If you want to get unbanned, email BBS and state your case for re-admission.
Dear Tim,
Can Personal attacks on Michael Lombardi be OK please? Thanks!
Michael Lombardi Is a Douche
He’s such a dick to Heath Evans. It’s disgusting to watch.
Thank God for football!
Yes
A Texans fan. Really. No, I'm not kidding.
http://www.battleredblog.com
"Blind fandom is all I got left." - LoneSpot
Motherfuck Motherfuck, noise noise noise
Habitual lurker (who has more newbie greens than posts), but love the rules. Couldn’t help but think of Jay rapping when I saw the title of the post, simply because many blogs prohibit cursing altogether. Totally agree with the link to Rivers’ post; it is quite unfortunate that homophobic slurs have become so common as to where inanimate objects can now have a sexual preference. Cannot wait to get drunk Sunday and attempt to find the best internet stream to catch the game up here in northern NY
I've heard the rumors, but I'm quite sure it's possible to knock the Hustle
by Mookazoid on Sep 6, 2011 1:43 AM CDT reply actions 2 recs
Yes, we can't have that
Northern NY? Which part? I have spent nearly half my life up there.
I didn't do anything wrong!.... and, I won't do it again.
little tiny village called carthage
I guess you could call it a burb of watertown, if you’ve heard of watertown.. If not its like an hour northish of syracuse
I've heard the rumors, but I'm quite sure it's possible to knock the Hustle
by Mookazoid on Sep 6, 2011 10:58 AM CDT via mobile up reply actions
Yes, it wasn't one of my haunts
I did work one summer in Fine, and suburb or Governeur. Population of about 200. And, I lived for about 4 years near Syracuse.
I didn't do anything wrong!.... and, I won't do it again.
Now let's not start this all over again
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on Sep 6, 2011 11:23 AM CDT up reply actions
lulz... /gets popcorn
"Suck it, Jim Tressel, you filthy, cheating, unfashionable piece of monkey scrotum."
- MDC
"Let’s leave all the football talk to knowledgeable experts who have played the game, like Matt Millen and Emmitt Smith."
-tehGrindCrusher
Hey! We have to welcome the upstater, don't we?
Just don’t ask him if he drinks Genny Cream Ale, whatever you do!
I didn't do anything wrong!.... and, I won't do it again.
I am a FIRM believer in hospitality... carry on...
/crunch, crunch, crunch, crunch…
"Suck it, Jim Tressel, you filthy, cheating, unfashionable piece of monkey scrotum."
- MDC
"Let’s leave all the football talk to knowledgeable experts who have played the game, like Matt Millen and Emmitt Smith."
-tehGrindCrusher
Genny Cream Ale = ASPLODE!!!
'Without change something sleeps inside us, and seldom awakens. The sleeper must awaken.' -Frank Herbert
You need to get that right
Mario Williams will have 4 sacks and 1 int by Game 4 of the regular season.
by Barryfromtexas on Sep 6, 2011 8:28 PM CDT up reply actions
But the last incident started with you asking about where in NY he lived in
I’m just trying to stomp out that fire before gasoline falls on it
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on Sep 7, 2011 12:38 AM CDT up reply actions
Party pooper... rabble, rabble, rabble...
/crunch… crunch… crunch… crunch…
"Suck it, Jim Tressel, you filthy, cheating, unfashionable piece of monkey scrotum."
- MDC
"Let’s leave all the football talk to knowledgeable experts who have played the game, like Matt Millen and Emmitt Smith."
-tehGrindCrusher
New guy here...
Love this blog it came highly recommended by friends of mine. They said if you want to read real stuff about football, and not "mindless"sports journalism to come here. This is a great blog for Texan football fanatics. Probably the best. I look forward to talkin Football. Anything else I could care less about. Is it cool if I invite some guys and gals to chime in their thoughts, and opinions? We just wanna place to talk about football, and rant about how the Texans should and will dominate the Afc south. Thanks!
by Fastalkerus_Prime on Sep 6, 2011 3:05 AM CDT via mobile reply actions 4 recs
I don't presume to speak for the staff.
