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2016 BRB NFL Mock Draft: With The Twenty-Fourth Pick, The Denver Broncos Select...

So, erm, the Broncos have a bit of a butt-fumble at quarterback, and a head coach who, while an offensive mastermind, does rely on a quarterback who can at least be counted out to not run into the @ss of his teammate and fumble the ball. What will the Broncos' favorite horse do? Keep reading to find out.

Colorado's favorite equine specimen is the master wheeler-dealer.
Colorado's favorite equine specimen is the master wheeler-dealer.
Mark J. Rebilas-USA TODAY Sports

The Cincinnati Bengals, who watched their season sputter when Andy Dalton injured his hand and they had to play under the lights, were on the clock, but the Denver Broncos, who saw their Superb Owl winning quarterback Peyton Manning head out to pasture and backup Brock Osweiler make the move to the Texans, have traded up into the 24th spot.  At what cost?

The Denver Broncos Receive:

Cincinnati Bengals' 2016 first round draft pick (No. 24 overall).

The Cincinnati Bengals Receive:

Denver Broncos' 2016 first round draft pick (No. 31 overall);
Denver's 2016 third round draft pick (No. 94 overall); and
Denver's 2016 fourth round draft pick (No. 136 overall).

viper17d, playing the role of John Elway, explains the trade:

The Broncos trading up here may have some scratching their heads, with no teams ahead of them with a real need at QB. With that being said, Paxton Lynch is a first round talent whose tools fit well within the Broncos' system. Absent Goff, Wentz, and Lynch, there is not another early round QB that would interest Denver. Rather than wait it out, potentially allowing another team from the second round to jump ahead of them, I have the Broncos getting aggressive here to make sure they get their guy. Parting with a 3rd and 4th rounder is a little steep, but those would've been two players that likely don't start on Denver's team -- if that means they get their QB of the future, it is worth it.

On the Bengals' side, the draft is shaping up the way they thought it would. Their primary target being no longer available, moving down seven spots in the first and taking back a 3rd and 4th can add important depth to a team that is already a contender."

He explains his pick here:

As the GM of the Super Bowl winning Broncos, I am smarter than all of you. Combined. Look, it's nothing to be ashamed of - all I do is win. People ask me all the time, "John, how the hell are you so freaking amazing at what you do?" My answer is always the same: "Desire, you f*cking moron, desire." Now, I'm not talking about something as trivial as my desire to be better than every single one of you (I don't need to desire something that is inherently true).  I'm talking about something far deeper, far more difficult to quantify -- a PLAYER'S desire to BE A BRONCO. You see, what I do is this: if a player doesn't WANT to play for Denver, I don't have them on this team (because that is TOTALLY my choice).

Look at all of the brilliant moves I've made this offseason:
1. Brock Osweiler -- you know, that no-name guy we drafted in the second round and have been grooming behind Peyton Manning who came in last year and dragged our team into the playoffs - he didn't WANT to be here, so I was like, "GTFO." All that reported news that we offered him nearly as much as Houston? That was just strategery to make Houston pay more for that guy that we trained up, had no back-up plan for, and totally didn't want. 
2. Colin Kaepernick -- look, just because we went out of the way to negotiate a trade for this wannabe does not mean we really wanted him here. If he WANTED to be a Bronco (which he clearly didn't, so he can go f*ck himself, because we didn't want him anyway), he would have given back all that money he was already guaranteed to make. 
3. Mark Sanchez -- now there's a guy with all of the intangibles. Whenever you look at the tape for a guy like that, you've got to look past all of the losing, the interceptions, and the butt fumbles - you know, really dig into his character. When you talk about QB, the most important position on the team, you need to focus on three things: 1) is he alive, 2) does he WANT to be a Bronco, and 3) are you sure he WANTS to be a Bronco? When Mark came in here and signed his contract to come to Denver, I knew we had ourselves a winner.
4. Letting Malik Jackson and Danny Trevathan walk -- scrubs. Both of them. They didn't WANT to be Broncos, so I told them, "The Broncos don't want you!" Of course, I told them that before they left, because I knew they didn't want to be here.  Genius. 

On to why I'm here: to announce the Broncos' first round pick in the 2016 NFL Draft. Despite my strong belief that we don't need to pick anyone because my team is perfect as-is -- full of players who WANT to be here -- my advisors are telling me that we need to put someone's name down on the card. 

Based on whisperings that some of my players are less excited to be Broncos than others (along with some apparent talent -- whatever that is -- and depth-related considerations), there are really only three positions I considered with this pick: QB, OL, and DT. To help rationalize this, I've included an email I got from our head coach, my main man, Gary Kubiak (I couldn't figure out how to copy and paste, so I left the whole thing in there):

"John - what the F*CK have you been doing?! I go on vacation for one week in March and my team -- the one I won a Super Bowl with -- has been F*CKING fleeced?! How did you let this happen? What the hell were you thinking? I come back and my QB of the future is gone, my starting RB is gone, and two defensive starters are gone! How do you expect me to compete here?

