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Injury Report--Houston v. Minnesota

Forgive my lack of verve this morning. I'm still trying to shake off last night's unpleasantness, right down to the fact that Michael Crabtree is a spitting image of Andre Johnson. I've decided that the only way to restore balance to my universe is for 'Dre to catch a game-winning TD today in Minnesota. Back on topic...here's this week's injury report. As you know, the players are accurate, though the ailments may not be.

HOUSTON
A. Davis--out (finger)
Z. Diles--questionable (hamstring)
A. Green--questionable, though he has 200,000 reasons to suit up today (thigh)
D. Barber--probable (hamstring)
K. Walter--probable (knee)

MINNESOTA
D. Herron--out (kolpophobia)
G. Mills--questionable (sphincter bleaching gone awry)
R. Edwards--probable (peladophobia)
S. Rice--probable (dry nipple)
M. Williams--probable (pupaphobia)