If you watch Monday afternoon’s game between the Texans and Steelers, use it as a diving board. Watch it and let it spring other conversations. You’ll be sitting there with your family. The broadcast will show a shot of Rick Smith, so you say, “What was Rick Smith’s worst decision as the general manager? Should the Texans have franchise-tagged A.J. Bouye? Would you rather have Smith or Bill O’Brien remain with the team?”. Bill O’Brien will get mad at something, and you can say, “I’ll never like him for how he ignored the quarterback position for two seasons, which led to [Name Redacted], and if he is fired he should be for scraping by for the first three years of his career, not because of this sad, injury-riddled season.” And if you see Deshaun Watson, walk up to the television and give it a smooch.
I’m going to watch this game in a house filled with people that don’t like the Texans because I’m a bad brother/cousin/son/lover/stepson/nephew/grandson. I’ll be hanging around here with y’all to try to better my enjoyment, I really don’t know. So while others will be living better lives with their doodads and whatchamacallits, I’ll be watching the Texans get battered and fried. FUN STUFF.
What about you? What are you doing? Will you be putting together a train set instead? Is there a jalepeno-soaked ham calling your name? Does the new PS4 play “MVP Baseball 2005”? Did you buy Texans tickets for the whole family to surprise them, only to realize now you ruined their Christmas?
Whatever your plans, let us know in the Comments. If you're still trying to figure out what you're going to do, or if you’ll be a stranger in a strange land looking for somewhere to catch the game, pose any queries here; someone might have a suggestion for you. Similarly, if you've got a worthy spot staked out somewhere and want to clue fellow Texans fans in to it, please divulge that information in the Comments as well.