The Cincinnati Bengals have provided so many beautiful memories to the Houston Texans. Kevin Walter caught a game winning touchdown pass from T.J. Yates to clinch the first playoff spot in franchise history. J.J. Watt plucked a pass out of the air and took it to the house. Arian Foster glided to a touchdown run. Andre Johnson swallowed a deep left sideline pass to score in Houston’s first ever playoff win. DeAndre Hopkins tipped a pass to himself to pull in a one-handed touchdown against Adam Jones on Monday Night Football. The Red Rifle became a Red Ryder beebee gun in the lamest exchange of trash talk our species has ever seen when Houston dealt the Bengals their first loss in 2015. Deshaun Watson made his first start and took off to score his first touchdown after a flurry of broken tackles in a 13-9 Thursday Night Football win. And, of course, there was the playoff win in 2012 that none of us remember anything from.
Today’s game between the Texans and Bengals isn’t just a game. It’s a chance to make new memories. It’s the time when two bad football teams play bad football in a game that only TRUE fans will watch: “true fans” can be substituted for “mentally ill’ and it would end up meaning the same thing.
What could happen this week? Kahale Warring catches his first touchdown pass. Watson breaks single game records. Ummm, some other things. The cabinet is pretty bare. Regardless, we will still be here watching our favorite football teams play football.
This is your spot to hang out until kickoff. The first quarter thread will be posted at 11:45 a.m. Until then, happy holidays, and enjoy your morning.