But the more the merrier.
GET A SILK BAG FROM THE GRAVEYARD DUCK TO LIVE LONGER.
Thanks!
I saw this post, and I thought that it was cool that they would do that. Nobody should come here to pick an internet fight. Totally lame.I mean we are all here to talk about football, and make corny jokes right? The only katz I’m gonna offend are the people hatin on Mario Williams.
by Fastalkerus_Prime on Sep 6, 2011 3:21 AM CDT via mobile up reply actions
Personally, I came for the bewbs.
Thanks, BFD!
I must rule with eye and claw — as the hawk among lesser birds.
-Duke Leto Atreides
by peytonsurdaddy on Sep 6, 2011 6:40 AM CDT up reply actions
Rec'd and welcome
Please bring your friends, especially if they’re female and hot knowledgeable about football.
A few things to get you guys started:
—Check the glossary if you want to know the lingo.
—Be ready to hear opposing views. If you think that we never should have let Dunta go, then you’re free to express your opinion. Just expect to have people disagree with you. As a writer for this site I appreciate the guys that swim upstream (ask Toolshed about his opinion on Matt Schaub, for example) more than they realize. It’s part of what makes this site great. On the flip side, don’t be afraid to take an unpopular stance.
—Enjoy. This is really an amazing thing – a group of people who get together to agonize over what has to be one of the least successful franchises in American sports, and a team with no real history or tradition to boot. The fact that there are so many sickos who follow this team so passionately still blows my mind. I thought I was one of the few until I stumbled upon this place.
—Be nice to the Colts exiles in the basement. They’re nice people and, after all, bums are part of the neighborhood too. But don’t ask how they got there, or why they’re wearing gimp masks.
—As with anything in life, don’t be a jerk.
Never use a metaphor, simile, or other figure of speech which you are used to seeing in print.
Never use a long word where a short one will do.
If it is possible to cut a word out, always cut it out.
Never use the passive where you can use the active.
Never use a foreign phrase, a scientific word, or a jargon word if you can think of an everyday English equivalent.
Break any of these rules sooner than say anything outright barbarous.
-Orwell, Politics and the English Language
www.battleredblog.com
by tehGrindCrusher on Sep 6, 2011 4:13 AM CDT up reply actions 3 recs
Cool man will do...
I work weird hours, so I might comment late. I just wanna talk football. fact I just wanna keep it classy, and see what other fans have to say.I am born and raised in Houston, I’ve been devastated, impressed,lied to, laughed at, and I once hugged a Derrik Doll. So hopefully I fit in here.
by Fastalkerus_Prime on Sep 6, 2011 5:10 AM CDT via mobile up reply actions
Shit man...
How many more words will be added to that after this season! I’m looking forward to this.
by Fastalkerus_Prime on Sep 6, 2011 5:57 AM CDT via mobile up reply actions
Welcome!
Re: glossary – Yeah, we’re a little broken.
A Texans fan. Really. No, I'm not kidding.
http://www.battleredblog.com
"Blind fandom is all I got left." - LoneSpot
That's one way to phrase it
You should work for a political campaign.
/no politics
If the Treasury Secretary doesn't have to pay taxes, then why do I?
Also don't ask about Arian Foster's fantasy value
That will be met by an overwhelming assault of nonstop sarcasm from which you may never recover from
Murphy’s 20th Military Law:
If it’s stupid, but it works, it ain’t stupid
by The Night Owl on Sep 6, 2011 11:27 AM CDT up reply actions
You are sick
Arian Foster is a person sir, he is not just some machine to pump out numbers for your fantasy team!
"Taco Joe - the beacon of optimism" TexansDC
"Great, you've doomed us all!" - UprootedTexan
God blessed Texas, but he has forsaken the Texans
Wrong... he is a pterodactyl... and he is "Teh Vreeek!"
