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Okay we won a game last week and we won again on Sunday, that’s called “two in a row.” And if the Texans win again next Sunday against the 49ers, that’s called a “winning streak.” It has happened before.
I can’t say I expected to utter that quote this year. Shoot, I wasn’t sure we would even get to do the “two in a row” portion of that sentence. But here we are.
I don’t have a lot to say about the game because I was at my first Texans home game in almost 20 years and I was having fun with my friends, which made it difficult to pay attention to what was happening on the field. I do recall being confused, though. A lot. Much confused. But that could’ve also been the drinking.
So in the spirit of holiday hangovers (happy Boxing Day, by the way), this will likely be a fairly short Dog this week with minimal editing. Possibly next week too.
As always, in finest HOTD tradition, all swear words have been replaced with [kitten] to make it safe to read at work.
Enjoy!
PREGAME DISCUSSION
UprootedTexan — Today at 8:28 AM
Merry Christmas to all and to all a what the hell are we doing here?
l4blitzer — Today at 9:26 AM
Same thing we do every fall Sunday…figure out why we cheer for this team…then figure out how to take over the world…
Matt Weston — Today at 9:57 AM
MERRY CHRISTMAS
The scabs are heerrree
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lol they are playing up two practice squad siblings to pump this game up
FIRST QUARTER
UprootedTexan — 12:04 PM
There’s maybe a hockey arena’s amount of people here.
l4blitzer — 12:06 PM
Hopefully there will be as much hitting on the field…something to keep this interesting
Our first penalty of the day…all is normal
Matt Weston — 12:08 PM
lol what’s a Strachan?
l4blitzer — 12:10 PM
Tell me Staley isn’t gun shy from last week?
3-0 ex-San Diego team
Carlos Flores — 12:18 PM
Royce Freeman RB1
l4blitzer — 12:19 PM
Decent CHUMing to start…The Chargers know we don’t run well, right?
Carlos Flores — 12:19 PM
Rex Burkhead RB1
l4blitzer — 12:20 PM
Ah, the well-timed holding penalty…Texans 2021 at its finest
Matt_Robinson — 12:21 PM
Rolls Oldsmobile Freeman as I often say
l4blitzer — 12:22 PM
Texans with the rushing TD…yes, that actually happened. Texans 7-3
Matt Weston — 12:24 PM
Damn the Chargers run defense is so bad that even the Texans can run on them.
l4blitzer — 12:25 PM
Great…the Texans will now think they can CHUM all day…then again, that will move this along faster, so go ahead
Stoppage of play due to the chain gang? That’s different
7-6 Texans after a Chargers FG…Staley passes on his second straight 4th down opportunity
Carlos Flores — 12:34 PM
COWARD
Matt Weston — 12:35 PM
COWARD
l4blitzer — 12:35 PM
Jags only down 6-3 to the Jets…clearly Urbz was the sole problem
Carlos Flores — 12:36 PM
What an adventurous throw to the flat
Matt Weston — 12:36 PM
Staley’s only dumb third down decision against KC was the attempt at the end of the half because the field position wouldn’t come in play
l4blitzer — 12:37 PM
I did recall watching the play and was thinking he should have taken the easy 3…alas
Classic Texans screen game in effect.
End of 1st quarter: Texans 7, Chargers 6
SECOND QUARTER
Carlos Flores — 12:43 PM
There are people that think that Mills will outplay Herbert today.
l4blitzer — 12:45 PM
Think Herbert heard you…
Carlos Flores — 12:45 PM
He heard them, I’m not that big of an idiot LMAO
l4blitzer — 12:46 PM
Yeah, we are delusional, since we follow this team, but maybe not that bad…
Matt Weston — 12:48 PM
The Chargers trying to show HOU how to run split outside zone
I’m sick I may lose the fantasy title to Rivers because James Robinson got hurt and I didn’t see Darius Leonard had COVID
bigfatdrunk — 12:49 PM
LOL@ Texans run D.
UprootedTexan — 12:49 PM
God this game is [kitten]ing hilarious.
l4blitzer — 12:49 PM
Chargers realize that you can actually score TDs against HOU, but maybe not 2pt conversions…LAC 12-HOU 7
UprootedTexan — 12:50 PM
Half an hour into the game.
