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Andre Johnson's departure was like losing a family member; his signing with the Colts was like having the deceased family member return as a zombie that you now have to fight with a chainsaw. And that chainsaw is wielded by D.J. Swearinger, because of course it is.
The Texans won (?) the Brian Hoyer Sweepstakes yesterday. So...yay?
There's still that Vince Wilfork rumor floating around. Maybe it is resolved today? I'm going to pretend like it doesn't scream "ED REED, BUT FAT!" (Spoiler: It does.)
Consider this post your place to discuss these signings, free agency generally, and rumors that you are hearing about your Houston Texans. This is your seventh open thread for NFL free agency in 2015.