baseless predictions Stories - Battle Red Blog
PUT YOUR NAME ON IT: Houston Texans Will Go 9-7
When I predicted your Houston Texans would go 9-7 this season, I was greeted with a combination of disbelief, hate, anger, fury, rage, confusion, doubt, and inquiries into my manhood. All legitimate, I might add. I did myself no favors with my behavior in the late 90s. I WAS TRYING TO FIND...
Three And Out: Useless Predictions For Sunday's Game
Rather odd week here in UselessPredictionsLand. On the one hand, many things seem virtual locks. On the other hand, I can't remember being this unsure of how a game would turn out in quite some time. So many potentially dispositive forces at play--the Texans' secondary being what it is, the...
Three And Out: Useless Predictions For Tonight's Game
The last time your Houston Texans tangled with the Indianapolis Colts, the Texans looked like world-beaters. It was the best and most complete effort of their 2010 season to date. Since that time, Houston fans have been on a roller coaster that hasn't featured the Texans resembling anything close...
Three And Out: Useless Predictions For Sunday's Game
Your Houston Texans are 1-0. "Three And Out" is...I don't know. I was sort of in the ballpark about a few things, and clearly off on others. With that kind of patent demonstration of clairvoyance, how can you miss this week's edition? Bet the mortgage note on these predictions, folks! And then...
Three And Out: Useless Predictions For Sunday's Game
I'm in a bit of a fantasy football fix this week. My opponent is starting the defense of your Houston Texans. Needless to say, I want the Texans defense to do well. Just not too well. Every sack or interception by Houston will result in me cheering, then realizing a split second later that the...
Three And Out: Useless Predictions For Sunday's Game
I'm going to get this post up as quickly as I can, lest another Texan be ruled out for Sunday's tilt against the Jaguars and render my rock-solid (read: baby soft) predictions moot. To wit: 1. Your Houston Texans couldn't manage a single sack in their first meeting with the Jags. This time,...
Three And Out: Useless Predictions For Sunday's Game
Hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving. While the wounds from Monday night's disaster are still fresh, we don't have the luxury of sulking; the undefeated Colts come to town tomorrow afternoon, and your Houston Texans have to win to maintain a realistic shot of staying in the hunt for a wild card...
Three And Out: Useless Predictions For Monday Night Football
Only a few more hours until your Houston Texans take on Bud Adams' Army of Darkness at Reliant Stadium. And only a few more hours until the following things come to pass (Ed. note: Author does not personally guarantee the following things will actually come to pass): 1. Mario Williams continues...
Three And Out: Useless Predictions For Sunday's Game
Last week, yours truly correctly predicted that (1) Jacques Reeves would have an interception and (2) Matt Schaub's streak of turnover-less football would end. Pretty good, right? Kindly ignore the misplaced faith in Steve Slaton's hands, Owen Daniels' health, Schaub's ability to limit his...
Three And Out: Useless Predictions For Sunday's Game
Last week's "Three And Out" was fatally flawed. And not for the usual those-are-awful-predictions-that-didn't-come-to-pass rationale. No, last week, despite my well-established psychic abilities, I never saw Alex Smith coming. For that, I apologize. I failed you, and I failed myself. If the...
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