This game gives “meaningless” a new meaning. If it was possible, the NFL might have actually flexed this matchup off the schedule altogether. Despite that, DraftKings Sportsbook is still allowing people to bet on the game, with the Texans as 2.5-point underdogs. The last time these teams met, they battled to a tie, the single most unsatisfying outcome possible in pro sports. While most of the NFL viewing world will focus on the Buffalo Bills vs the Cincinnati Bengals, the Kansas City Chiefs vs the Las Vegas Raiders, Philadelphia Eagles vs the New York Giants, the Arizona Cardinals vs the San Francisco 49ers or any of the other games with major playoff implications, we’ll all be over in the corner doing the NFL fan equivalent of eating paste.

The best thing about this game is when it ends, so does the horrible 2022 Houston Texans campaign. Hopefully that also heralds the end of the Lovie Smith H-Town head coaching career. Black Monday will get interesting for sure.

For Houston, there is no upside to this game if they win. Unfortunately, there isn't one for the Baby Horses of Indianapolis either. Both teams suck. Both fanbases are hugely disappointed. Both cities deserve better from their NFL franchises. Well, at least Houston does...

When the best team related news riding into the last week of the season spotlights a retired player, you know things went (AFC) south...

Andre Johnson should be a lock to get into the NFL Hall of Fame. But, #Texans...

Houston Texans vs Indianapolis Colts Preview and Prediction

Colts lead all-time series, 31-9-1

STREAKS: Colts are 4-0-1 over last 5

LAST GAME: 9/11/22: Colts 20 at Texans 20

LAST GAME AT SITE: 10/17/21: Colts 31, Texans 3

Houston Texans Stats

• QB DAVIS MILLS passed for 202 yards and had career-high 33 rush yards last week. Passed for 240 yards and two TDs vs. zero INTs with 98.9 rating in Week 1 meeting. Needs 180 pass yards for first career season with 3,000+ pass yards.
• RB ROYCE FREEMAN has rush TD in only career game at Indianapolis (10/27/19 w/ Den.).
• RB REX BURKHEAD had season-high 70 scrimmage yards (40 rush, 30 rec.) and five catches in Week 1 meeting.
• WR BRANDIN COOKS aims for fourth in row with four+ catches. Had seven catches for 82 yards in Week 1 meeting. Has five+ catches and 50+ rec. yards in five of six career games vs. Indianapolis Is one of four in NFL (Mike Evans, DeAndre Hopkins and Travis Kelce) with 500+ rec. yards in each of past nine seasons.
• TE JORDAN AKINS aims for his third in row vs. Indianapolis with 40+ rec. yards.
• TE O.J. HOWARD tied career high with two rec. TDs in Week 1 meeting.
• DB JALEN PITRE had 13 tackles and fifth INT of season last week, tied second-most among rookies. Aims for sixth in row with 9+ tackles and third in row with INT. Has PD in five of past six. Had 10 tackles in Week 1 meeting. Leads rookies and all DBs with 139 tackles this season, second-most ever by Houston rookie.
• DB DESMOND KING had eight tackles, two TFL and second INT of season in Week 17. Had two PD and TFL in Week 1 meeting. Aims for his third in row vs. Indianapolis with 6+ tackles.
• LB CHRISTIAN KIRKSEY is one of four in AFC with 5+ tackles in 16 games this season. Had nine tackles, TFL and fumble recovery in Week 1 meeting. Aims for his third in row vs. Indianapolis with fumble recovery.
• DE JERRY HUGHES had team-high ninth sack of season last week. Had two sacks, INT and FF in Week 1 meeting. Has sack in two of his past three vs. division.

Indianapolis Colts Stats

• QB SAM EHLINGER completed nine of 14 atts. (64.3 pct.) with TD vs. 0 INTs last week.
• RB ZACK MOSS rushed for 74 yards in Week 17. Aims for fourth in row with 70+ scrimmage yards. Rushed for 61 yards and TD in his last game vs. Houston (10/3/21 w/ Buffalo).
• WR MICHAEL PITTMAN had six catches for 41 yards and third rec. TD of season last week. Had nine catches for 121 yards and TD in Week 1 meeting. Aims for his third in row vs. Houston with six+ catches and 75+ rec. yards. Needs 105 rec. yards to become fourth player in franchise history with 1,000+ rec. yards in consecutive seasons, joining HOFer Marvin Harrison, T.Y. Hilton and Reggie Wayne.
• WR PARRIS CAMPBELL had 52 rec. yards in Week 17. Had 51-yard TD catch in last home meeting. Aims for his third in row vs. division with 50+ rec. yards and rec. TD.
• DT DEFOREST BUCKNER aims for third in row with five+ tackles. Has sack in two of past three. Had fumble recovery in Week 1 meeting. Has seven sacks in six career games vs. Houston
• DE DAYO ODEYINGBO has 1.5+ sacks in two of past three.
• LB ZAIRE FRANKLIN had 10 tackles and two PD last week. Aims for eighth in row with nine+ tackles. Is one of four in AFC with five+ tackles in 16 games this season and ranks fourth in NFL with career-high 159 tackles in 2022.
• LB BOBBY OKEREKE had two TFL, FF and career-best 17 tackles last week. Aims for fourth in row with nine+ tackles. Had seven tackles and pass defended in Week 1 meeting.
• CB STEPHON GILMORE has 29 career INTs, tied sixth-most among active players.
• S RODNEY MCLEOD had TFL and first fumble recovery of season in Week 17.
• S RODNEY THOMAS (rookie) aims for third in row with 6+ tackles. Has INT and TFL in two of past three. Ranks tied fourth among rookies with team-high three INTs this season.

Houston Texans vs Indianapolis Colts Prediction

Final prediction for this one: MEH...

Yes, that’s obviously not technically a score prediction. But, it’s not inaccurate either.

With 2 backup quarterbacks, nothing to play for and a grand desire to get off the field and go home, don’t expect much in the way of memorable plays with this one.

Houston Texans 15

Indianapolis Colts 13

And, the Texans will win, thereby losing the #1 pick in the upcoming 2023 NFL Draft.