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Three And Out: Useless Predictions For Texans-Lions

It's Texans on Thanksgiving, which means it's time for a tryptophan-laced edition of the worst prediction column around. Settle in and prepare to be underwhelmed.

I love this picture so much.
I love this picture so much.
Thomas B. Shea

First and foremost, please allow all of us here at BRB to wish you and yours a very happy Thanksgiving. I hope tomorrow finds you well fed, content, and with a mug that never runs dry of ale (or wine, or whiskey, or Shirley Temples, or whatever it is you like to drink). Will you also be giving thanks for a Texans victory? There's only one way to find out. Watch the game Read these predictions.

1. Johnathan Joseph does not play. Calvin Johnson exceeds 110 yards receiving and contributes two TDs. I fully expect Wade Phillips to roll safety help toward Megatron on nearly every play (as he would have done even if J-Jo was playing, I'd guess), but I think Matthew Stafford is going to put the ball where only Calvin can get it a time or four.

2. Offensively, the Texans continue to hum. Matt Schaub throws for 250 yards, including a touchdown pass of more than 15 yards on Houston's first offensive drive of the game. The recipient of that TD pass? Andre Johnson, of course. Speaking of 'Dre, it will be a treat to watch him and Calvin Johnson square off in a game of can-you-top-this. While Calvin will best Andre in the TD category, 'Dre will have more receiving yards and catches. Other Texans who find the end zone tomorrow afternoon: Arian Foster and Owen Daniels.

3. Dominic Raiola has instructed J.J. Watt to "bring it." That seems like an insanely foolish thing to say. Raiola will get his wish, as J.J. manages a deflection and a sack. Connor Barwin, returning to his hometown, adds a sack of his own. Unfortunately, however, the Texans continue to struggle getting consistent pressure from the edge, and Stafford frequently finds himself with sufficient time to throw. He takes advantage of it with the aforementioned pair of TDs to Calvin Johnson, plus a third TD to Brandon Pettigrew.

PUT YOUR NAME ON IT: I do not have a good feeling about this game. Coming off what was essentially a five quarter game and having to travel to Detroit on a very short week is not a recipe for success. Throw in the likelihood of a missing or hobbled J-Jo and Calvin Johnson being Calvin Johnson, and looks bleak. I expect the Texans to gamely fight in a back-and-forth affair, with the game coming down to a field goal. Jason Hanson will drill it to give the home team the win. Texans 21, Lions 24.

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