It’s here. It’s happening. It’s [NAME REDACTED] and the Houston Texans looking to enact revenge upon each other. The big bad quarterback is filling in for Ryan Tannehill while he massages a bruised AC joint. Ouch. Those things hurt.
As for me, I don’t know. I’m mixed. Before, I would wish nothing but awful and terrible things to happen to [NAME REDACTED] for being the worst quarterback in football in 2016 and wasting a great defense that season. I’d want spiders in his broccoli. Turds between his toes. A busted timing belt in his Honda Accord. A dead giraffe to be left at his doorstep.
But now, I don’t know, I don’t care too much. I hope he’s happy. I hope he’s okay. I hope he donated some of that money he got from the Texans to charity. I’m just having a terrible time getting worked up. I’ll make sure to deadlift as much as I can and starve myself to get angrier about that and help my low-T. Yet, even then, that might not even work. I’ll just be watching Thursday Night Football at the house with a friend after we record the Week Eight preview podcast.
Anyways, those are my plans. What about you? What do you have going on? Heading to NRG Stadium? Are you going to ignore network television comedies? Will you lament the first night without baseball in forever? Are you going to go for a walk and think about the past while the crows surround you and your brain is stuck with an image of [NAME REDACTED] in your head? Are there ear plugs you need to find to ignore Joe Buck and Troy Aikman? Or will you just be watching Texans-Dolphins at home, or somewhere else, like a perfectly normal person?
Whatever your plans, let us know in the Comments. If you’re still trying to figure out what you’re going to do, or if you’ll be a stranger in a strange land looking for somewhere to catch the game, pose any queries here; someone might have a suggestion for you. Similarly, if you’ve got a worthy spot staked out somewhere and want to clue fellow Texans fans in to it, please divulge that information in the Comments as well.