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An Ode To The Texans' Playoff Scenarios

Twas the week of Thanksgiving and all through the league,

Teams were struggling with injuries and fighting fatigue.


The Texans return and place their bull's eye,

On the Jacksonville Jaguars -- a second straight bye.


But fans can look forward and count all the reasons,

To finally believe at this point in the season.


With six games to go, our great team's sitting pretty,

For bringing the playoffs to the Bayou City.


The odds were improved with the Titans' last dump,

Let's look at scenarios after the jump.

The focus right now is to win the division,

And this should be done as it's hard to envision,


The Texans regressing and losing their stance,

As only the Titans at all stand a chance.


And they've struggled badly, despite all their claims,

With losses in four of their previous six games.


Hasselbeck's injury won't help them much.

Nor Chris Johnson getting just three yards a touch.


So even with Leinart now turning the screws,

The AFC South is the Texans' to lose.


In terms of the conference the Texans rank two;

Which certainly calls for a toast of homebrew.


Three have a record of 7-3,

Though the Pats will soon join on must-not-see-TV.


New England by far has the easiest way,

With not even one winning team left to play.


If one thing can stop them on their final push,

Its a pass D that feels like it's run by Frank Bush.


Should the Texans and Pats end the year in a tie,

The divisional games could define the first bye.


If Houston can win their divisional spats,

Then they'd own the tiebreaker over the Pats.


The other threat comes from the Steelers and Ravens,

Whose schedules are hardly the work of Wes Craven's.


The schedules remaining are nearly the same,

The Bengals and Niners and Browns left to tame.


Our preference should be that the Ravens and Co.,

Continue to start and employ Joe Flacco.


He's likely to have at least one more big gag,

Just like Week 7 when facing the Jags.


If the Ravens can slip and the Steelers prevail,

Then fans of the Texans should lift up their ales.


Because in the end if the two teams are tied,

The Texans win out thanks to Foster's wild ride.


I haven't forgotten the AFC west,

Or Buffalo Bills or the "great" New York Jets.


The truth is that those teams are not worth a rhyme,

They win only fifty percent of the time.


So that's where we stand with just six weeks to go,

The Texans look good, that you already know.


And lest you think these dreams are only delusion,

The playoffs are nearly a foregone conclusion.


We still need to see how Matt Leinart can throw,

And if he'll refer to his coaches as "bro".


We're hopefully done with the injury bug,

Or the rest of my homebrew I'll be forced to chug.


But should things unfold in the way we expect,

The folks down in Houston will get to erect.


A banner proclaiming the first playoff game,

The city has seen since the Oilers went lame.


I hope that you found this short poem effective,

You don't have to become a playoff detective.


But if it somehow failed to fill you with glee,

Try reading while sitting on BFD's knee.