Scene: A table is surrounded by the brass of the Houston Texans.
Front office member No. 1: We need a way to test the limits of fandom. How far can we take our fans before they break?
Front office member No. 2: I think I have just the guy to help us out with this.
Enter Rick Smith in full Joker face paint.
Smith: Evening, gentlemen. What we need is to shake up the establishment. We don't draft a quarterback. Instead, we acquire and cultivate other teams’ backups. Matt Schaub. Ryan Fitzpatrick. Brian Hoyer.
We can keep them cheap and have an excuse for failure already built in. It’s a perfect plan.
But the final piece is going all in on yet another backup. This time, though, we give him starting quarterback money. That quarterback is Brock Osweiler.
It’s not about the money. It’s about sending a message about who’s in charge.
A side door swings open.
Bob McNair: Rick, I know it’s Halloween tomorrow, but what the hell are you wearing? We have a game today. And who the hell are you talking to?
Smith: Sorry, Mr. McNair. Can we go trick or treating now?