Stuff To Get Us Through The Offseason

The J.J. Watt Comic You've Been Waiting For!

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They got his powers all wrong, though. No extendable bionic left arm? No burritos eaten? No frickin' laser beams? Stay tuned for movie rumors.

Meanwhile, In Chad Johnson News...

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Chad Johnson, (formerly Chad Ochocinco and formerly an NFL-caliber wide receiver) scored his first touchdown since 2011. He's playing for the Montreal Alouettes up in the CFL.

The throw came from Troy Smith (also formerly of the NFL) for a 46-yard score.

Don't know why I'm sharing this, but there you have it. Perhaps there's some hidden correlation to the ongoing Andre Johnson saga that I can't quite decipher.

Found this on The Twitter.

Introducing Your Houston... Er... Roxans?

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Brandon Hubschman created hybrid logos for NFL and NBA teams. The new Texans/Rockets logo has me hungry for a hot dog.

Happy Independence Day From Battle Red Blog

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It's July 4th. Celebrate the independence of the United States of America from British rule by commenting on a blog devoted to the Houston Texans. It's as American as George Washington riding a...

Who Do You Think You Are, Jaguars?

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Our friends over in Jacksonville are getting all uppity about the improvements made to their stadium.

Houston Texans Cheerleader Swimsuit Calendar Info

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There'll be a live event with the Houston Texans Cheerleaders revealing their latest calendar. Get the info here.

Houston Texans Madden 2015 Player Ratings

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The ratings are in. What ratings have EA Sports concocted for the Texans' rookies?

Stephen Colbert Rips Jaguars To Shreds

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Stephen Colbert does not mind kicking a football team when it's down... and as fans of another team in the AFC South, we thank him for it.

Battle Red Blog Glossary (Third Edition)

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You asked for it. Now here it is, with all the new terms and definitions you helped coin at Battle Red Blog over the last couple of years.

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Game of Throws - "Chaos Is A Ladder"

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A loosely constructed premise for a post as we try to latch on to the soaring popularity of a certain TV show on HBO.

2014 NFL Draft: Nickname The Texans DEs

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Let's have some Friday fun and give a name to the best duo since peanut butter and jelly.

Watt And Reed Trained In Wisconsin

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They say it's "who you know" that matters most. Right now I think Brooks Reed considers himself lucky to know J.J. Watt who took Reed with him to train in Wisconsin.

Andre: "The Best Is Yet To Come" For Posey

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Interviewed at an event for his charity, Andre Johnson, the Texans' All-Galaxy wide receiver, had some hopeful words for DeVier Posey.

Video: J.J. Watt Dominating A Half Ton Tire

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From J.J. Watt's Instagram.

J.J. Watt has the mental and physical strength to lift and shove a 1000 pound rubber tire while Sara Bareilles shrieks in the background. Well done, Watt.

Battle Red Radio: The Meat Market

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The 2014 NFL Scouting Combine is over and done with. Stay awhile and listen to Matt Weston and Battle Red Blog's own draft expert Brett Kollmann break it down at 7 p.m CST.

2013 Texans Season Review: Reader's Choice Results

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The tribe has spoken and here are the results for the Battle Red Blog 2013 Reader's Choice Awards.

2013 Texans Season Review: Reader's Choice Awards

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I turned in my ballot yesterday. Now it's your turn to make your selections for the 2013 season awards.

2013 Season Review: Houston Texans Season Awards

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The Super Bowl is over and we can now sit back and look at the 2013 Houston Texans season before moving onto 2014. Matt Weston continues his season review with the second annual imaginary rewards...

Celebrate V-Day With Pics Of Player Wives and GFs

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Happy Valentine's Day! In the spirit of this most sacred holiday, known pervert David Corzo trolls the Internet looking for pictures of the Houston Texans' wives and girlfriends.

Gary Kubiak To Become Ravens Offensive Coordinator

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The remaining bones of the old Texans' regime have been picked clean with the Ravens' hiring of Gary Kubiak as offensive coordinator. Add your thoughts here.

S.N.O.T.: 08/24/13

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With no Texans game tonight, the Saturday Night Open Thread returns to Battle Red Blog. Come and chat, won't you?

S.N.O.T.: 08/10/13

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It's the weekly Saturday Night Open Thread on Battle Red Blog. Talk about whatever's on your mind...Houston Texans or otherwise.

Texans 2013 Preseason: Watching Sideline Behavior

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Battle Red Blog will have a presence at the opening game for the Houston Texans' 2013 preseason. What will the lucky writer be watching for under the Friday night lights?

Texans Training Camp: Notable Quotes From Day 12

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Gary Kubiak and Brian Cushing spoke after today's Texans training camp practice. See what they had to say about (and who'll be playing) in Friday night's preseason opener against the Vikings.

Battle Red Newswire: Let The Preseason Begin

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Wednesday is the last a.m. practice before the first preseason game this Friday. We're down a Reed, a running back (or two), and a rookie linebacker who failed in his one job of being in shape as a...

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