I imagine you, sitting on your couch, hanging with your guys: Rich, Jay, and whoever the NFL Network decides to have on today. Your visor is on backwards to shade you from the sunlight coming in from the window that is opposite to the television. It’s been a long winter. Your skin is translucent and pinkens easily.
You sport a whistle around your neck, pen and paper next to your right hand; in your left, a stopwatch to time every 40 time yourself, because the televised times are unofficial, and we can’t be having that at all.
The Texans on the clock. We have needs to fill. We’re all in for this year.
The NFL Combine brings upon the most absurd active imagination for any NFL fan to tune in to and participate. Big chest bench press reps. Sub 4.3 40s that you can extrapolate to Sunday’s sideline. Quarterbacks only interviewing (What do they say behind those doors?) so throwing to spotty wide receivers doesn’t tumble their projected draft stock. It’s dumb. It’s insane. It’s all so very beautiful.
This afternoon, the tight ends, quarterbacks, and wide receivers participate in the 2020 NFL Scouting Combine. You can catch it all on the NFL Network. Take it all in. Fall in love. Then get upset when the Texans take someone you’ve never heard of in April.