Battle Red Balls: Week Eleven (Raiders v. Texans)

Our beloved Houston Texans have gone south of the border this week to take on the Oakland Raiders (who are about to go across a different border from California to Nevada).

As we do every time the Texans face the Raiders on Monday Night Football in an entirely different country, we’re going to give out our special edition of spicy Battle Red Balls this afternoon.

If ya don’t like the heat...

Queso Luke:

Offense: Duane Brown, for holding Khalil Mack to less than two sacks.

Defense: Benardrick McKinney. Double-digit tackle totals and one sack on a well timed blitz.

UprootedTexMex:

Offense: C.J. Fiedorowicz, because I still have Hopkins on my fantasy team and he will not produce as long as I hang onto him. Plus, C.J. is the only receiver Brock ever connects with anymore.

Defense: Brian Cushing, because he's due to make an appearance to remind us he still exists.

BFD! and Salsa:

Offense: Pass.

Defense: He's easily been my favorite player all season, so I'm sticking with Benardrick McKinney. He's so much fun!

Special Teams: LOLOLOLOLOL!

Mike-a-Asada :

Offense: Lamar Miller. Playing keep away from the Oakland offense is a great idea, and giving it to Lamar Miller is a good way to do that.

Defense: Whitney Mercilus. Whitney loves Mexico City so much that he'll shine under the lights. A sack, a strip sack and a few TFLs will bring even more national attention to the best kept secret on the Houston D.

Tequila Ron:

Offense: DeAndre Hopkins, as he and Brock will finally get on the same page for a 100+ yard relationship this game.

Defense: Whitney Mercilus can bend the Raiders' propeller to slow the boat race a bit.

Westonchiladas:

Offense: Lamar Miller, Alfred Blue, Akeem Hunt, Tyler Ervin...anyone who will help make sure Brock Osweiler doesn't throw the ball.

Defense: Benardrick McKinney. He's going to have to dodge the one-on-one blocks he will be getting alll night, all night, all night long from Gabe Jackson and Kelechi Osemele.

Tim:

Offense: Lamar Miller. If the Texans’ offense is going to do its part tonight, it’ll be in large part because of the team successfully running the ball, which means Lamar Miller has to come up big. He finds the end zone.

Defense: Andre Hal. Remember him? He gets the ultra rare Derek Carr interception this evening.