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Saturday Night’s Alright For Commenting: (4/20/2019)

Take off your pants and jacket. It’s SNOT time.

If I was the president I wouldn’t do things like pull troops out of Syria, or fix the health care system, or reach my hand across the aisle to try and unite both parties on the wings of compromise, or figure out a solution for immigration, or log into Twitter, or make basketball picks on ESPN, or sign bills, or send more people to the moon, or fund the shadow government that is NASA anymore than I have to. I would do none of these things.

I would have one goal. I would use the power of eminent domain and the beauty of public debt to buy up all that hill country land. Take a guillotine to suburbia. Murder the constant conquisition of those mounds of dirt to breed more and more gated communities. Slaughter the fenced expanses of ranch land. Steal it all back. Cut down all the barriers. Remove all the privacy. Eviscerate the leveling and the paving and then dig up all the roads.

I would steal it back. No matter what the cost. No matter how unfair the return. Then I would turn it into an enormous National Park. Wait for my four years to be up. Walk on out. Then sit by a spring, or one of those rivers that flow into other rivers for the rest of my days, and slowly watch the Earth regrow and steal it back from the cattle, the barking dogs, the three car garage, the sickening palm trees, the feed stores, and see the pink sunsets reclaim what is rightfully theirs. Then, when my time finally comes, I’d crawl into that river and let it carry me down to ocean, or if I’m lucky, into some emptied carcass of limestone, where the bat guano would boil me, and the blind bugs would suck me up.

Anyways, I’m at one of the central Texas State Parks. Walking 14 miles and trying to finish The Sound And The Fury to roll into Easter Sunday the right way. That’s all I got. This is your space to talk about whatever: how the Astros have a better baseball team than the Rangers, James Harden’s step back and constant indignation he receives, playoff hockey, springtime plans and activities, and of course, the upcoming NFL Draft. Just remember the same commenting rules apply. Enjoy your Saturday.