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This Week in the Red Zone, or When Rationalization Will Rule the Day!

Here stands the most considerate man in the world.
Here stands the most considerate man in the world.

Like many of you, I do not want to rehash whatever the hell that was we saw on Thursday night. I'd just as soon not think about the incompetent referees, the zombie-like offense, or the utter lunacy of allowing Kareem Jackson onto the field at ANY point during which there is time still on the clock. (Aside: I found great comfort by singing the classic Tex-mas song "We Wish You'd Cut Kareem Jackson (and We Mean By Next Week)" during the drive to my wife's family's house. My wife, however, did not find this nearly as comforting)

Instead, I'm going to my happy place. A place where losing to Dan Orlovsky and the Colts can be molded and shaped and framed into a lovely centerpiece of denial and delusion.


It WAS the game before Christmas, and the Colts have had such a horrific year prior to the game. And Gary Kubiak seems like a decent enough guy. I'm willing to bet you that, because we're already going to the playoffs and out of an deep sense of sympathy for the Colts' plight, Kubiak didn't exactly give a supreme effort on the gridiron Thursday and instead decided to give the Colts the gift that keeps on giving--a win and a muddied chance to get the first overall pick in next year's draft.

Yeah, yeah, that's it. He wanted to give them an early Christmas present! And the Texans, such men of high character, they went along with Kooky Kubiak's nutty scheme and played they way they did. They did because they HAD to in order to assure a Colts win.

Well played, Coach Kubiak, well played indeed.

See? Rationalization can make even the worst thing sound nice!

Oh, well. At least we get Wade and Andre back to face Southern Kentucky.

Also, since none of us want to relive the Thursday night debacle, this will be a very short and decidedly unsweet red zone review.

Red Zone Statistics

Trips to the Red Zone: 3
Total Time Spent in Red Zone: 2:04
Average Time Spent in Red Zone: :41
Red Zone Efficiency: 3/3 (100%)
Scores in Red Zone: 1 TD (Foster) 2 FG (35, 31)

Next week, the Texans close out their regular season with the return of Andre Johnson and Wade Phillips in a home game against "Glass" Matt Glasselbeck and the Southern Kentucky BE-SFs; with Andre...and Innegan.

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