DC's grasp of teh off.
by txnpwrlifter on Sep 13, 2007 7:43 AM CDT
10 comments
The chronic believes that Sandy's grasp of the Texans off. will benefit the Panthers in some way on Sunday. I disagree, and here's why.
I think his report of how the Texanns off. throws to the hot reciever, the outlet back or the sideline judge 90% of the time will not be particularly helpful to Mr. Peppers et al. His GRASP was minimal last year when they were screaming instructions at him. I do not see how it would have improved miraculously with another off season of braiding his pubes with his boyfriend.
0 recs |
10 comments
Email
Print
Comments
I agree
http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/sports/5130886.html
The first line is the best: "The Carolina Panthers might as well have the Texans' entire playbook, because David Carr, Carolina's new backup quarterback, knows every nuance of his old team's offense."
I'm pretty sure the concensus is that David's lack of understanding of our playbook was one of the main reason we sucked last year. Plus, his playbook was probably like 1/10th the size of what they use with Schaub. I'd venture to say it's more risky for Carolina to use his info than to know nothing at all.
More power to you, Carolina, if you think you can get the inside scoop on the Texans from Zoolander.
by bv on Sep 13, 2007 7:53 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
wow
Jake: "Are you sure it's a two-step drop and then, you know, drop?"
DC: "Definitely. The press will blame it on the o-line, anyway, and you'll still look tough."
Jake: "But you know we have Steve Smith, right?"
DC: "And I had Andre, but the press will still blame the offensive line. It's win/win! [mumbles under his breath: "except for putting points on the board and winning games"]"
Jake: "What?"
DC: "Oh nothing, nothing."
by bigfatdrunk on Sep 13, 2007 8:24 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Damn You Guys!
John Fox: David, any insight you can give us into the Houston offense? You know, having run it last year and all?
Zoolander: Oh, yeah, Coach. I know it like the back of my hand.
Fox: Great. Stay close to me on Sunday.
FAST FORWARD TO SUNDAY'S TILT. Houston has the ball on 3rd and 5 at the Carolina 48.
Fox (running toward his second-string QB): David! David!
Zoolander (puts down the mousse): Yeah, Coach?
Fox: It's 3rd and 5! What are the Texans going to run?
Zoolander: Oh, I got this, Coach. That other #8 is going to snap the ball...
Fox: Of course. What next?
Zoolander: Well, then he has three options. That's the great part about Coach Dom's offense--there's always options.
Fox: Sure, sure. So what are his options?
Zoolander: Well, the first option is the safety valve.
Fox: Huh?
Zoolander: You know, Coach. The safety valve. It'll probably be the running back. I think his name is Domanick.
Fox (speechless):...
Zoolander: Here's where it gets tricky, so pay attention, Foxy. If the safety valve has anyone within five (5) yards of him, the QB has to check down.
Fox: Check down? To what? You already said the first option was the safety valve!
Zoolander: Do I have to dumb this down for you, Foxy? Jeez. Check down to the run, of course.
Fox: Zuh?
Zoolander: Yup--it's brilliant, because no one ever expects it. The QB runs diagonally, toward his own endzone, for at least five (5) yards, and runs out of bounds. Now, you've got it into 4th and manageable.
Fox (speechless):...
Zoolander: But it's not over. A defender may have already gotten some penetration into the...wait, who am I kidding? This is the Texans offensive line! Of course the D will have gotten back there! You know, that's why I'm not still in Houston, Foxy. The Texans never protected me.
Fox (speechless):...
Zoolander: Anyhooo...if there's a defender within five yards of that SOB #8, he'll go to his third option--the fetal position.
Fox: WHAT THE...!
Zoolander: Yup. He'll curl up and fall down. I used to imagine that I was back in my daddy's womb, where it was always so safe and warm and...
THE SCHAUB SNAPS THE BALL AND COMPLETES A TD PASS TO JACOBY JONES.
Fox: You're fired, David.
Zoolander: That's cool, Coach. I never really liked football anyway. Can I keep the mousse though?
by Tim on Sep 13, 2007 9:55 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
"back in my daddy's womb"
"[Matt Leinart] looks less adept at throwing on the run than Stephen Hawking would be."
by Shake on Sep 13, 2007 10:14 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Daddy's Womb
I remember daddy's womb, holding me with care
And reaching out to hold me, when I messed up my hair
He protected me from harm, in his womb so dark and safe
And I practiced throwing sidearm, in that tight little space
I remember daddy's womb and how my mama envied so
She knew it took a real man, to help a QB grow
I swear my o-line was why I kept falling down too soon
But I'll always have protection deep in daddy's womb
CHORUS
Daddy's womb was soft and kind when I was cryin'
Daddy's womb was my escape when coach done wrong
Daddy's womb was at every practice, until the Texans made him leave
So daddy's womb came to Carolina with me
by MDC on Sep 13, 2007 11:02 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Jebus
by Tim on Sep 13, 2007 12:57 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Hey
I realize that Chron can't publish the truth without humiliating Carr, but why would they write this crap? If Manfull and McClain really believe he could seriously assist Carolina with a scouting of the Texans, I just lost a lot of respect for them.
by bv on Sep 13, 2007 10:20 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Guessing / Hoping
Maybe it was an assignment handed down by the bossman, and she was forced to write it. Damn the Man.
by Shake on Sep 13, 2007 10:42 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Save the Empire!
by txnpwrlifter on Sep 13, 2007 11:24 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
"Daddy's womb."
by MDC on Sep 13, 2007 10:49 AM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Comments For This Post Are Closed
Secondary Sidebar
FanPosts
Community blog posts and discussion.
Certain photos copyright © 2009 by Associated Press or Getty Images. Any commercial use or distribution without the express written consent of Associated Press and Getty Images is strictly prohibited.
