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Can’t miss, won’t miss picks for Week 4

Hey, got some money you can spare? Put your money to work with these mortal locks*.

Houston Texans v Jacksonville Jaguars
The Man.
Photo by Mike Carlson/Getty Images

On Sunday, the Houston Texans take the field in their full battle red uniforms with battle red helmets to take on the Pittsburgh Steelers in their far less interesting, far more boring non-battle red uniforms and non-battle red helmets.

But they’re not the only team going out there to pull out a W, there’s several other games coming out tomorrow, some of them even occurring at the same time as the Texans game. And if you have a bit of scratch that you can spare and aren’t doing anything with, you could do far worse things than take these picks which are not yet FDA-approved but some day they’ll get there. We just have to believe.

And here are those picks for your betting edification, brought to you by DraftKings Sportsbook.

Side note: For the Broncos/Bears game if you bet on that, please seek help. Nothing good will come from that game.

For entertainment purposes only, please do not take financial advice from a football blog.