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Three And Out: Useless Predictions For Texans-Redskins

If you're looking for a prediction post about what'll happen in the Texans' 2014 opener against Washington, I suppose this qualifies. As long as you're not one of those people who insist on predictions being right, useful, or of any real benefit besides entertainment.

"Why's it called Three and Out when you make four predictions?"
"Why's it called Three and Out when you make four predictions?"
Bob Levey

For as long as man has walked the earth, he has asked, "What is Three and Out?". Fortunately for me, I have access to the BRB archives so I can simply copy and paste what I wrote about this weekly feature in years past.

Each week, I'll make three (3) predictions concerning statistics, plays, performance, and the like that are guaranteed to occur in Sunday's Monday night's Texans game. How often are said predictions accurate? Virtually never. Remember--I'm a moron. Nevertheless, I have a microphone and you don't, so you will read every damn prediction I make!

Does this mean you should bet your hard-earned money that the following will come true on Sunday? No Yes. Yes, it does. In the words of Charles and/or Eddie, would I lie to you?

Thus, I give you these three (3) predictions, plus a final score, concerning Sunday's season opener between your Houston Texans and the Washington Redskins.

1. That J.J. Watt-Jadeveon Clowney monstrosity that you've been yearning to see since May and quite possibly dreaming of before then? It arrives in earnest on Sunday at NRG Stadium. While Trent Williams is one of the better left tackles in the league, I expect Romeo Crennel to move Watt and/or Clowney around to attack the more vulnerable parts of Washington's offensive line. J.J. Watt and Jadeveon Clowney combine for three sacks and five tackles for loss on Sunday.

2. The Texans will need every ounce of that pass rush, because DeSean Jackson is going to beat Houston deep twice, one of which will be for a TD of 35+ yards when a safety fails to help. One of the stories coming out of the regular season opener, albeit a minor one that will gain steam as the season rolls on, will be whether the Texans overestimated the soundness of their secondary, particularly on the back end.

3. Offensively, I expect Arian Foster to turn in a performance that brings to mind his 2010 excellence, in no small part because I believe we'll see him featured more as a receiver than we have in a few years. Foster finishes with a total of 125 yards from scrimmage and a TD.

PUT YOUR NAME ON IT: As fate would have it, the two worst teams in the entire NFL last season square off to start the season in 2014. I don't expect much out of either team in terms of playoff contention this year. Although I remain skeptical of Ryan Fitzpatrick's ability to move the ball down the field without turning it over, I think the Texans' pass rush, coupled with the home field advantage, gives them a slight edge over Washington. Bill O'Brien gets his first win as a head coach in the NFL. Texans 20, Redskins 17.

Redskins vs Texans coverage
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