"Suck it, Jim Tressel, you filthy, cheating, unfashionable piece of monkey scrotum."
- MDC
"Let’s leave all the football talk to knowledgeable experts who have played the game, like Matt Millen and Emmitt Smith."
-tehGrindCrusher
I love this place..
Go Texans!!!
GO TEXANS!!!!
Our time will come...
by Texanmaniac on Sep 6, 2011 4:57 AM CDT reply actions 1 recs
Just passing up from the basement
But I want to note my appreciation of the way BRB is run. I’m glad it hasn’t gone the way of some of the other SBN sites (and I mean that in the multiple).
Token southern hemisphere guy - 14,688km from Foxboro. That's 9128 miles, for you heathens.
Contributing Writer at PatsPulpit
lol did you stop by the cellar dwellers to join their incoherent drunken babblings? :)
that’s good, they need friends too.
Thank God for football!
by BattleRedHusker on Sep 6, 2011 11:01 PM CDT up reply actions
I've got plenty of friends!
Real ones!
I must rule with eye and claw — as the hawk among lesser birds.
-Duke Leto Atreides
by peytonsurdaddy on Sep 7, 2011 8:16 PM CDT up reply actions
Been lurking for quite some time
and I must admit…this site has become a daily staple for me. I have enjoyed the comments and analysis that come from mo$$tly everyone. I have ventured into other SBN rooms and haven’t seen the die hard fandom vibe that BRB brings. I love the articles and up to date texans news and speculations. My wife even ventures on here for me and updates me when I don’t have the time. It has taken me a while to get an account…timid I guess, but I’m glad I have one now. I’ve been a die-hard Texans fan for a long time but the military has kept me away from Houston for over 10 years. GO TEXANS!!! Can’t wait to go to my first Texans home game on 01 Jan.
by teh Bleach or not teh Bleach on Sep 6, 2011 5:45 AM CDT reply actions 6 recs
Better late than never
And welcome aboard!
Never use a metaphor, simile, or other figure of speech which you are used to seeing in print.
Never use a long word where a short one will do.
If it is possible to cut a word out, always cut it out.
Never use the passive where you can use the active.
Never use a foreign phrase, a scientific word, or a jargon word if you can think of an everyday English equivalent.
Break any of these rules sooner than say anything outright barbarous.
-Orwell, Politics and the English Language
www.battleredblog.com
by tehGrindCrusher on Sep 6, 2011 5:54 AM CDT up reply actions
Rec'd and grateful for your Service, Ohh Rah!
'Without change something sleeps inside us, and seldom awakens. The sleeper must awaken.' -Frank Herbert
Welcome!
A Texans fan. Really. No, I'm not kidding.
http://www.battleredblog.com
"Blind fandom is all I got left." - LoneSpot
Welcome, Bleach
Looking forward to a day when being a Texans fan doesn't mean that April is the highlight of my season...
by Tim on Sep 6, 2011 8:56 AM CDT up reply actions
You’re absolutely right about the die-hard fandom vibe that is pulsating from Battle Red Blog. There are very few NFL Blogs on SB Nation that can match the quality of writing number of knowledgeable commentors, and bustling activity that this place boasts. Makes me proud to be a Texans fan.
The bird is struggling out of the egg. The egg is the world. Whoever wants to be born, must first destroy a world.
by Stupendous Man on Sep 6, 2011 10:18 AM CDT via mobile up reply actions
I didn't know there were guidelines
Who follows those? I mean, who cares whether they are followed?
I didn't do anything wrong!.... and, I won't do it again.
I didn't finish reading this post.
But it’s the worst post ever.
