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Texans-Jaguars Predictions

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The BRB staff predicts Sunday’s contest between the Houston Texans and Jacksonville Jaguars in Tarpland.

Jacksonville Jaguars v Houston Texans
Sadness. Too much sadness.
Photo by Bob Levey/Getty Images

My friends, the Darkness has come, and the light won’t be back anytime soon.

The Jacksonville Jaguars are a legitimate playoff team, and they only figure to get better once they fire Blake Bortles into the sun next season, in favor of ANYONE.

Our future looks bright when (a lot of other things are improved, and) Deshaun Watson returns, but our present... well, it is bleak.

Let’s see how the BRB staff sees Sunday’s return date with the Jaguars going. I think you already know how this is going to go...

Tim: Jaguars 27, Texans 17.

I predict T.J. Yates, thanks to DeAndre Hopkins, actually puts some points up early on the vaunted Jacksonville defense before coming back to earth. There will be a Texans turnover that is taken to the house by the Jaguars, and I think a special teams miscue by Houston that leads to a very short field for Jacksonville's offense is also in the cards.

Surely all this success will lead to Jaguars management deciding Blake Bortles deserves a lucrative extension to remain in Jacksonville for the foreseeable future. At this point, that could be a real silver lining to this disaster of a season.

Chris: Jaguars 27, Texans 13.

Our place in the hierarchy of the football world is, sadly, under the boot of the Jacksonville Jaguars. This may change next year (PLEASE CHANGE NEXT YEAR - I CAN’T LIVE LIKE THIS) but for now, it is reality.

DeAndre Hopkins will have trouble with #LadyRamsey (perhaps the best corner in the league even last year - but he definitely has ho tendencies) but Hop still gets 8 for 80 and a TD. Houston’s secondary will struggle again with big plays, but the front seven will at least contain Leonard Fournette enough to keep it respectable.

Ugh, I just can’t handle looking up at the Jaguars. This is Football Hell.

Capt. Ron: Jaguars 30, Texans 6.

I'm hoping A.J. Bouye sticks a giant "F-U" up Rick Smith's rear end with a career single-game performance.

MDC: Jaguars 24, Texans 10.

I think it will be tied at halftime, maybe even with Houston leading for part of the first half, and then repeated mistakes by the Texans and borderline competent play by Bortles will be the difference in the second half.

The J ags will not have 10 sacks again. Clowney, however, will get to Bortles at least twice.

Kenneth L.: Jaguars 27, Texans 10.

What was that show that my sister forced me to watch? Hot or Not? Well, the Jags are hot and the Texans are not. Jacksonville has an amazing collection of talent on defense. Years of miserable seasons are finally wearing off and they have developed into the biggest threat to the Steelers and Patriots in 2017.

I cannot see a Yates-run offense putting up more than 13 points, so I will settle at 10. Fournette will bust us open late in the game and make this a swift defeat.

Titan Matt Weston, Slanderer of Blade Runner and a Huge Fan of the Texas Rangers: Jaguars 27, Texans 10.

The Texans can stop the run. The Jaguars run the ball a lot. Unless Bortles can recreate some Keelan Cole and Dede Westbrook downfield magic, there will be some struggling to move the ball in this one.

However, the Jaguars have the best pass defense in football, and they should put their offense in enough advantageous situations to win this one. It will be closer than thought at first but the Jags will sneak away. MEOW.

Jeremy Brener: Jaguars 35, Texans 13.

The Jags clinch a playoff spot with a win, and it's a game against a division rival, at home, against a third-string QB. It's exactly how you would expect it to go.

I'm watching this game simply because Nuk vs. Ramsey/Bouye is perhaps the most underrated WR-CB matchup of the weekend, and I'm riding out the season with my team, no matter how miserable this season may have been.

Luke Beggs: Jaguars 27, Texans 3.

All I want for Christmas is a A.J. Bouye pick-six and no injuries.

There you have it, a clean sweep. Even if Blake Bortles goes full Bortles, it’s hard to see a path to victory for the Texans in this one. How do you see it going? Give us your predictions in the comments section, and how about some predictions on the Nuk Hopkins vs. Ramsey/Bouye matchup as well? Enjoy the game!