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Indianapolis Colts Hire Enemy Of Houston As Head Coach

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HOW DARE YOU.

Frank Reich
We haven’t forgotten, Francis.

After noting the twenty year anniversary on this website, I made a conscious decision not to draw attention to the twenty-fifth anniversary of a day that shall forever live in Houston sports infamy. It’s been a quarter of a century, I said. Deshaun Watson would wash it all away, I thought. No need to dwell in the past, I rationalized.

Then Josh McDaniels decided he didn’t want to be the Colts’ head coach.

AND THEN THE COLTS JUST COULDN’T LEAVE WELL ENOUGH ALONE.

Colts fans are excited. Good for them. They got jilted, and I’m happy that they were able to find someone willing to take millions and millions of dollars to work for a documented charlatan despite all the uncertainty surrounding their franchise quarterback.

But here in Houston, hiring Frank Reich is unforgivable. The Colts have ensured that, to the extent anyone in our fair city ever felt the slightest amount of empathy for them as they transitioned from Peyton Manning to Andrew Luck to Jacoby Brissett to Johnny Manziel to Scott Tolzien to Mike Pagel to whoever steps into the breach next, Houston shall neither forgive nor forget.

FRANK EFFING REICH IS THE COLTS’ HEAD COACH. I’m twitching. You?