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Three And Out: Giants-Texans Predictions

The BRB staff gathers to figure out what exactly these confusing Houston Texans have in mind for the New York Giants on Sunday

San Francisco 49ers v Houston Texans
This is NOT a surrender flag!!
Photo by Bob Levey/Getty Images

Listen, I don’t know. I really don’t. None of us do.

Maybe things will be fine. The Texans lost in New England. Everyone loses in New England! Clearly there’s no walking back or excuse-making for that horrific crime scene of a bed [KITTENING] in Nashville last week.

The Texans, on paper, should handle the New York Giants Sunday at NRG Stadium. If they do, great. If they barely win or lose the home opener? Pretty much everything changes for 2018.

Let’s see how the Masthead sees Sunday’s match-up going.

Tim: Texans 27, Giants 20.

To quote the great bard Aaron Rodgers, R-E-L-A-X. The sky is not falling. The Texans lost two road games, and now they’re coming home to face a team that’s also struggling. Things are going to get better for the good guys, and it starts this week against the Giants.

DeAndre Hopkins, Will Fuller, and Lamar Miller all find the end zone, and the Texans’ defense, shaky secondary and all, forces Eli Manning into two turnovers.

Diehard Chris - A Sensible Fellow Who Knows Hakeem Olajuwon is STILL Scraping David Robinson Bits Out of his Sneaker Treads: Texans 30, Giants 20.

The Texans will win this game and get back on track.

(Repeating to self)

The Texans will win this game and get back on track.

They will feast on Eli Manning because of New York’s poor offensive line play. They will run the ball at will. Deshaun Watson will continue to improve as he did in Week 2. Houston’s talent is just too overwhelming and will overcome Bill O’Brien’s macro and micro strategic shortcomings. We will impatiently wait as O’Brien continues to try and figure out what football plane of existence he and his coaching brain occupy, relative to the one his players occupy.

Titan Matt Weston, Slanderer of Blade Runner and a Huge Fan of the Texas Rangers, Currently 31 Games off the Pace in the AL West: Texans 23, Giants 20.

I got so many things to say about this game. My brain is overwhelmed. I’ll say it all Friday night.

The reason for my prediction is that both teams can attack the other in different ways, but I just think Houston has more talent. New York’s receivers should be able to get open and Houston’s pass rush has been empty so far. The Texans should be able to run at the tackles or outside of it and especially so if they finally use Deshaun Watson as a runner like they did last year and similar to how Blake Bortles and Dak Prescott did to New York to start the year. Also, Will Fuller V is a match-up nightmare for the boom-or-bust Janoris Jenkins.

These teams are similarly matched. I just have more trust in Houston finally getting a pass rush against Nate Solder and Ereck Flowers than I do in the Giants’ linebackers stopping Houston’s run game.

Eli Manning needs to retire.

MDC [Editor’s note: MDC!!!]: Texans 31, Giants 21.

I’ll be honest, I was going to predict a Texans loss and complain about how poorly Bill O’Brien is coaching right now.

I talked to Tim a little bit ago, however, and he convinced me that it’s not as bad as it looks. So...whatever. Tim would never knowingly mislead me about such things. I’ll play along.

Mike Bullock: Giants 34, Texans 13.

It’s really hard to believe that what we’ve seen the first two weeks of the season aren’t just more context to what we’ve seen for years now.

Eli and Odell Beckham Jr. have a field day as Houston continues to try and find their identity while sleepwalking somewhere between the snooze button and coffee pot.

Capt. Ron: Giants 24, Texans 20.

I have been overly optimistic the first two weeks, and the Texans have given no reason to think they will do anything other than start slow and finish short.

The talent is there, but the focus and intensity needed to win in the NFL still hasn’t thawed out for the 2018 season for Houston. Whatever is in the water up at the Greenbrier is obviously the opposite of what a pro team needs to be ready for competition, or perhaps the coaches don’t know how to get the team ready. I do think we’ll eventually see them turn things around this season, but probably just in time to miss a wild-card spot with a 7-9 to 9-7 record in a very different AFC South where that won’t be enough any more.

This should be a game where the Texans feast on a weaker opponent, but lately that’s often when the other team enjoys a “get right” game in front of a confused and depressed crowd at NRG. O’Brien will lose a one-possession tilt to put his record at 2-10 in the most recent of such contests.

I hope I’m wrong.

BFmf’nD: Texans 27, Giants 13.

Not unlike the Texans, the Giants’ offensive line is straight trash. The difference, however, is that the Giants have almost no talent while the Texans do. The Texans’ o-line will get better this season, and against an iffy pass rush, I think we’ll see it play out on Sunday.

This is also the type of game that Bill O’Brien wins as this is a classic “punch down” game against an inferior opponent. Of course, that should have been the case against the BE-SFs last Sunday, so shrug emoji. Also, it’s my longstanding belief that BOB does just well enough to keep his job while the Texans franchise goes absolutely nowhere with him at the helm.

Kenneth L.: Giants 27, Texans 17.

I just do not see it. The Giants’ offense will obliterate the Texans’ passive secondary. OBJ versus whoever is going to be a bloodbath. You need two people to cover him and you need an extra safety in the box to stop Saquon Barkley. That leaves us in a dime package with Justin Reid as the sole safety over the top.

The Texans’ offense has fluctuated too much for me to predict a win. Worries about the season are boiling right now. I am aggravated.

Jeremy Brener: Giants 20, Texans 19.

It’ll be close. Both teams need the win. I hope the Texans can rebound because they are at home, but I’m simply doing this to preserve the jinx.

Luke Beggs: Texans 24, Giants 13.


I do think the home crowd will greatly help and I think the weird point swings that were brought about by the special teams stuff last week aren’t going to happen again (well, there’s a jinx). I trust the Texans to bounce back and play well in front of the home crowd.

I love Saquon Barkley, but I still think the Giants’ offense is maybe a year off from making the most of him.

Optimistic? Pessimistic? Resigned? Nonplussed? Confounded? Bewildered? Mystified? Dumbfounded?

Where are you this week with this team? How do you see the game going? Would you like to provide your answers in the form of a question? If so, may I ask that you insert said answers in the comments section below?