"OK... This is what we are going to do: we need to fix this in the draft. Running backs aren't important in this offensive scheme (I also hear that Arian Foster is available -- if he can get healthy, we go there #Texans2.0), so that is something we can live with. 

"That leaves us with two major gaps - defensive front (Malik was a beast) and QB - you know... quarterback... that position you played... It's kind of important, and don't you give me that, 'But Mark Sanchez wants to be here' crap - he's horrible. Absolutely horrible. Also, I'm going to throw in offensive line - we gave up too many sacks last year and if we want to survive with a new QB, we need the big guys to get to work.

"I think we can do something to stop the bleeding on defense... This guy I used to coach in Houston, Jared Crick - he's pretty serviceable on the line. He doesn't nearly fix the sh!tstorm you created, but it's a start. #Texans2.0. 

"At the end of the day, John, I'm absolutely nothing without a QB. Look at what I did in Houston -- I could barely tread water there without a QB. Matt Schaub was bad enough to give anyone anxiety attacks, and that was when he was playing well! That year he started throwing pick sixes left and right ("Schaubing It," as Wade and I like to put it), I got hooked on meth that year. Things got pretty crazy.  Why else do you think I ultimately went back to Case Keenum?

"With that in mind, if we can get a future franchise QB in this draft, we NEED to make that happen. If you can trade up, do it. I don't care who you trade with or what you give up -- I'm THAT useless without a QB. If we can't get Wentz or Goff, we need Paxton Lynch from Memphis. 

"The guy is 6'7", 244 lbs., and has wheels with a cannon. Most importantly for us, he likes to keep the passing play alive and has only been sacked 15 times on 477 dropbacks. Our offensive line may not be able to give him time, but this is the QB that can make time. Further, he is perfect for the bootlegs that my offense so predictably goes to. With his capabilities in a zone-read scheme, he can also make up for deficiencies at the RB position. One other important factor: this guy takes care of the ball - last year, he only through 2 interceptions compared to 19 touchdowns. I know he missed half of the season last year, but his pro day looked good and that just means he has more tread left on the tires. Sure, there are some accuracy issues, but our scheme can hide those things and I can coach him up. While in an ideal situation we wouldn't want him to start, he is capable enough with his feet to make it through this year if he's forced into starting duty - which is not that far-fetched given the complete ineptitude of Mark Sanchez."

There you have it. Because Gary is always right, and I think it would be good for Paxton to sit behind Sanchez and learn how to WANT to be a Bronco, with the 24th pick in the 2016 NFL Draft, the Denver Broncos select Paxton Lynch (QB--Memphis).

Your thoughts on the decision to trade up and then select Lynch?  Fire away in the Comments below.  Meanwhile, that puts the Pittsburgh Steelers and GannonNash on the clock.  That pick is due via e-mail by 12 p.m. CDT today and will post at 4 p.m. CDT.

1. Tennessee Titans--Laremy Tunsil (OT--Ole Miss)
2. Cleveland Browns--Joey Bosa (DE--Ohio State)
3. San Diego Chargers--Jalen Ramsey (CB/S--FSU)
4. Los Angeles Rams (via trade with the Dallas Cowboys)--Carson Wentz (QB--NDSU)
5. Jacksonville Jaguars--Myles Jack (LB--UCLA)
6. Baltimore Ravens--DeForest Buckner (DL--Oregon)
7. San Francisco 49ers--Jared Goff (QB--California)
8. Philadelphia Eagles--Vernon Hargreaves III (CB--Florida)
9. Tampa Bay Buccaneers--Ronnie Stanley (OT--Notre Dame)
10. New York Giants--Ezekiel Elliott (RB--OhioState)
11. Chicago Bears--A'Shawn Robinson (DE/DT--Alabama)
12. New Orleans Saints--Sheldon Rankins (DT--Louisville)
13. Miami Dolphins--Eli Apple (CB--Ohio State)
14. Oakland Raiders--Jack Conlin (OT--Michigan State)
15. Dallas Cowboys (via trade with the Los Angeles Rams)--Noah Spence (DE/OLB--Eastern Kentucky)
16. Detroit Lions--Laquon Treadwell (WR--Ole Miss)
17. Atlanta Falcons--Darron Lee (LB--Ohio State)
18. Indianapolis Colts--Cody Whitehair (OG--Kansas State)
19. Buffalo Bills--Emmanuel Ogbah (DE--Oklahoma State)
20. New York Jets--Leonard Floyd (OLB--Georgia)
21. Washington Redskins--Corey Coleman (WR--Baylor)
22. Houston Texans--Vernon Butler (DT/DE--Louisiana Tech)
23. Minnesota Vikings--Josh Doctson (WR--TCU)
24. Denver Broncos (via trade with the Cincinnati Bengals)--Paxton Lynch (QB--Memphis)
25. Pittsburgh Steelers--GannonNash
26. Seattle Seahawks--thepencilneck
27. Green Bay Packers--FeedEmToTheWolves1099
28. Kansas City Chiefs--Senor Stan
29. Arizona Cardinals--HovaFlow
30. Carolina Panthers--Vance87
31. Cincinnati Bengals (via trade with the Denver Broncos)--Summer of Watt