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The Perfect Side Dish For Some Guaranteed Cash

That cha-ching, and the giggling that immediately followed it, you just heard was Apostrophe Davis' agent responding to today's news that his client has been named the AFC Special Teams Player of the Month for December.  Not coincidentally, the soft weeping that you just heard was Jerome Mathis realizing that he's become as useful as tits on a bull.

Congratulations, Other Andre.  You deserve the rarefied air that accompanies joining the extremely exclusive Vitamin Smith Club.  Now please, please, please re-up with the Texans.

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I hope he re-ups
as long as it's reasonable. If (and it's a big if) JJ finds his inner bad mamma jamma, Apostrophe will be doing backup and return duties.

by ArtistFormerlyKnownAsBuck on Jan 3, 2008 5:44 PM CST   0 recs

Agreed
I'm thinking somewhere in the neighborhood of $1.0-$1.25 mil in guaranteed dollars, accompanied by the immediate release of Jerome Mathis.

Jacoby's loss of mojo from the end of preseason to now scares the bejeesus out of me.  What the hell happened?  Was it just the injury?  Rookie struggles?  Phillip Buchanon spiked his water?

Looking forward to a day when being a Texans fan doesn't mean that April is the highlight of my season...

by Tim on Jan 3, 2008 6:12 PM CST to parent up   0 recs

Clearly
getting his shoulder separated by a punter was the major turning point of JJ's mojo.

Dude freaking needs to recover psychologically. Man up, JJ!!

by knave64 on Jan 3, 2008 7:56 PM CST to parent up   0 recs

Rookie jitters
I really think he became overwhelmed with the NFL in general.  He came from Lane college.  The Senior Bowl was his first time in front of that big a crowd.  I'm not worried about JJ.  We saw what he can do in the preseason and now he has a full season under his belt.  He'll be fine - we knew he was going to be a project.
Tell me again why I follow sports?

by DisplacedTexan on Jan 3, 2008 8:54 PM CST to parent up   0 recs

Alan Thicke knows all about it
At times, when Jacoby attempts to make a cut, he gets very loose and I mean his entire body (See second play, screen pass during the 1st Titans game).  He looks like a pro sports version of an awkward teen getting used to his changing body - either that or a baby giraffe.

He also needs to learn when to get down.  Too many times I've seen him dance in one spot only to provide a perfect target for the defense to tee off on.

Let's hope in year two, he takes in enough of the coaching and gameday experience to have a breakout year.

Shakin 'em off one win at a time... In Schaub we trust.

by SOLIS on Jan 4, 2008 10:53 AM CST to parent up   0 recs

Respect
Surely 'Dre has some respect for the team that allowed him more than 4 catches in a season, as well as the ability to earn kickoff/punt return duties.

So long as Big Bob shows 'Dre some respect with the offer, I think we will continue with Dre-squared in '08.

On the subject of JJ, don't worry.  He still has the main goal of capturing BFD's heart.  And he still has the raw talent to achieve that goal.

We can be critical of the draft picks, but in the end we always support the new Texan.

by Shake on Jan 4, 2008 7:05 AM CST   0 recs

agreed
My man-crush on JJ is surpassed by only TPL's, wherever the latter may be.

by bigfatdrunk on Jan 4, 2008 10:37 AM CST to parent up   0 recs

Let's hope...
that he is a more prolific TD scorer in future seasons than V.Smith was.

by MDC on Jan 4, 2008 2:10 PM CST   0 recs

Just because...
Didn't want to waste a diary, but I'm gonna hijack the hell out of this thread.

I am announcing that I am in love, and I may even leave JJ.  Courtesy of the always awesome deadspin:
http://deadspin.com/341040/jenny-hendrix-loves-jags-anal

I loved you all...until today.

by bigfatdrunk on Jan 5, 2008 7:04 PM CST   0 recs

The cool thing is...
you already got that picture with her.

by MDC on Jan 5, 2008 7:25 PM CST to parent up   0 recs

If I wasn't so physically nauseating...
...I would photoshop myself onto a still buggering her.  Alas...

That poor girl would never know what hit her.  Because it would be over so quickly, of course.

by bigfatdrunk on Jan 5, 2008 7:40 PM CST to parent up   0 recs

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