Fresh off the bye week, all the Battle Red balls are dry and ready to dive into some serious action! About the only thing better than going into a bye week after a win against a solid opponent is coming out of it to face a losing bunch of Jags.
Since we’re all convinced the Texans can at least beat a bunch of Jags, we’re here to once again hand out our preemptive balls to players who will certainly deserve them.
Offense - Brock Osweiler. If not now, when (which is exactly what I said about the Colts game, and that only worked out for about 3 minutes of gametime)? I'm going to allow myself to have a little faith here based on how well O'Brien has done in the second half of seasons, based on having an extra week to improve and based on Jaguars.
Defense - Jadeveon Clowney. I believe he will have his first monster game of the season. He's had good ones, and even really good ones, but this is going to be his "Connor Barwin" game where he goes crazy and plunders a terrible team.
Offense: Lamar Miller. Provided #StartBlue doesn't get more traction, Miller should have a nice day with hopefully a triple-digit rushing total and a score or two.
Defense: A.J. Bouye. Another good performance while covering Julius Thomas/Marcedes Lewis/anyone else they decide to put him on.
Offense: CJF350. Because we need to win this game and he can handle the work load.
Defense: The DB group as a whole. Because Bortles is Bortles.
Offense: Brock Osweiler. Stop laughing. I think he feels like he has something to prove coming out of the bye week and does his level best to make us think, once again, maybe we were wrong about him being total crap.
Defense: Blake Bortles...I mean, A.J. Bouye. Facing a seriously regressed Bortles can only spell good things for the Texans’ secondary. Since A.J. Bouye seems to have the hot hand of late, I see him getting a pick, hopefully returned for a touchdown, at some point during the game.
Offense: DeAndre Hopkins, I guess. This entire offense is so bad. The Jags' defense is pretty good. Hopkins has had his numbers sliced in half from last year with the arrival of Buttweiler. The only reason why I'm picking him is because of the dirty despicable things he did to Davon House last year. It was simply pornographic.
Defense: Andre Hal. Hal has had another good year, but he plays off the screen and doesn't have the interception numbers so nobody knows it. Blake Bortles is D-U-M dumb. He loves to make throws he shouldn't and thinks defenders are holograms instead of men forged of bone and sinew. If Hal plays some robber this week, with his speed and intelligence, he should be able to break on the ball once or twice and finally pick up some picks.
Offense: Lamar Miller gets fed early and often with over 100 yards rushing and over 150 all-purpose yards.
Defense: A.J. Bouye takes an interception to the house.
Offense: Brock Osweiler. Lamar Miller is the easy answer, and I believe he’ll produce, but I have a sneaking suspicion Osweiler is going to have himself a game coming out of the bye week. I wouldn’t be as confident if the opponent wasn’t one of the worst teams in the league, but this should be a situation where Brock thrives.
Defense: Whitney Mercilus. He had 5.5 of his twelve sacks against the Jaguars last year. Seems reasonable to believe he’ll go off on Blake Bortles again on Sunday.
Offense: Duane Brown, because offensive lineman need love too and he's given the offense some extra power.
Defense: Kareem Jackson. Blake Bortles is as inaccurate as Brock Osweiler and he will throw an interception. K-Jax will be the recipient
Offense: Braxton Miller. Not sure why, but it’s about time he gets that engine primed and shows off the flashy firepower that put him on the map at Ohio State. The Texans’ offense had quite a few imaginative wildcat-like plays last season, so I’m going to keep expecting them till proven wrong.
Defense: A.J. Bouye. The man needs a pick-six, or maybe even 12. I almost tossed a ball to Kareem Jackson, because he’s due for a highlight reel game of his own and people are buying into the Bouye hype, but K-Jax has to have that game before I’ll expect him to have one... if that makes any sense...
Now that our Battle Red Balls are on the table, tell us where yours are in the comments below.