Hair Of The Dog: Also Not Worth $100M (Bills @ Texans)

Bob Levey

Hair of the Dog: The BRB writers have an email discussion during the Texans game against the Bills.

I spent Saturday in Miami to watch the Miami Flugtag as a few of my friends were competing in the event. They've spent the past month working feverishly to design and build a glider (they only found out about a month ago that they were in) and working on their skit.

Their theme was Batman, and they all dressed up as different versions of Batman (From Adam West to Christian Bale) while the pilot dressed up as the Joker. The glider was, obviously, designed as a bat plane.

They were the first of thirty teams to take flight yesterday, and "flew" 66 feet. That mark stood as the longest flight for about 25 teams when one team broke the 100 foot barrier. That team ended up winning the whole event, though it should be noted that their glider was two feet higher than allowed by the rules. It should also be noted that there are apparently no penalties for breaking the rules.

Team "Go Batty" ended up with the longest legal flight and finished third overall (distance is only 1/3 of the score with the other 2/3 being creativity and showmanship). They got a pretty cool looking trophy, which weighed about 30 lbs, and will get a VIP booth at the Ft. Lauderdale boat show.

Did we take the trophy out in Miami and use it to try to get free drinks? Of course. Did it work? No.

This really doesn't have anything to do with football (except that it resulted in me watching the game with a wicked hangover), but I wanted to take a moment to congratulate the team.

And now, here's the hair of the dog. In honor of my friends, for this week only, instead of replacing curse words with "kitten" we'll replace it with flugtag.

Pregame:

Brett:

I feel like this is a day that we all needed - a pure, unadulterated flugtag-stomping of the Buffalo Bills

TDC:

I think it shall happen. I'm not too concerned with the Bills, especially defensively.

UT:

I'm just a little superstitious about calling it a flugtagstomping before the game even starts.

First Quarter:

Rivers:

Check it out, a Texans special team penalty. Marciano coached them up.

TDC:

Back-to-back special teams penalties. WOOOOOOOO

Rivers:

Shaun Cody celebrating anything is like a touchdown celebration when the score just brought you within 28 points.

TDC:

Brice McCain on Stevie Johnson isn't what I want to see.

Brett:

That would have been a great pass...if Stevie Johnson was a three story building.

Rivers:

Starting to think the Texans didn't even practice special teams after the bye week.

Rivers:

My only question is what quarter the Buffalo ST touchdown comes in. I'm guessing third

Brett (after Arian Foster runs for a first down on third and long):

Oh my god, have they not watched film? They should have seen a third down run coming.

TDC:

Didn't like the play call on 3rd and 2. You're playing a terrible run defense...line up and go.

Rivers (after the touchdown to Owen Daniels):

The Bills are pretty bad at the whole "defending play-action" thing.

BFD:

Schaub is decent at selling play action fakes. On the TD to OD, it was simply criminal.

Rivers:

When Dave Wannstedt played Tecmo Bowl he just picked the first defensive option every time.

TDC:

This year, looks like Schaub is doing a much better job of leading receivers or hitting them in stride. I don't see them slowing up as much.

Second Quarter

UT:

Stevie Johnson is hobbling like my cat after a seizure.

TDC:

Oh so it's going to be like that is it? Andre, hold my weave.

Brett (after Mario's sack):

Good technique there, Derek.

Rivers:

This is bad football. I blame whoever said we were flugtag-stomping the Bills.

Half Time:

BFD:

Defense hasn't made a big play, and we've struggled. JJ and the rest have spoiled the offense.

Third Quarter:

MDC:

Bills going empty backfield and we keep putting Dobbins on a wr. Scary flugtag.

BFD:

Am I the only one who bows at home along with Foster?

Namaste, bitches.

Brett:

I don't namaste, but I do drink wheat grass shakes and take a lap in my segway.

UT:

I don't know about y'all, but few things would scare me as much as Brian Cushing waving his crutch at me and scowling

Rivers:

I actually fell asleep for the last seven minutes of the third quarter.

Fourth Quarter

Brett:

Arian has had the shit beat out of him today and still got 100 yards.

Brett:

Chris Johnson, 4 fumbles. Love it.

UT:

Going for it on 4th and 6 at the 30?

We've secretly replaced Gary Kubiak with former Saints coach Sean Payton. Let's see if anybody notices!

It's a fairly short Hair of the Dog this week, and I think that's due mainly to the fact that this was not the type of game to spur lively discussion. It was kind of ugly, but with some beautiful moments. I guess you could say it was the football equivalent of the girl with a great personality.

That was far from the best game the Texans have played this season, but once again, the team walks away with a fairly comfortable win. It really highlighted the talent gap between the Bills and Texans and showed that the team is not reliant on any single player, as all the key players had their moments.

And for what it's worth, regardless of the comments made this week (and despite the title), I will continue to root for Mario Williams and hope that he plays well for the Bills -- especially now that this game is over.

Game Balls:

Offense: Andre Johnson. He didn't score, but he just abused the Bills secondary and played like old Andre.

Defense: J.J. Watt. He hasn't won this in a few weeks, and it just feels weird.

Special Teams: Keshawn Martin. He looked really good in his returns and actually made the return game look not pathetic.

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