- Rivers McCown, From Mom's Basement | Twitter | Football Outsiders | Battle Red Blog
by riversmccown on Sep 6, 2011 12:54 PM CDT up reply actions 4 recs
NUTT'D
"Taco Joe - the beacon of optimism" TexansDC
"Great, you've doomed us all!" - UprootedTexan
God blessed Texas, but he has forsaken the Texans
by Taco Joe on Sep 6, 2011 12:57 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^
DAMNIT UT!!!!!! SEEE?!?!?!? MAKE IT SOOOOOOOOO! (friendly glossary update reminder)
Thank God for football!
by BattleRedHusker on Sep 6, 2011 11:03 PM CDT up reply actions
I'm such a BRB fan, that I became the staff cook.
Only work 8 days a year, though. 10 if you count the pre-season. So please, be considerate of the NO PERSONAL ATTACKS rule. Unless it’s directed at Kerns’ role in Ben Tate’s PR department. That seems to be expected acceptable. #toughlove
Blind fandom is all I got left.
"Down to clown with some other chick's lady bits" ~ MDC
by Lone Spot on Sep 6, 2011 10:19 AM CDT reply actions 4 recs
You Get Paid In Recs
Which makes all that cooking worth it, right?
Looking forward to a day when being a Texans fan doesn't mean that April is the highlight of my season...
What more could I ask for?
Besides a t-shirt?
Blind fandom is all I got left.
"Down to clown with some other chick's lady bits" ~ MDC
you forgot Timobi...
"Taco Joe - the beacon of optimism" TexansDC
"Great, you've doomed us all!" - UprootedTexan
God blessed Texas, but he has forsaken the Texans
But Timobi got cut, remember?
"My idea of an agreeable person is a person who agrees with me." -- Benjamin Disraeli
"If you really want something in life you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers." -- Homer Simpson
"There is no rehab for stupid." -- Chris Rock
Never try to baptize a cat.
and Tim still hasn't quit crying in his Coors light
"If my hips had pockets, I wouldn't wear pants at all." @NotBurtReynolds
64 percent of all the world's statistics are made up right there on the spot
82.4 percent of people believe 'em whether they're accurate statistics or not
I don't know what you believe but I do know there's no doubt
I need another double shot of something 90 proof
I got too much to think about
so that's how you improve the "flavor" of coors light.
- Feeling the five stages of grief since 2002.
"It's either gonna make you a man or a coward. One of the two. I'm a be a man. I ain't never seen a coward, heard a coward, coward not in ma vocabulary." - Lawrence Vickers
by NoSafetiesNeeded on Sep 6, 2011 10:00 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
well see, the kick of the horse vomit is diluted from the tears.
also the salt adds a nice touch.
Thank God for football!
by BattleRedHusker on Sep 6, 2011 11:05 PM CDT up reply actions
amazing blog
so insightful, so informative, so funny. It makes my day.
no matter how bad they play, no matter how stupid they act, I still love my texans!
I'm the funny one.
And the attractive one.
I must rule with eye and claw — as the hawk among lesser birds.
-Duke Leto Atreides
by peytonsurdaddy on Sep 6, 2011 10:29 PM CDT up reply actions
I thought UT was going to fix that lock on the cellar door...?
"Suck it, Jim Tressel, you filthy, cheating, unfashionable piece of monkey scrotum."
- MDC
"Let’s leave all the football talk to knowledgeable experts who have played the game, like Matt Millen and Emmitt Smith."
-tehGrindCrusher
Don't Be Afraid of the Dark?
'Without change something sleeps inside us, and seldom awakens. The sleeper must awaken.' -Frank Herbert
It's not so much the things I can't see that worry me...
…as the things I can see come bounding through that door in search of beer and pork rinds.
"Suck it, Jim Tressel, you filthy, cheating, unfashionable piece of monkey scrotum."
- MDC
"Let’s leave all the football talk to knowledgeable experts who have played the game, like Matt Millen and Emmitt Smith."
-tehGrindCrusher
Metal Church FTW!
I must rule with eye and claw — as the hawk among lesser birds.
-Duke Leto Atreides
by peytonsurdaddy on Sep 7, 2011 8:17 PM CDT up reply actions
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