Building from the original post, I'll update the awesomenessestestism of our defense on a weekly basis as we fight to become the worst defense in the history of the NFL^. Now, take two steps left and join me after the jump. *click* Oh, right, the painters moved my desk.
Ladies, gentlemen, and Jordann, it just doesn't get any better than this. Your Houston Texans are #1! In crappy defenses. Here's an updated list, sorted by FootballOutsiders' DVOA, of the worst defenses in their database (negative numbers are better):
| Team | Year | DVOA |
| JUGGERNAUT | 2010 | 31.0% |
| DET | 2008 | 29.2% |
| DEN | 2008 | 24.7% |
| MIN | 2000 | 24.4% |
| BUF | 2010 | 23.8% |
Those cheating cheaters in Buffalo were able to squelch the mighty Shaun Hill, and they dropped several spots down the list. We are giving the only 0-16 team in football history a run for their money for the worst defense EVAR. Yet, we aren't that dominantly sucky. Hmmmm, how can we fix that? Oh, right.
| Team | Year | Pass DVOA |
| JUGGERNAUT | 2010 | 54.3% |
| DEN | 2010 | 42.1% |
| DET | 2009 | 40.1% |
| JAC | 2009 | 39.8% |
| BAL | 1996 | 38.8% |
Now that's dominance! Opposing QBs are now lighting us up for a 229-334 (68.7% completion rate), 2,824 yards, 22 TDs, 5 INTs line, good for a 107.7 QB rating. The best comp is still Kurt Warner's 1999 MVP season, except with fewer INTs.
With only seven games to go, the Texans defense is well on its way to being the worst defense in NFL history. Lest you believe I might hurt Frank Bush's feelings? Why, he scoffs at that suggestion.
I now present to you Slobberbone's tribute to the 2010 Texans defense, Meltdown:
^ The DVOA database only goes back to 1993. However, unless there is an outlier during the AFL years, it's highly likely this is the worst defense in NFL history. Plus, it's a lot easier to say than repeatedly qualifying it with "since 1993." Plus plus, the Texans defense deserves to be called the worst in NFL history.