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bigfatdrunk — 12:50 PM
That’s a lot of EBITDA right there.
Rex Burkhead is still a waste of a roster spot.
Matt Weston — 12:55 PM
These are the two worst run defenses lmao
Hey, it’s Rex Burkhead’s team
l4blitzer — 12:56 PM
Texans really think they can run…unreal
Matt Weston — 12:57 PM
Mills has to put that ball upfield on the outside shoulder against inside leverage regardless of the call
l4blitzer — 1:00 PM
Commentators shocked that the Texans CHUMed on 2nd and long…they really shouldn’t be.
bigfatdrunk — 1:01 PM
Can we cut Fairbairn now?
l4blitzer — 1:01 PM
How ‘bout that? Texans w/the 51 yarder and it is now 10-12 Chargers
Matt Weston — 1:07 PM
Is Jonathan Owens going to make Justin Reid replaceable? Things we are trying to muster up to find something from this game.
l4blitzer — 1:07 PM
Owens with the pick…that’s a positive development.
You think Reid will still want to stay here after this season?
UprootedTexan — 1:11 PM
They’re playing Sweet Caroline and I’ve never been more embarrassed as a Houstonian.
l4blitzer — 1:11 PM
7 penalties this half…but remember, culture.
UprootedTexan — 1:12 PM
You’re [kitten]ing me, seven penalties?!
l4blitzer — 1:13 PM
Now 8
UprootedTexan — 1:14 PM
LOL.
bigfatdrunk — 1:14 PM
LOLOL!
UprootedTexan — 1:15 PM
[Durga], I didn’t think he had that in him.
l4blitzer — 1:16 PM
I think there cleaner games in early preseason.
bigfatdrunk — 1:16 PM
That was a [kitten] of a catch. Goodness.
l4blitzer — 1:17 PM
Ok, that was clutch.
bigfatdrunk — 1:20 PM
Playing for a FG.
Carlos Flores — 1:20 PM
Not gonna lie, that was a fantastic throw
bigfatdrunk — 1:21 PM
What the [kitten] was that?
l4blitzer — 1:22 PM
Is Mills…is Mills actually QBing good?
bigfatdrunk — 1:23 PM
No.
l4blitzer — 1:24 PM
Mills disrupts the planned end of half FG, Texans 17-12
Halftime: Texans up 17-12. (We are surprised as you are reading this).
HALFTIME REACTIONS: (aside from the expected WT[K] exclamation).
Matt Weston — 1:34 PM
We are going to see 10 Davis Mills starts next year
THIRD QUARTER
l4blitzer — 1:38 PM
We are in the zone for CHUMing
Penalty 9 for the Texans…
Surprisingly, always playing for a 50+ yard FG doesn’t always yield points.
Matt Weston — 1:46 PM
HOU has run the ball well, taken shots down the sideline, split the hooks against cover four, and here we are.
bigfatdrunk — 1:47 PM
Another first half of doing everything right...and still barely winning. It’s like a theme.
l4blitzer — 1:48 PM
Apparently we are on pace for the patented Texans 3rd quarter derp
Kenneth L. — 1:51 PM
I truly don’t recognize any of the players on this defense
l4blitzer — 1:53 PM
A 4th and long and Staley going for the FG…the Chiefs must have really gotten to him. The FG is good, 15-17 Texans.
UprootedTexan — 1:54 PM
I think we have a case against the Chargers for stealing our all field goal defense.
l4blitzer — 1:55 PM
Either that, or the Texans/Chargers are both playing NFL Blackjack, where the 1st to 21 wins
Matt Weston — 1:55 PM
Josh Allen is really on one today
Kenneth L. — 1:57 PM
Chargers fans have to be reeling rn
bigfatdrunk — 1:58 PM
Are they really that worried, though?
l4blitzer — 1:58 PM
Commentators critical of all of these CHUMs…they might be catching on.
