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At some point on I-95, I realized that it had been two weeks since I found myself in the backwater hellhole that is Florida. The drugs had worn off, and Dr. Hoyero didn't have anything to give me a fix. I was going out of my mind.
I needed a hit. That's when we hit Miami -- glorious, neon cocaine-filled Miami. It was time to party. At the very least, we can burn the town down like Tony Montana and get the hell back to Texas.
At that point, the dolphin people showed up. I was going out of my mind. They tried to run and pass as I watched on in amazement and mystification. J.J. Watt wrestled them out of the room and I passed out.
(It's been a minute since I read Fear and Loathing, so this is my terrible attempt to replicate that.)
Now the infographic:Texans vs Dolphins coverage