Bleach Social: Where Are You Watching Texans-Patriots?

This afternoon, I’ll be at the airport. I reserved back country permits to go to Montana back in April. They gave me September. Which of course happened to be Week One of the 2018 regular season.

I wanted to go in June. You can’t always get what you want. Then Glacier National Park caught on fire, and I’m flying into Spokane, scrambling to figure out how to put this flight to use. I picked the smashed plate off the floor and ended going to Canada to Bannf (or Banff, I don’t know) to backpack this week.

So I won’t be watching the game. I’ll be day hiking up some mountain and preparing to go for a five-day walk afterwards. I’ll be back again next Sunday. I’ll catch up in the airport. I’ll wish I was leaving this post-modern wasteland the entire time and never coming back. FUN.

What about you? What are you doing for the Texans’ game against the Patriots? Are you going to be in BAWSTIN like some friends of mine and eating CHAWDAWH at the HARBAH and listening to those pasty cretins complain about BAWTTLE WATAH and unleashing the gun PAWDAH? Will you be tailgating in your own driveway enjoying the first football Sunday now that the universe is right again? Or will you be just sitting in front of that giant time sucking monolith all Sunday?

Whatever your plans, let us know in the Comments. If you’re still trying to figure out what you’re going to do, or if you’ll be a stranger in a strange land looking for somewhere to catch the game, pose any queries here; someone might have a suggestion for you. Similarly, if you’ve got a worthy spot staked out somewhere and want to clue fellow Texans fans in to it, please divulge that information in the Comments as well.