Kenneth L. — 1:58 PM
Until they take the lead
Gorgeous ball by mills
A better receiver brings that down
Why aren’t they bringing any pressure??
l4blitzer — 2:01 PM
Perhaps the Chargers misplaced that bit of game tape on Mills?
Chargers making a second half push to win the penalty battle.
End of the 3rd: Texans 17-15 and inside the Chargers’ 5
bigfatdrunk — 2:08 PM
They are so piping in crowd noise. I mean, that crowd is 50/50 Texans at best, and there’s nobody there.
l4blitzer — 2:09 PM
Texans with an actual TD in the 4th quarter that actually matters: Texans 24-15
Matt Weston — 2:09 PM
I’d set myself on fire if I cared if LAC won or lost
l4blitzer — 2:13 PM
Jonathan Owens with his 2nd takeaway of the game.
Kenneth L. — 2:15 PM
Oh me oh my
l4blitzer — 2:17 PM
More CHUM…why not?
Kenneth L. — 2:18 PM
WHAT
what. A catch. Okay mills
l4blitzer — 2:19 PM
When it’s working, it’s working…
So is following a big play with a CHUM
Texans cash in the turnover for a FG, Texans 27-15.
Kenneth L. — 2:28 PM
That was horrific by Justin Reid
UprootedTexan — 2:30 PM
Take as old as time. Song as old as rhyme. Holding on the Texans….
Carlos Flores — 2:30 PM
Thank [Durga] for Justin Jackson saving my money leagues.
l4blitzer — 2:30 PM
Chargers deciding that it might be a good idea to score a TD…and they throw in a 2pter to boot. 23-27 Texans
UprootedTexan — 2:31 PM
I love Justin Jackson on a personal level.
l4blitzer — 2:34 PM
Chargers with all 3 timeouts…how many will they have left after this drive?
bigfatdrunk — 2:34 PM
Prevent offense.
UprootedTexan — 2:36 PM
I feel like I’m watching this game with brain damage which is probably the way to do it.
l4blitzer — 2:37 PM
How ‘bout that? A first down when needed…
I think Burkhead might actually overtake Ingram as the team’s leading rusher.
bigfatdrunk — 2:39 PM
Rex Burkhead is a waste of a roster spot.
UprootedTexan — 2:40 PM
I lost the 50/50 lottery, this game sucks.
If you can spot me in the audience I will give you a $50 Texans gift card somehow.
l4blitzer — 2:43 PM
Uh, this is really not good by the Chargers here
UprootedTexan — 2:43 PM
Oh sure I go into this game, the first Texans home game I’ve been to in nearly 20 years and they go and do something dumb like win. This is bull[kitten].
Joe Critz — 2:45 PM
HOW ARE WE BEATING THE CHARGERS
Hi everyone Merry Christmas!
l4blitzer — 2:45 PM
Marc Vandermeer giving himself a heart attack on that call: HOU 34-23
UprootedTexan — 2:47 PM
Chanting SEA-HAWKS at the Texans game to amuse myself.
l4blitzer — 2:48 PM
2 minute warning. Texans holding on to an 11pt lead…I am not making this up.
UprootedTexan — 2:50 PM
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
Kenneth L. — 2:51 PM
WHO ARE ER
We
l4blitzer — 2:52 PM
Vandermeer blows outs the ears of everyone listening on the commentary after a Thomas pick-6; 41-23 Houston…Houston??? Yes, Houston.
UprootedTexan — 2:56 PM
Garbage time TD.
l4blitzer — 2:58 PM
Chargers cut lead to 29-41. 1 for 3 on 2pt conversions
Joe Critz — 2:58 PM
Davis mills showed some serious improvement in this game
Can’t believe how much he has improved in one season
l4blitzer — 3:00 PM
Final: HOU 41-LAC 29. I think this went the way we all expected
GAME BALLS
Offense: You have to give the ball to Rex Burkhead today. After all, it’s not every day where someone breaks Mark Ingram’s Texans’ rushing yardage record.
Defense: Let’s give it to Tavierre Thomas for his game cinching pick-six. Those don’t happen often enough for the Texans.
Special Teams: Cameron Johnston gets the nod, because punters deserve some love too.
What do y’all have to say about the game? Let us know!
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